Expressions Of The Self

ANOTHER MEME..

2009-11-04T08:47:08Z

Another.. Good lord. And yes, this is LUCKY, which means YAOI.

Buddy Meme:

1. Get a buddy to pick 10 letters.

2. Have another buddy pick a word starting with each letter.

3. Pick one pairing.

4 Keep responses under 1000 words.

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B - Book:

"...The soft lights and bare skin were en..entick.."

"Enticing. Take your time, you're doing just fine."

"..Enticing, and he r..reached for his lover with a smile. Gathering the other to himself, he bent down to kiss their se..sen.."

"Sensual. Just sound it out, Tyki."

Golden eyes regarded him narrowly, their owner scowling as he sat aside the novel he'd been holding. "Lavi, I fail to see how this is in the least bit helpful."

"It's easier with familiar words. And trust me, it's very helpful.. That's enough for now though. Why doncha' come here and see if we can work on your pronounciation?"

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C - Crown:

"One hundred!"

The man at the podium gave the redhead an incredulous look before bringing his hammer down solidly in the ensuing silence. "Sold, to the young gentleman with the eyepatch. Next, we have a fine catch, a banker by trade.."

Ignoring the auctioneer's intrusive sales pitch, Lavi stepped forward to claim his 'prize' for the evening. "Well? Don't just stand there gawping like an idiot, let's go."

The brunette raised an eyebrow questioningly, but donned his tophat in readiness to follow. "What are you doing here, boy? You're exceedingly conspicuous in the presence of so many of the fairer sex.." He smirked at the other's sudden flush, making his way through the crowd of bustles and hoopskirts with easy grace. "Were you merely feeling charitable, then? I don't think anyone else has had even half so much bid for them.."

The Exorcist growled warningly, ducking into a convinient alley before whirling to face the surprised man. "What were you doing up there? If I'd waited ten more seconds, you'd be trailing off after some floozy! Is this your idea of fun, Tyki?" He gripped the man's arm suddenly, his hold just shy of painful. "I told you once, I don't share."

Shaking his head, Tyki laughed softly. "It's only a gentleman's auction, Lavi.. I highly doubt that ladies of ill repute would go to the trouble or expense of paying for the type of attentions you're implying." Stepping closer, he urged the redhead's back to the wall, his smile turning lecherous as he bent his head. "Besides that, you don't need to pay for the evenings I spend with you.. Is your Order footing the bill?"

Lavi scoffed loudly, his face annoyed despite his rising blush. "No, it's my own money. Anyway, let's get out of here, it stinks-"

The older man cut him off with a bruising kiss, the hand not being held by the Exorcist sliding lower than was strictly proper as he hummed. Leaning back, he smiled at the other's stunned expression. "Of course, Lovely.. I trust you've taken the time to procure more fitting accomidations for the night?"

The redhead nodded blearily, gesturing toward the street. "Yeah.. But it's a little on the cheap side, since I pretty much kept hold of as much as I could, just in case.." He pushed away from the stone, his lips curving upward as he pulled the older man in for a slower kiss. "Come on, let's see if you're worth the expense, huh?"

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G - Gentle:

"I told you I'm fine, Tyki.. Can't you just-"

The brunette shook his head firmly, hands pressed lightly against the Exorcist's lifted hips. "You most certainly are not fine, Lovely.. Even this may be too much too soon."

Lavi scowled up at him despite the lingering ache in his knee, refusing to admit that the older man could be right. "It's been a week, dammit! I swear to God I'm going to tie you up if you don't.. Oooh.. Oh, fuck yes.."

Tyki smiled in satisfaction, rocking his hips meaningfully. "Is this still not to your liking, Lavi..? You're not the only one who's been waiting, you know."

The boy's reply was something that almost sounded like English, but his meaning was clear to the brunette currently nestled between his bare thighs. "I thought so.. Now, let's see if kissing it better applies to the whole body, yes?"

Later that night, Lavi promised himself that while he would make every attempt to keep himself from injury, sometimes an accident here and there could be considered a very good thing when one's nurse had such pleasant means of healing at his disposal.

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H - Honesty:

"You didn't have to say it like that!"

Tyki winced at his lover's indignant face, wondering if the couch would be any more comfortable than he remembered. "I thought you wanted me to tell the truth, Lovely.. So I did. Why did you ask if you were only going to be angry at me?"

Logic failed to placate the boy. "You knew what I meant! You could have just said it was good or bad, you didn't have to give the details!"

Closing his eyes, the brunette sighed. "It isn't that simple, Lavi.. Saying it was one or the other is far too general. I thought you might want to know why I thought so." Attempting a smile, he eyed his lover closely, noting his slight blush. "Would it help if I said you're much better at it now? It was only a matter of learning what to do about your teeth.."

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I - Insult:

"You look like a simpleminded pirate."

"Well.. You have girly hair."

"And you have an inordinantly round and feminine backside."

"...You like it."

"Indeed I do, Lovely.. I'd like it much better if it were within touching distance, however."

In retrospect, Lavi thought that maybe they should fight more often, especially when the older man seemed so fond of the eventual reconcilliation.

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K - Kilogram:

"Oh my God!"

Living with his often volitile lover had made Tyki largely immune to startlement, but when the redhead's exclamations came during a seemingly normal trip to the bathroom, he took notice. "Lovely..? Are you all right in there..?" Concern for his significant other's privacy made him halt at the closed door, but the continued vituperations left him wondering if perhaps he should overlook the proper response in this instance.

The Exorcist grew ominously silent, then began to mutter almost too quietly to be heard. "Gotta be wrong.. No way have I gained... Gotta be all the eating out. Tyki!"

The man jumped at his sudden yell, clearing his throat nervously as the door flew open with a crash. "Yes, dear..?" He blinked at the half-dressed boy in surprise, his eyes lingering over the exposed length of his legs. "Is something the matter..?"

The boy ignored his scrutiny, stalking past him with a growl. "From now on, we're eating at home. And I'm not leaving the house. Ever." He jerked open the wardrobe, muttering a garbled repetition of the words he'd spoken in the bathroom as he rummaged quickly through their clothes. Yanking out a pair of pajamas, he stepped into them with an awkward stagger, tying the drawstring with jerky movements as he continued to rant. "And I'll make the grocery lists, got it? No more of that.. Heavy stuff you get."

Drawing on years of learning and experience, the brunette nodded rapidly. "Absolutely, Lovely.. That would be simply marvelous." Eyeing the Exorcist closely, he smiled. "Going back to bed, Lavi? Would you care for a bit of company..?"

The redhead stared at him blankly for all of a minute, then shook his head. "No. If you come with me there'll be touching, and naked.. No way. I'm not taking anything off until.." He faltered, flushing brightly. "Nevermind. Just.. Leave me alone for a while." And with that, he buried himself beneath the blankets, nothing but the top of his head protruding from the thick material.

Tyki frowned, shaking his head in confused exasperation. Wondering at the cause of the dramatics, he walked to the bathroom, bending to retrieve a crumpled pair of slacks from the floor. Thinking rapidly, he glanced from the pants to the still-ensconced redhead, then forced down a giddy surge of mirth.

In light of his lover's.. Sensitivity, he thought that perhaps it would be wise to separate their clothing from now on.

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L - Letter:

Lavi scowled again at the empty space beside him, wondering where his personal bedwarmer had gotten to so early in the morning. After so many years of waking with the older man's capable arm draped securely around his middle, he felt both chill and decidedly out-of-sorts, the unaccostomed roomyness of the bed exaggerated by his disappointment.

Giving in to a moment of utter childishness, he snatched the brunette's pillow from it's place, squeezing it to his chest as he buried his face in the familiar scent of his lover with a sigh. A faint noise drew his attention, and he glanced up distractedly, blinking in surprise at a slightly crumpled sheet of paper that had been secreted away beneath the pillow.

Sitting up, he reached out to retrieve it, smiling at the obvious scrawl of his lover's handwriting. His smile faltered as he read, his cheeks paling before turning a vivd red, his eye wide as he refolded the paper in stupified silence. Swallowing heavily, he made his way to the bathroom, turning on the water with jerky movements that belied his still-present surprise.

Testing the temperature with one hand, he stepped into the tub carefully, reaching slowly for the nearby soap and washcloth. Paying close attention to the feeling of warm lather on his skin, he hummed quietly. Remembering the contents of his lover's message, he shivered, hands lingering as he rinsed himself.

No, waking alone would never be one of his favorite things, but the unpleasantness could definitely be overlooked when one took into account the benefits of being told exactly what to expect when the missing partner made his return.

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R - Ricochet:

"Lovely, I said I was sorry! It wasn't as if I meant to hit you, I just don't have the athletic inclination-"

The redhead glared at him blearily, the look no less severe for the steak pressed firmly to his smarting eye. "Tyki, you bounced a soccer ball off two walls, a street sign, the curb and a dog. Then blacked my eye with it. There is no way that can be coincidence."

Reminded of the spectacularness of his failure at sports, the Noah winced. "Lavi, with all of that, how could it be anything but sheer chance? Everything else nonwithstanding, I couldn't have possibly known that the dog would be there.."

The redhead snorted rudely, shaking his head. "Maybe not, but from now on we'll just stick to horizontal athletics, yeah?"

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S - Salty:

Lavi shook his head in dizzy amusement, watching the older man lick his lips. "I still don't see why you like that.. Doesn't it taste weird?"

The brunette smiled lazily, bending to lap at the Exorcist's skin. "Not especially so.. I have yet to find anything of yours to be distasteful, Lovely.. This included."

The boy squirmed when the other's quiet words sent a ticklish vibration over the sensitive flesh, laughing. "Well, I'd think it would make you awfully thirsty, if nothing else.. D'you think we could start over when you finish?"

Tyki nodded firmly, his lips leaving a damp path in their wake as he shifted to kiss the redhead's grinning mouth. "Most definitely. In fact, I think I'm quite done.." He smirked at the other's eager wriggles, allowing him to wrap his arms around his bare shoulders tightly. "Mmm.. I wonder though.. Is it strange that I find your tears to be attractive, Lovely? Perhaps it's the fact that they aren't from sadness that makes them appealing.."

Nuzzling fondly at the man's throat, Lavi snickered. "I like it when you're strange, Tyki.. You wouldn't be laying here naked if you were normal.."

The brunette hummed softly in agreement, his nose buried in the other's sweat-dampened hair. "Indeed.. Now, how about we see to your appetite, hm?"

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T - Treasure:

Tyki smiled thoughtfully as he gazed over his sleeping lover, his eyes bright as they lingered over the veritable trove of wealth to be had.

Golden skin, soft hair just a shade lighter than garnet.. And even though the useless patch covered one and an eyelid covered another, eyes the exact color of warm emeralds..

He laughed quietly at his thoughts, wondering if his lover would be likewise amused by his romantacised notions. Despite the fact that he knew he must seem ridiculous, there was no denying the truth of things, and that thought alone made up for a million trite sentiments on it's own.

This was his lover, a bounty of incalcuable value for him and him alone, something much greater than any prize taken through the trade of mere objects or money.

The boy shifted slightly, long limbs stretching as he mumbled something not altogether legible in his waking. Smirking to himself, the brunette slid closer, hands all but itching to touch despite the lateness of the hour. Rich though he was, sometimes a bit of carefully applied spending was well worth the effort, especially when the payoff was limitless.

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Yay..

A New meme...

2009-11-02T14:16:50Z

This was started on my group's website, feel free to use it if you want, but consider linking me your try, as I'd like to see what you come up with :P

Rules of the meme:

1. Pick a single pairing.

2. Go from A to Z, keeping the replies under 500 words.

3. Someone else must provide the words for each letter.

4. The author may pick ONE letter/word for themself.

Heh.. My self-picked letter was K - Key.

My pairing is, of course, Lucky.

Enjoy my attempts!

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A - Accent:

"I believe you have a fetish, Lovely.." Tyki smirked at the redhead beside him, carefully marking his place with a slip of paper as he closed the book. "I only wonder, is it the novel or the narrator?"

Lavi grinned widely, taking the man's arm and pulling him to his feet. "Well, I guess it depends on what you're reading.. But I think you make it all sound erotic and hot on purpose, because you never sound like that when you talk to anyone else."

Allowing himself to be led in the general direction of their bed, Tyki hummed. "Perhaps.. But then again, you don't really need to bend quite so far to untie your shoes, do you? I believe I'm justified in using the weapons at my disposal if you can do likewise."

Lavi glanced over his shoulder with a smile, his shoes forgotten as he laughed. "Oh, feel free. Besides that, what would you say to an early night?"

The reply was something blatantly toned and obviously foreign in origin, and Lavi snickered even as his blood rushed in his ears. "That sounds pretty good to me.. Now, get rid of your pants and tell me what it means."

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B - Butter:

"Tyki Mikk!"

At the sharp tone of his lover's voice, the aforementioned brunette straightened in his chair. "Yes, Lovely?"

The redhead failed to be mollified by the agreeableness of his reply. "We're out of butter."

Raising an eyebrow, Tyki shrugged. "And that's bad because..?"

Lavi growled in frustration, gesturing at the kitchen. "It's bad because I need it! I'm making cake, and we. have. no. butter!"

Forcing down a grin at the other's dishevelled appearance, Tyki nodded. "Well, that is rather inconvinient.. Are you sure..?"

The Exorcist hissed in fury, one flour-speckled hand swiping at his equally flour-speckled nose. "Yes I'm sure! I looked everywhere, so unless you're hiding it, we're out!"

Biting his lip, the brunette cleared his throat. "Shall I nip out and get some, then..?"

Lavi glared at him suspiciously, nodding. "If you would.. And get some oil. The kind I won't need for cooking."

Smirking, Tyki pushed his feet into his shoes, pausing by the door for a faintly vanilla-scented kiss. "Of course.. But you must admit, you were in as much of a hurry as I was, Lovely."

Only his preturnatural agility saved him from a quick foot to the rear, but in light of the other's utterly charming blush, he deemed the effort well worth the risk.

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C - Candid:

Smirking at the younger man's wide eye, Tyki relaxed into his chair. "What? You wanted an honest answer, yes?"

The boy nodded slowly, setting aside his notepad with a quiet swallow. "Honesty's good, but I don't think I should put that in my article.. Could I just leave that question and answer out?"

The brunette's smile widened as he kicked off his shoes, his jacket following as the boy raised a hand to the front of his own shirt. "Oh, certainly.. I suppose its also for the best that your photographer already left to develop his films." Unfastening his belt, he looked over the other's bare skin as he continued to disrobe, his expression pleased. "Are you also not going to write about that?" He gestured at the redhead's obvious arousal, his tone playful as he urged him closer. "I thought you wanted an in-depth interview?"

Biting his lip, Lavi took the man's offer, settling himself carefully atop the brunette's lap. "I did, but I don't think anyone would be interested in just how deep-"

Tyki cut him off with a kiss, his hands roaming over the other's back appreciatively. Leaning back, he smiled up at the boy with a soft chuckle. "No one but you, Mr. Reporter.."

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D - Doorbell:

"Ignore it! Ignore it!"

Tyki laughed breathlessly at his lover's urgent demand, his hands firm against the redhead's hips as he moved. "What if its something important? Perhaps its an emergency.."

The Exorcist arched his back with a mewl, his heels digging into the man's back. "There's an emergency right- Oh, fuck! -here! To hell with the one out- There! There!"

Biting sharply down against the other's collarbone, Tyki smiled when the doorbell faded into silence, his agreement signified by a rougher pace. "As you wish, dear.."

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E - Ecstacy:

Gasping quietly, Lavi ground himself against the man behind him, his hands closed and white-knuckled on the wooden headboard. "Please.. Tyki, please!"

The brunette growled in reply, hips snapping forward even as he adjusted his angle slightly. "Too close, Lovely..? I thought you wanted to take our time.."

The boy shook his head rapidly, the slide of sweat on his breastbone making him shudder. "Fuck time, s'too good.. Got all night, don't we?"

Tyki hummed breathlessly in agreement, his hold firm as he pulled the redhead fully onto his knees. Biting down on one shoulder, he pressed a hand against the other's chest to steady him. "All night. Now?"

The only reply was a shaken whimper, and he smiled against the Exorcist's pulse. "Then let go.. I don't want to wait either, Lovely."

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F - First:

Tyki prided himself on many things, the least of which was being the first (and only) one to bring just such a look to his lover's face. Brushing the hair away from his sweaty brow, he smiled in contentment at the boy's grateful hum. "Enough for now, Lovely..? It is becoming rather late.."

The redhead curled against his side with a thoughtful sound, his breathing still faintly rushed with spent excitement. "Maybe.. But do you have anything to be up for in the morning? I don't.."

Shaking his head, the older man tugged the sheets up to cover them. "Nothing besides meals, Lavi.. And perhaps a bath."

The Exorcist grinned knowingly, his fingers tracing small hearts on the other's back. "Baths are good.. But getting to need one is better, yeah?"

Tyki nodded, squirming as the boy's hand slipped lower towards his waist. "I suppose its also good that I just restocked the towel shelf, then.."

The redhead replied with an easy smile, reminding his lover that seconds, thirds and perhaps fourths were all equally pleasant things in light of the eventual outcome.

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G - Grass:

Sorting the laundry was definitely not one of Tyki's favorite passtimes. Sighing, he shook out a pair of pants, pausing at a flash of bright green. Taking a closer look, he smiled at the clear smudges on the knees of his lover's pants, remembering the blissful contrast of cool half-damp grass and sweat-slicked skin, the brilliant red of the Exorcist's hair against the faded brown of dry earth..

Digging through the clothesbasket, he pulled out a likewise stained shirt, smirking at the ruined elbows of the garment.

No, laundry was never a pleasant thing.. But sometimes one could find the most unexpected reasons to enjoy a monotonous task.

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H - Hypocrite:

"Not here, dammit! We'll be home in like, an hour, Tyki! Just wait.."

The older man's smile grew slowly, even as his hands slipped lower against the blushing redhead's hips. "I could wait, I suppose.. But I think it might be easier to do that if you'd stop moving, Lovely.." He glanced pointedly at the Exorcist's frontside, which was currently pressed firmly against his own chest as the boy arched away from the alley wall. "Perhaps this is a case of the left hand doing aught that the right one wills?"

Lavi bit his lip in annoyed arousal, his hands clenching against his lover's back as he growled. "I guess it is, then.. Just hurry the hell up, before I change my mind."

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I - Ignorance:

"Oh, God..."

The brunette smiled despite the darkness, his hands busy on tan skin. "Indeed.. Lift your hips, Lovely."

The redhead beneath him arched obligingly, his own fingers tangled deep into the older man's hair as he panted. "Hurry.. up! You've been.. All night-"

Tyki laughed breathlessly, nodding against the boy's shoulder. "You were hard to miss.. Raise your arms."

Shrugging off the heavy material of his shirt, Lavi moaned appreciatively as the man licked slowly across the now-bare skin of his chest. "Fuck, that's good.. I was watching you, too.. Aren't you ready yet?"

The older man nodded eagerly, his own clothing discarded without care as he followed the redhead's pulse upward along his throat. "I saw you.. But this is very sudden, do you do this type of thing often?"

The redhead shook his head rapidly, his hands clumsy in the dark as he clung to the man. "No, just this once.. You're just so-"

Tyki nodded understandingly, his mouth gentle on the other's skin. "As are you, Lovely.. But that's not quite right. What's your name?"

The redhead laughed giddily as he pressed quick kisses to the other's shoulder. "Anything works.. But it's Lavi. What's yours?"

The brunette jerked backward with a startled sound, his voice rushed. "You don't know who I am? Oh, hell.."

Catching the uncertainty in the older man's words, Lavi sat up. "What, should I know you? Please tell me it's something we can talk about after..?"

Sighing in resignation, the Noah resumed his touched with a faint nod. "After will be fine, Lavi.. They do say ignorance is bliss.."

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J - Justice:

"It's not right!"

Lavi clenched his hands into fists, glaring up at his lover fiercely. "Why do you have to cover for him? He'd turn on you in a second and you know it!"

Tyki sighed loudly, reaching for his coat. "Because it's what brothers do, Lovely.. By blood or not." He raised his voice over the other's growl of protest, pulling his gloves from one pocket. "Isn't this why you stay with me, Lavi? Because I try to do the right thing, more often than not? What if it was one of your friends, locked up for something they may have done by mistake, without so much as a penny to their name? I'm not bringing him here this time, if that's what you're concerned about."

Lavi shook his head resolutely, stepping back as the man shrugged the heavy garment on. "Sheryl knew exactly what he was capable of when he started that fight! If that man dies from falling off that ledge, it's the same as mur-"

Tyki whirled on him, his eyes narrow with wrath. "Even the officer outside said that the fellow was spoiling for a fight, Lavi. He just made a poor choice of targets." Buttoning his coat with jerky motions, he continued his reply with a sideways look. "I don't intend to justify myself to anyone, Lovely, even if it's you.. Just let me do this because I need to, all right?"

The redhead forced himself to relax, blinking rapidly to clear his stinging eye. "I don't need to let you do anything, Tyki.. But I expect you to give me the same option."

Opening the bedroom door, the brunette stared back at him levelly. "Do what you need to do, then. Lock the door if your conviction leads you out of it."

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K - Key:

Sighing at the quiet that met him, Tyki removed his coat and gloves, hanging the former on a hook after placing the latter inside one pocket. Making his way to the house's kitchen, he took a glass from the shelf, filling it from a bottle nearby. Leaning against the counter, he drank deeply, his eyes straying over the room as he contemplated his newly-aquired singleness. A splash of color on the table caught his eye, his hand unsteady as he sat his drink beside him.

The handwriting was almost painfully familiar, the loopy scrawl nearly unreadable even after years of practice.
"I suppose we don't really need the groceries.."

A faint sound from the doorway made him jump, his eyes widening at the silently watching figure there. "Lavi..?"

The redhead smiled nervously, holding out a hand that shook. Opening his fingers, he showed the man the tiny object he held. "If it's all the same, I'll keep this.. Do you mind..?"

Almost groaning in relief, Tyki crossed the floor, snatching the surprised Exorcist to himself with a laugh. "No, it's yours as long as you want it, Lovely.. Along with everything else here."

The boy relaxed into his embrace with a grateful noise, nodding against the front of his shirt. "It and you. That's enough."

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L - Laugh:

"..and I said 'Of course, but I don't think your wife would be very pleased and she's standing right behind you with a rolling pin.'"

Clutching at his stomach, Lavi waved a hand for silence, his eyes streaming as he snickered weakly. "Oh, my God Tyki..! Was she really?"

Nodding happily, the Noah grinned at his lover's renewed hilarity. "She really was, Lovely.. And she heard the entire conversation, including her husband's blatant proposition. Can you beat that?"

Shaking his head, the Exorcist wheezed faintly. "Hell no.. But it doesn't matter. Can I get my breath before you collect your 'debt'?"

Smirking widely, the brunette shook his head as he reached for the other's half-buttoned shirt. "I don't think so.. I rather like you breathless, Lavi."

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M - Milk:

Laughing drunkenly, Lavi nudged the older man with a foot beneath the table. "I know you're the ultimate power of evil, Tyki.. But there's got to be something you just can't do."

Taking a sip from his overfull glass, the brunette nodded. "I'm sure that's so, Lavi.. But I have yet to discover what that might be."

Taking a drink from his own cup, the Exorcist mulled over the thought before grinning. "I got one.. Can you milk a cow?"

The unexpectedness of the question sent the older man into a brief spasm of hilarity. "Despite the ridiculousness of that question.. Yes. Yes, I can."

Scoffing at his cavalier reply, Lavi waved a hand. "Yeah, sure you can.. I bet you can milk cows, goats, anything."

Tyki refilled his glass, nodding companionably. "Anything. Well, anything with nipples, that is."

Grinning crookedly, the redhead snatched the bottle from his hand, taking a drink directly from it. "Right. I have nipples, can you milk me?"

In retrospect, Lavi wondered if he should stop drinking altogether, or drink with every meal.

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N - No:

"No."

The brunette frowned thoughtfully, his mouth curling into a smile as he leaned a bit to one side. "How about now?"

"..No."

Nibbling at his lover's throat, he sighed. "Nothing at all, Lovely..? It's only just after midnight.."

The redhead shifted slightly, his eye closed as he sighed. "No."

Tyki bit his lip, fingers tracing the line of the Exorcist's naked thigh. "I'm beginning to feel a tad put out, Lavi.. Is this beginning to get old?"

Hiding a smile, the boy shook his head. "No.."

Catching the faint amusement in his voice, the older man snorted, digging his fingers into the junction of his leg and body. "You little devil! Admit it, you're thinking of something horrid!"

Lavi squealed at the insistant tickling of the other's touch, wriggling away from the nearly painful sensation. "No! Don't! Tyki- Oh God stop!"

Snickering to himself, the Noah halted his torture, pinning the slighter form with his own. "Whatever it is, stop it. I promise not to tease you about your lack of control, so please..?"

In the following hours, Lavi found that good things most certainly did come to those who wait.. Especially when the above mentioned good thing involved a thouroughly aroused and desperate Noah.

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O - Order:

Tyki smiled at his anxiously fidgeting lover, his fingers deliberately slow as he unfastened his shirtbuttons. "Something the matter, Lavi..?"

The boy swallowed audibly, eye glued to the gradually revealed skin as he nodded. "Yeah. You really can't leave that on and get rid of-"

The brunette laughed softly, shrugging the open garment over his shoulders before reaching for his belt. "Now, you know there's a right way to do things, Lovely.. We wouldn't want to get out of sorts, would we? It would set off the entire process."

The Exorcist licked his lips, shaking his head. "It wouldn't make too much of a difference..Trust me, I know exactly what needs to happen, no matter what comes first."

Dropping the slip of leather to one side, Tyki unfastened and unzipped his slacks, allowing them to slide teasingly low on his hips. "I'm sure that's true, but there's a time and place for everything.."

Lavi bit his lip to stifle an unmanly whine, his hands itching to reach for his amused lover. "Well, I think the time is right this fucking second, and the place is somewhere just south of where I'm about to put my hands. If you don't hurry the hell up, I'm going to make you watch, Tyki."

Sighing in mock despair, the Noah kicked off his pants and undershorts, moving to rest between the redhead's eagerly spread legs. Dragging slow fingers over the smooth skin, he allowed the boy to take hold of his arms and pull him atop his equally naked body, pausing just above his parted lips. Smiling at the feel of the Exorcist's passion-quickened breath, he pressed a light kiss to his mouth. "Then by all means, let us proceed in a timely manner, Lavi."

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P - Praise:

"How's that?"

The older man's reply was low and somewhat garbled, his hands clenched deeply in the blankets to avoid seizing his lover's hair.

Smiling at the sound, Lavi repeated his slow lick with a contented purr. "Speak up, I can't hear you from all the way down here.. Should I come up there instead?"

Now the man did reach for him, the pronounced shake of his hands making the Exorcist's grin widen. "Don't you dare, Lovely.. I want you exactly where you are, doing exactly- Oh, my God.."

His words tapered off into incoherant moans that sounded somewhat like the name of the boy sprawled casually between his naked thighs, and he flushed deeply at the resulting chuckle even as his hips lifted away from the mattress in silent pleading.

Much, much later in the evening, he found himself wondering if the redhead truly understood the implication of his inability to respond with understandable words. Watching his kiss-swollen lips curve upward as he slept, he thought that surely he must.

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Q - Queasy:

Wiping his lover's forehead gently, Lavi bit his lip at the man's low groan of discomfort. "Tyki..? For what it's worth, I really am sor-"

The brunette waved a hand dismissively, the movement prompting a second sound. "It isn't your fault, Lovely. You didn't make me eat it.. Let's just not dwell on it, hm?"

The Exorcist nodded glumly, rewetting the cloth from the bowl of cool water on the nightstand. Wringing it out, he dabbed carefully along the man's neck and chest. "I know you're not really mad, but I'm mad at myself.. I know my cooking sucks, but I know you'll eat anything I make.. I should have known it wasn't right just by the color.."

Laughing quietly, the brunette took his hand, dropping the damp cloth back into the bowl to lace their fingers together loosely. "As should I, Lavi. But I don't mind being momentarily indisposed.. After all, I have a wonderful nursemaid to help me back to health."

Despite his lighthearted reply, the Noah swore to be far more discerning in his eating habits, especially when the cook was half-distracted from proper timing by someone's teasing at the opposite end of the kitchen.

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R - Rendezvous:

Glaring up from his place on the ground, Tyki wished for the tenth time that he'd chosen another bar to go to this evening. "As entertaining as this is, boy, I think you should leave well enough alone.. Do you enjoy starting drunken brawls with what other people think are perfectly normal human men?"

The Exorcist laughed at the faint slur in the other's voice, dispelling his weapon with a grim smile. "Oh, so you can't fight if your skin looks like mine? That's good to know.. Besides that, how about you stop pretending that four drinks is enough to put you under? I've been watching you for about two hours, and there's no way you're really that drunk."

The brunette sighed quietly, leaning against the the wall. "Was there something you needed, Exorcist? I've had quite a bit more than that since I got here, and I was starting to think of making my way home, to bed.. Unless you wish to join me there, our fascinating discussion will have to wait." He pushed himself to his feet with a minimum of wavering, eyebrows rising as the redhead stored his hammer with a smile. "What's this?"

Lavi snickered rudely, gesturing toward the street. "Sounds good.. I know the place you're staying, if you're having trouble remembering the way.."

Shaking his head, the Noah offered him a mocking arm. "It figures.. But we'll talk about that after we get there, hm?"

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S - Skirt:

"C'mon, I'm not saying it was bad... But it really DID look like a dress!"

The older man scowled at the laughing redhead, wondering if he should mention that the boy most likely needed lungs.

"It didn't. Dresses have tops, yes? I distinctly recall a bit of a breeze topside, Lovely."

The Exorcist snickered, waving off his paltry defense. "Ok, then what about the bottom? Pants underneath or not, that was definitely a skirt."

Sighing, Tyki silently cursed his former master for providing ammunition to his grinning companion, his ire raised by the obvious heat in his face. "You act as if I had any say in my choice of attire, Lavi.. But besides that, whose idea was it to put the chaps on the outsides of your pantslegs? And whyever in the world did you decide to wear them that way..?"

Lavi's smile faltered momentarily before returning full force. "That's easy.. Our Supervisor designs the uniforms, and he's a dirty old man. I wore it because it was comfy.. And you gotta admit, they make my ass look brilliant."

Glancing at the other surreptuously, Tyki found himself at a loss to continue his argument.

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T - Table:

Tyki stretched tiredly, hissing at the sting in his muscles. "Lavi, are you quite sure you're all right? You look a bit..."

The redhead groaned, muttering something unintellegible as he sat up. Wincing, he cleared his throat. "Yeah, I'm fine.. Great. Other than this knot in the middle of my back." Eyeing the older man closely, he laughed. "And the same question right back at you.. You're sitting there like you've got a couple of matching knots. Should we not try that again?"

Huffing good-naturedly, the brunette slid closer as he reached fo his fallen pants. "I think its safe to say I won't be defeated by the discomfort of the situation, Lovely.. But I believe most strongly that sexual relations and tables are a less favorable mix than you anticipated." Lighting a cigarette, he snorted. "At least, the aftermath of sex and tables, that is."

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U - Unfit:

Smiling faintly, Lavi tugged the sheets higher over his still-sleeping lover, his hand lingering when his knuckles brushed the rise of his tanned shoulder. "It's not going to be enough, is it?" He murmured, careful not to disturb the restful figure. "I'll come here, we'll do this, and in the morning.." He laughed to himself, reaching over to take his hastily-discarded bandanna from its place on the night table. Shoving it carelessly into a pocket, he forced himself to stand. "Neither of us is suited for love, are we? I can't feel it, and you can't feel it for me.. But neither one of us is ready to say so. Maybe I should just-"

"Stay."

Sucking in a surprised breath, he stared at the quietly watching Noah, his own eye wide. "I didn't mean to wake you.."

The brunette nodded, sliding up to rest against the headboard as he retrieved his cigarettes and a match. Lighting the end, he shook out the flame. "You don't mean to do a lot of things, Lavi.. Like making my choices for me, I'm sure you've never meant to do that." He gestured at the other's fully dressed figure, ducking his ashes carelessly. "Did you intend to deprive me of a proper farewell also? You speak of not returning.."

The Exorcist shook his head, sinking heavily onto the edge of the mattress. "I wouldn't do that. Besides.." He smiled slowly, leaning towards the man's invitingly lifted arm. "Neither of us is suited to goodbyes, either."

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V - Violent:

"I don't want to hurt you, Lavi.. Can you really not wait at all?"

The redhead shivered at the darkness in the man's tone, shaking his head slowly. "I really can't, Tyki. It'll be fine, I trust you.. Both parts of you."

Pushing down the urge to rake his nails over the boy's bare skin, the Noah nodded jerkily. "Then.. Come here, Lovely. Let's see if you're more justified than foolhardy."

Climbing onto the bed, Lavi wondered if the man knew of his own faint doubt, but then the other's darkened hands were on him, and he knew that no matter what may happen, they both needed this.

Leaning into the brunette's feverish caresses, he shuddered at the barely-contained roughness, his breath ragged as sharp teeth pressed against the rapid beat of his pulse. "Please.. You'll drive us both crazy if you try to hold back like this. Just let go, Tyki."

The man made a sound halfway between a growl and a moan, his face buried against the redhead's throat as he pushed firmly into the space between his knees. Rocking his hips meaningfully, he lifted his head for a kiss that tasted of smoke and copper. "I don't want to let go, Lavi.. I want to hold on so fucking tight-"

Nodding in breathless understanding, the boy wrapped unsteady arms around his lover, his reply barely audible through the pounding of both their hearts. "Then do it.. I won't let go, either."

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W - Willpower:

Resisting the urge to scream, Lavi took a deep breath before speaking to his lover, his voice hushed in an effort to maintain civility. "I swear to God, I'm going to kill you when this is over."

Tyki laughed quietly, his arms shaking as he held himself perfectly still. "Of course you will, Lovely.. But before that you'll be begging and moaning-"

The redhead cut him off with a warning growl, his knees digging sharply into the older man's sides as he lifted his hips meaningfully. "I might, but I'd do that anyway. Right now, you're just trying to prove a point and you don't have to!" Gripping the other's shoulders roughly, he shook his head. "I really will be mad if you stop like that again.. Who cares if you can outlast me, Tyki? I sure as hell don't."

The older man smiled down at him, his hips rocking forward as he resumed his interrupted rhythm. "Of course you care, Lovely.. After all, it was you that brought the subject to light, wasn't it?"

Closing his eye with a muffled exclamation of pleasure, the redhead averted his face sharply, his reply spoken through close-gritted teeth. "You're taking it the wrong.. way! I said you didn't have as much patience as me because you're always in a hurry to start!"

Nibbling at his lover's arched throat, Tyki hummed quietly, his movements steady. "And you're always in a hurry to finish, aren't you? Maybe next time you'll think before you speak, yes?"

Left speechless by the man's low statement, Lavi decided that next time it would be him showing his lover a thing or two about staying power.

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X - Xerothermic:

Tyki raised an eyebrow at his grinning lover, his disbelief plain. "That cannot be an actual word, Lovely."

The Exorcist's smile widened inexorably, his voice laced with humor at the other's reaction. "It is so! You can look it up if you want."

Grumbling, the brunette snatched the small book from the boy, flipping to a spot near the end. After several moments of silence, he sighed. "Spell it."

Laughing, the redhead relaxed into his seat. "Sure. X-E-R-O-T-H-E-R-M-I-C. It means-"

The older man closed the book quickly, shaking his head. "Yes, yes.. Dry and hot. Very clever." Tossing the object back onto the tabletop, he stood. "I'll get you for this later, Lavi. I promise."

Watching the Noah push his loose undershorts over his hips, the boy nodded eagerly. "Oh, I really hope you will.. God, I think I love Scrabble.."

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Y - Yogurt:

Tyki hissed sharply at the sensation of cold against his reddened skin, his shoulders hunched despite his lover's gentle touch. "Lovely, are you absolutely certain that this will help..? It feels rather.. Disgusting, and the smell-"

Lavi hummed an affirmative, smearing another dallop of the slightly acrid substance over the man's sensitive flesh. "It really will, Tyki.. Trust me, I know all about these kind of things." Wrinkling his nose to avoid scratching at the peeling skin, he smiled at the brunette's faint shudder. "Next time you feel drowsy, say so.. This wouldn't have happened if you hadn't fallen asleep laying there."

The older man grumbled halfheartedly, struggling to ignore the slimy feel of the supposed remedy as it slid wetly along his spine. "I've never really thought about it, Lavi.. I don' t think I've even had a sunburn in recent memory." He shuddered as the boy slicked his ribs carefully, swallowing an unmanly noise as the heat of his skin warmed the substance to near-liquidity. "That's quite enough, dear.. Now, how about we do a bit of reading..? Perhaps we'll come across some other cure for sunburn."

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Z - Zero:

Lavi closed his eye with a slow exhalation, struggling to relax himself as best he could. "I'm starting to think you want me to be on top, Tyki.. You're taking too long."

The older man shook his head patiently, his lips leaving the boy's chest as he smiled. "Not at all, Lovely.. I merely thought it would be nice to take my time when I'm able." Resuming his upward progression, he stopped to lavish a kiss atop the redhead's bare collarbone, his tongue tracing along the sweat-salty skin. "You really don't enjoy it, even the slightest bit..? I won't be like this again, if it truly disturbs you, Lavi."

The mournful cast of his eyes made the Exorcist squirm guiltily, even though he knew the expression to be half-contrived. "It isn't that, I just.. I want you. I'm sorry that I'm not as patient as you."

Tyki nodded slowly, his hands warm on the other's skin as he pressed gently against the place his lover most wanted him to touch. Relishing the shaky arch against his fingertips, he bent to kiss him with a low moan. "I know you do, Lavi.. But once we start, there'll be no time to do anything but feel." Sliding a second finger alongside the first, he hissed at the redhead's low cry as he curled them purposefully within him. "If I take my time now, I can feel, see, taste.. I can have everything, and so can you. Isn't that worth a bit more waiting?"

The Exorcist panted rapidly, his hands sinking into dark hair as carefully as his shivers allowed. "It is, but... Not too much more." Tugging him upward insistantly, he nuzzled against the man's cheek fondly. "I'll try not to rush you all the time, ok? Let's just see if that helps."

Laughing quietly, Tyki nodded. "All right.. But tell me, on a scale of one to ten, how much more can you stand now, Lovely?"

Later, he realized that the answer to his question should have been evident. Eyeing the torn remnants of his shirt that were still knotted around the headboard posts, he also realized that his lover meant it when he said that he lacked patience.

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hurray..

I return...

2009-10-29T02:39:47Z

With another ficlette..

A Very Good Question

A DGM Lucky fic

By SisterWicked

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This is for a buddy, Voltairey, whom I had the occasion to lose a small bet to this past week.. Enjoy.

As usual, DO NOT ALERT/FAVE LIST THIS OR ANYTHING ELSE OF MINE WITHOUT COMMENTING. IT IS EXTREMELY RUDE AND WILL GET YOU A FLAME IN RESPONSE.

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Working holidays was, in Lavi's opinion, highly overrated.

Especially when said holiday just happened to be one of his personal favorites. Grumbling in mild irritation, he fished through the deep pockets of his jacket, pulling out a handful of assorted objects. Picking through scraps of paper, bits of string and seventeen cents in loose change, he selected a brightly-colored wrapper from the jumble, returning the rest to its place with a sigh.

Unwrapping his prize, he smiled briefly, leaning back against the so-far abandoned building that was his assignment for the night. "Probably another dead end.. But at least it fits the day."

Glancing over his shoulder, he shivered at the silent graveyard that surrounded him, wondering if there might be any truth to the reports that Innocence was kept within the mausoleum at his back. The Finders all swore that the door opened by itself at the stroke of midnight, revealing the dank interior alight with the bright green that signified the presence of God's matter.

"Shoulda brought more candy.." He mused, raising the last of his stash to his mouth. "Gonna be a long night if there's nothing in there.." Closing his eyes to better savor the sweetness of the treat, he jumped at the quiet sound of laughter just beside him. "Shit!"

"Such language.. Your friends would be so disappointed in you, Exorcist."

Fumbling for his hammer, the redhead whirled to face the familiar voice, glaring up at the dark-clothed figure angrily. "Just great, and here I thought all the weirdos would be busy handing out candy.. What the fuck are you wearing?"

The older man stepped further into the area lit by the boy's dim lantern, holding out his arms with a mocking grin. "Hm? It is the custom for tonight, yes? I could hardly be myself.." Ignoring the redhead's angry growl, he turned to the side, glancing down at himself seriously. "I think it rather suits me.. But then again, most things do."

Pointing squarely at the amused man's chest, Lavi cleared his throat roughly. "I don't know where you got it, but you take it off right this second. Take it off!"

Lifting an eyebrow, the brunette smirked. "It's only a jacket, boy.. Besides, where's your sense of humor? You must admit, it isn't something I'd normally wear." Patting himself thoughtfully, he pulled a crumpled pack of cigarettes from one silver-buttond pocket, lighting one with a contented hum. "Don't fret, its only an immitation.. Something Rhode found amusing. Your friend with the sword has one that's much the same, doesn't he? Personally I think I do it more justice, but perhaps I'm biased."

Ignoring his better judgement, Lavi stepped forward with a growl. "You look the same in that as you do everything else, Noah. Evil and crappy." Snorting at the other's indignant sound, he shook his head. "You should have picked something more your age anyway.. Like Dracula maybe. That's more fitting, seeing how he's just as ancient and evil as you are."

If not for the fact that the man could easily have pulled out his heart, his expression would almost have been humorous. "I most certainly am not ancient, boy. Your lack of an eye leaves some doubt to your opinion." Waving a hand at the building he hummed quietly. "Incidently, you're wasting your time if the Order sent you here about the Innocence in there.. I took it this afternoon. Rather nice timing, considering I beat you to it by no more than an hour."

Clenching his hands, the Exorcist scowled. "It's almost midnight, stupid. That's hardly 'an hour'." Watching the older man carefully, he backed toward the wall again, shifting his grip on the hammer. "If it's gone, why are you still here? Nothing better to do than hang out with the rest of the spooks?"

He would have continued, but the brunette cut him off with a snort. "I say an hour because it was that long before you stepped off your train, boy.. And I have things I could be doing, but I thought that perhaps tonight would avail me of a singularly interesting diversion from the norm." Following the redhead's gradual retreat, he halted when the boy's back met the junction of the building and the cemetary's surrounding wall. "Hm.. You've run out of room. Will you fight me, Exorcist? You can't possibly win.."

Lavi colored angrily at his dismissal of his fighting abilities, straightening his shoulders. "What else would I do, ask you to go trick-or-treating with me? Nobody'd give us anything after seeing how old you are." Expecting the man to retort with violence, he frowned when the other began digging through his pockets, his face incredulous as the brunette smirked, producing a handful of familiar objects after a short search. "You've got to be kidding me."

The Noah laughed aloud, holding out his hand almost gleefully. "Would you like some, boy? You seem to have dropped yours earlier.." He nodded at the hastily discarded sweet nearby, shaking his head in mock sadness. "Such a waste.. But you can have these, if you can remember the magic words..?"

Blinking dumbly, Lavi shook his head. "You really are crazy.. Do you actually think I'd take candy from a Noah? You probably poisoned it!"

The older man huffed at the accusation, selecting a piece at random and unwrapping it. "Suit yourself, then.. Perhaps I did, and I'll keel over right here, hm?" Popping the candy into his mouth, he sighed contentedly, chewing with exaggerated pleasure at the taste. "Mm. Too bad, I seem very much alive after all. If you're sure you aren't interested, I could let you spend the rest of your holiday cursing the lack of company.." He snorted at the redhead's almost mournful expression, noting his diminished ire. "Come, now.. What would one little piece hurt? It's very good.."

Scowling warily, the Exorcist raised one hand, ready to move in an instant if the other's intentions proved false. "Fine, if you'll leave after I take it." Motioning impatiently, he frowned. "Well? Give it to me."

The older man's smile widened as he stepped closer, his voice teasing. "Ah-ah.. That's not the way you're supposed to ask, is it? Remember your holiday manners, boy.."

Sighing, the redhead nodded. "Yeah, whatever.. Trick or treat..?"

Before he could bring his hand down, the brunette moved forward rapidly, his weight pressing the slighter form flush against the wall as he bent his head. "For being so obliging, you can have one of each." Ignoring the boy's shocked gasp, he covered his mouth with his own, the touch both demanding and gentle as his hand sank into the hair at the back of the Exorcist's head for leverage.

Nibbling at his lower lip, he licked briefly over the stinging skin before repeating the act deliberately, taking advantage of the boy's shocked sound to gain entry to his mouth. Exploring the faintly sweet surface of his teeth and tongue, he hummed in satisfaction at the redhead's shaky whimper, pulling away with a satisfied sigh. "Enjoy the rest of your holiday, Little One."

With that, he vanished, leaving the Exorcist slumped breathlessly against the wall.

Staring at the colorfully-wrapped candies in his palm, Lavi shook his head in bewildered confusion. "...Which one was which..?"

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Hee hee.. So it didn't really hit the needed 1500.. Any complaints?

X-posted everywhere for I am a promotions WHORE.

Regression Chapter 2

2009-10-06T02:24:29Z

Hooray.

Regression

A DGM Lucky Fic

By SisterWicked

Chapter 2

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Well, this is awkward.. I really, really wanted to have this done in time, but it looks like I'm a tad bit late.

Besides my slowness and failness, happy belated birthday, Booky. Enjoy the badness :P

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Lavi had always hated trying to sleep on trains.

The constant motion and clamor was too disturbing, especially after spending so many years rooming in with his teacher, who was surely the quietest person he'd ever known. Shifting in mild discomfort, he sighed at the low murmur of the passengers in the next car, the woman's voice scandalized and giggly as her male companion urged her to join him in something obviously more entertaining than a card game to pass the time.

The reminder of his own diversion left him momentarily red-faced, the seatspring digging into his back forgotten at the thought of what was to come. Though he knew the old man firmly believed that a Bookman had no need for affection, he'd always entertained the notion that the man was somehow less than totally unaffected by their long association, perhaps even fond of his young charge, but after the shocking claim leveled by his supposed enemy, he wondered if that were even remotely possible.

'If he gave a damn about me, how could he just take something like that and hide it from me? Erasing the memories that hurt me is one thing, but removing a happy memory..? He'd have to have taken the entire year, the mission, everything.. All that work, why would he have just let it go to waste..?'

Annoyed at the roundabout circling of his thoughts, he frowned. Bookman never did anything without a reason, so there had to be some excuse for so drastic a course of action. Closing his eye, he lifted a hand to the ever-present eyepatch, fingering the strap idly as he strove to find a comfortable position on the narrow seat. There was a slim chance that the Noah had been lying, that he'd gained access to certain bits of the older Bookman's mind, but that couldn't explain his own reaction to the man's story.

Biting his lip, he remembered how simple it had been to imagine the older man knowing him, sharing his secrets and even-

He shook his head at the rush of heat in his cheeks, his fingers pausing at the seam of his eye covering as he shivered. No, the Bookman's knowledge couldn't have made him react as he had, any more than it could have made the brunette's soft kisses strike so deep a chord in him. He'd learned early to force down every sign of his emerging self-awareness, from the giddy thrill at his progressing maturity to the furtive hints of appreciation for the physical charms of others, even the startling knowledge that male forms could be as attractive as female ones.

Tyki had brought those hidden things to light with no more than a saddened look and the gentlest of urgings, something that should have been near-impossible without some degree of leverage.. But why would he have gone to the trouble of creating such a story, with details that could have gone untended and ignored? The redhead massaged his temples tiredly, taking a look at the facts in as much a whole as he could.

The man knew things that could easily have been taken by force from someone who knew the boy well.

He also knew things that no one else could have told him.

The picture, while admittedly flimsy as proof of deep attachment, could have been faked.

The almost-memory of why it hung where it did could not.

He had no memory of the older man's touch, or the sensation of his kisses, but...

They'd been inexplicably welcome, astonishingly enough considering just who it was doing the touching, and though he should have been frightened and enraged at the man's boldness, there had been only a moment of hesitation on his part.

This was getting him nowhere.

Laughing at his frustration, he turned onto his stomach, wincing at the press of the thinly-covered springs against his skin. Pillowing his head atop one arm, he sighed. Did he really want to give away his future as a Bookman to keep the promise supposedly made by another person?

A fleeting image of the Noah's hopeless expression made him flinch, leaving him with little doubt that no matter how foolish a thing it was, he intended to see it through to the end. If the elder Bookman had sealed away his memories of the man, he meant to have every instant of them back, to sort through the tangled half-familiar and alien bits until something logical emerged. If the picture was clearly lain out to give proof to the other's story, the choice would make itself.

He couldn't remember wanting such a thing before, no matter how hard he tried, but the idea was considerably more appealing than what he now had, a life of gathering information and recording it for people who wouldn't even know his name..

His name.

The thought brought him half-upright with a muffled curse, his hands drawn into shaking fists.

Tyki had called him by the name he now used, not the one he remembered as being his before joining the order.

Bookman would have begun preparing him for his new persona as soon as the old one was to be done away with, and no one but he and his apprentice could have known what and who he would be afterwards.

When had he become Lavi?

Stiffening faintly, he realized that he couldn't recall. Throwing himself into the techniques learned over a decade of serious training, he was stunned when the attempt brought only a hazy memory of a boatride through a darkened tunnel, and his teacher resorting to an off-cast name to catch his attention.

If they'd made preparations to enter the Black Order, been tested to prove they could conform to Innocence.. He would have known who 'Lavi' was. He would have taken days to memorize every aspect of who the name belonged to, from his hobbies to his affectations. No part of the persona's life would have been overlooked.

He hadn't known himself.

Tyki had told the truth.

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He spent the rest of the trip mulling over his belated discovery, half curious and half enraged. The time he'd lost was a source of endless hows and whys, but the thought that Bookman had made such a glaring mistake..

Whatever the reason, the fact that his teacher was not infallible left him with a disturbing question. If he'd acted in haste once, how many other times had he been wrong? Had the things he'd taught his apprentice likewise been compromised by the older man's own personality?

Lavi forced himself to be objective in his judgements, but did the much older and more experienced man have his own moments of doubt? He showed no outward signs of such a thing, but after taking the current situation into account.. The Exorcist sighed at the now doubled burden of his thoughts, very nearly missing the conductor's faint knock to announce their impending arrival at his stop. Thanking the man distractedly, he gathered his few belongings, making his way toward the front of the car.

Standing on the station platform, he waited impatiently as his Finder asked the ticket clerk to summon a carriage. The man was nice enough, but he had the unfortunate affliction of feeling the need to fill every moment of silence with talk, usually about something offensive. At the moment, he seemed to have found a kindred spirit in the bored desk worker, the sound of their laughter grating on the Exorcist's nerves as a few stray words caught his attention.

"..must be fucking queers. I mean, who else would hole themselves up in a place like that, knowing there aren't any goodlooking women there at all? I go out every chance I get, but they don't.. Like this one, he doesn't do anything but read and flirt with everything that walks, it's obviously a cover."

Lavi braced himself, anticipating the rush of his temper at the man's crass statement, but instead there was only a moment of irritation at his gossip. Lifting a hand to the still-tender mark at his throat, he snorted.

"If you're done fantasizing about my sex life, could we go? I think the guys are planning an underwear party tonight."

The two stared at him in disbelieving shock, the Finder turning an unattractive shade of puce before replying. "The carriage isn't due for another half hour, Exorcist-san."

The redhead gestured at the thinning fog absently. "It would take that and fifteen minutes to walk to Headquarters.. How about you just stay here with your buddy and I'll catch you later? Don't worry, I'll turn in the report myself, and I'll be sure to tell Komui that you think his sister's a hag while I'm at it."

Smirking at his horrified expression, the Exorcist lifted his suitcase, making his way to the platform edge with a slightly more relaxed outlook on his arrival. Perhaps he could hold his temper with the old man, if he hadn't killed his overly mouth Finder. Descending the steps, he followed the walkway to the street, heading in the direction of the Order's London Branch.

XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxX

Though he knew there would be questions concerning his early return to Headquarters, he hadn't expected someone to be waiting for him at the door, the Gatekeeper's visible unease revealing the person to be none other than Allen Walker.

Wincing slightly, the redhead slowed his approach, hoping to give the impression of weariness. Smiling at the younger boy's enthusiastic wave, he wondered how pleased the other Exorcist would be once the truth came to light. After all, the man he.. Loved..? Had torn the Innocence from Allen's body in the not-too-distant past, leaving him for dead with a seeping hole chewed through his very heart.

"Been waiting long?" He hoped his voice sounded as tired as he wished it to, but the other's smile never faltered as he shook his head.

"Not really, maybe a half hour." Reaching for the redhead's travel case, the British boy tipped his head toward the waiting Gatekeeper. "It makes him nervous, I think.. But I'm not going to laugh until he lets me back in."

Stifling a snicker at the other's momentary lapse into sadism, Lavi smiled up at the stone guardian. "Open says me? I'd like to get in before the Apocalypse, if you could.." The door opened smoothly on it's well-worn hinges, allowing the two to enter before it swung shut with a resounding bang that never failed to resemble the closing of some ancient tomb. Glancing down at his still-smiling companion, the redhead took note of the carefully-veiled question in his expression.

"Something on your mind, Moyashi-chan?" He grinned at the shorter boy's mild frown at the nickname, crossing the entryway with exaggerated patience. "The old man says I have an answer for everything, so ask away."

Motioning to an unoccupied bench near the rear door, Allen waited for the older boy to sit, joining him after setting aside the other's luggage. "Was there a problem with the mission? The Finder? You don't look like you're hurt, but you came up alone.. He didn't get hurt, did he? I hate that, because sometimes you can't take care of them and they get in the way.."

The British Exorcist winced at his own rambling, waving a hand. "I don't mean to pry, I just wondered if everything was all right.. You've never rushed back this early, so I thought maybe something bad had happened."

Leaning against the bench's low back, Lavi shook his head. "Its all right. I've been asking myself a lot of question lately."

Seeing the boy's confused look, he sighed. "Have you ever been in love, Allen? I mean, really, really in love?"

The younger Exorcist blinked at the question, his eyes wide as he shook his head silently.

Lavi smiled faintly, expecting the answer. "I was. Before I came here." He straightened, tipping his head back to rest against the wall. "And.. I think I still am. I don't know what's gonna happen now, but I'm here to tell the old man to let me go." Hearing the other's quick breath, he glanced at him from the corner of his eye. "Go ahead and ask.. But you won't like the answer."

The boy hummed curiously, his head tilted in a way that made him resemble something small and furry. "Is it... Someone I know? Someone here..? Are they leaving too?"

Laughing quietly, Lavi shook his head. "It's someone we all know, but not from here. If I tell you, it'll probably be the last thing I get to say to you as a friend." Steeling himself, he took a breath to continue. "It's-"

"One of our enemies. The Order's enemies. Which one is it, then?"

Stunned at the lack of hostility in the boy's tone, Lavi sat up with a surprised noise, his eye wide. "How-"

Allen smiled knowingly, shaking his head. "Because any other time you'd be happy. If it were someone else, you'd have told everyone." He watched the older boy fidget, sighing. "If I had more time, I could probably even figure out who. You like the older type, right? And it wouldn't be someone plain or regular, you wouldn't give up your life here for anything but a completely outstanding person." Laughing suddenly, he leaned close. "Answer me one question before I guess. It's a man, isn't it?"

Still astonished at the boy's apparent approval, he nodded dumbly, his mouth suddenly dry as the white-haired Exorcist snorted.

"Then it's simple. The one you're leaving for is Tyki Mikk. I don't blame you for keeping it a secret, but how did you manage it, Lavi? It's been close to three years since you came here.."

Shaking his head rapidly, the redhead lowered his voice. "I didn't! I didn't even remember until I saw him while I was out-" Taking a breath, he forced himself to relax. "Bookman took my memories, Allen. A whole year of them, and I didn't even know.. I'm here to make him give them back. I couldn't believe it when Tyki started telling me about what we.." He paused, gesturing helplessly. "You think I'm stupid, don't you? To take his word for it and give everything away."

For a long minute, the smaller boy was silent, his expression unreadable. At last, he smiled. "You're a lot of things, Lavi, but stupid isn't one of them. If you really believe him, then you're doing the right thing." Frowning suddenly, he caught the redhead's arm tightly. "No one else knows, right? Do you know where he'll be, after you leave? I've got a pretty strong hunch that the higher ups aren't going to take this very well.. Bookman's not due back til this evening, do you have your things ready?"

Surprised, Lavi shook his head. "No, I didn't think there would be time to take anything with me.. I figured the same thing, and it's hard to run with a room full of stuff." Allen scowled faintly, tugging his arm as he rose from his seat.

"I'll help you get the important things ready. You shouldn't have to leave everything behind, Lavi." Pulling the taller boy along behind him, he led the way to the stairs, glancing around quickly before continuing. "I can't go with you, but I'll do everything I can to help you get out safely.. Komui-san can probably make sure you won't be followed right away, too." Halting at the top of the stairs, he sighed. "Don't let them take your Innocence, either. Keep it in case you have to fight-"

Lavi shook his head in alarm, pulling his arm free. "If I take it, they'll never leave us alone, you know that! It hurts Tyki to be near it, too." Stilling the other's protest with a look, he pressed on. "Part of the reason I'm happy to go is there won't be anymore fighting, Allen."

The younger boy scowled, his jaw set stubbornly. "Komui-san told me that Innocence won't conform to another user if it's original accommodator is still alive, Lavi. If you aren't a Bookman, they'll treat you just like the other Exorcists.. As long as there's an Innocence that reacts to you, they'll be trying to force you back." He winced at the redhead's startled curse. "They might use you to get to him, too.. What will you do, if they send someone after you and you can't fight? He could lose control and kill them, do you want that?"

The older boy paled, swallowing heavily. "What if its you, Allen? Or Yuu.. They'd send someone strong enough to fight a Noah once they knew, and there aren't many that could do that." Clenching his hands, he growled in annoyance. "I'm going to put him in danger, aren't I? Because I'm that fucking selfish.."

"So is he."

The younger boy's words brought him to a halt, his eye wide. "What? No, he didn't-"

Allen waved a hand briskly, his face serious. "You said you didn't know. He came after you, didn't he? He could have left it alone, but he wanted to have you back." Smiling faintly, he shook his head. "It's supposed to be like that, I think.. That's probably why I haven't been in love, I'm just not selfish enough." For a moment, he almost looked wistful, but the expression passed as he continued. "Make it worth it, Lavi. If you're going to do this, do it with everything you've got."

The redhead nodded firmly, pushing down his lingering unease. "Oh, I'm going to. He waited this long, so I kinda owe it to him to make a good attempt, don't I?" He forced a smile, ignoring his remaining doubts. "For me, too. It wouldn't be right to treat it like a fling, not when I'm giving up the life I made here.. I think I'll miss having friends, though."

The smaller boy stiffened abruptly, his gaze so angry that Lavi thought he might actually strike him. "Miss it? Why would you miss it if you aren't losing it? I'll still be your friend, Lavi! If anyone stops caring about you because of this, they weren't your friend in the first place!" He raised his head to stare the taller Exorcist full in the face, his eyes narrowed in anger. "I don't think it matters who you love, Lavi. There isn't one person here that wants to spend the rest of their life alone, fighting and killing every day! If you want something better for yourself, you've the same right as anyone else to have it. Isn't that right, Kanda?"

He glared at a spot just beyond the redhead's shoulder, his eyebrows drawn challengingly even as the older boy whipped around with a startled curse.

"Yuu-chan? Um, hey, how's it going?" He winced at the too-eager pitch of his voice, preparing to move at the slightest deepening of the other boy's frown. "Wow, this is a little awkward.."

The samurai shook his head in disgust, ignoring the redhead's faltering grin. "Moyashi, are you trying to make the rabbit even stupider? We don't need you to start teaching sensitivity classes." Glaring from one to the other, he snorted. "So, you're deserting. Any reason I shouldn't kick your sorry ass and drag you down to our idiot supervisor's office?"

Huffing belligerently, the white haired boy took a step forward. "Because it'll be two on one if you try. If you eavesdropped for the whole conversation, you should know he's got a good reason to leave." Ignoring the other's dismissive gesture, he moved closer. "If he's your friend, you should want him to be happy. Don't give me that look, either. If he isn't, he's the closest thing you have to one."

The older Exorcist glared at him in annoyance, ignoring the redhaired source of their argument. "There's no good reason to shirk your duty, Moyashi. He's not like the other people here, but that's no excuse to sneak away when there's work to be done." Turning to look at the boy in question, he chuckled darkly. "Do you think you're my friend, Lavi? I've never heard of a friend who would abandon their job for a quick roll in the hay-"

Before he could continue, the redhead strode forward with a thunderous scowl, his hands clenched at his sides in readiness for battle. "Don't go there, Yuu. I've spent my whole life working for everyone else, and it got me nowhere! The one person I trusted more than any of you stole a part of my life, and took away a piece of someone else's with it! For what? History? We aren't supposed to interfere with anything, but what else could you call that? If he did it once, who knows how many other things went wrong without me knowing?" He faced the samurai defiantly, holding his place despite the warningly narrowed eyes.

"I never chose this. If Linali wanted to leave, would you be so hateful of her? She was forced, too." Gesturing at the other's sheathed weapon, he shook his head. "You can put Mugen away, anytime you want to. What about the ones who can't? Look at Allen, and Linali now! They won't ever be able to do that, they can't do anything but carry the burden until they die." Sighing loudly, he tugged his own Innocence free of it's holster, brandishing the small form before the still frowning Asian.

"How stupid would I look, letting this rule my life, Yuu? It doesn't think, or feel.. It doesn't care who it hits. I used to be like that, too. Not anymore." Replacing the hammer carefully, he laughed. "It's the damnedest thing, too. Part of the reason I don't feel guilty for wanting a life of my own is you. You're trapped here just like everyone else, but no one tells you how to live, do they? I respected you for that, being your own person even if you were dictated to twenty-four seven."

Shrugging, he stepped back toward the younger Exorcist, motioning to the hall. "Let's just go, Allen. Something else I admired about Yuu was how hard he held onto what he thought was right.. He'll get over it or he won't, I can't make him do anything and neither can you." Firming his resolve, he turned his back on the other boy, walking away without waiting to see if the British Exorcist had followed.

XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxX

After carefully deciding what to take and what could be left, Lavi slumped tiredly onto his bed. Likewise, the white haired Exorcist joined him, his expression faintly amused.

"You have a lot of... stuff, Lavi. I'm afraid to even ask what some of it is." Gesturing at the two small travel cases nearby, he smiled. "At least you have clothes and some other things to take with you, though. I won't ask where you're going from here, but try to find a way to keep in touch, ok? Everyone's going to miss having you around to cheer us up."

Lavi grinned, nodding. "I will. It might be a while, but I'll see what I can work out." Standing, he stretched until his back popped audibly, grimacing. "Ugh.. I really hate trains. Besides that, thanks. You'll explain to the people who matter, won't you? I don't want to start any trouble until I'm long gone-"

He froze at the quiet click of the door latch, his eye widening at the unexpected appearance of his soon to be former master. Following his line of sight, Allen also rose, his stance slightly wary as he moved just far enough to one side to be of help, should things not go as well as he hoped they would.

The old man glanced at him dismissively, regarding the redhead with a stern look. "Where are you going, Lavi? There's no mission assigned to you, yet you seem to be prepared for a journey of some distance." Taking in the anxious posture and expression of his pupil, he frowned. "Explain yourself, at once."

Shaking off his nerves, the Exorcist straightened. "I'm not the one who needs to explain. Why did you tamper with me?" Swallowing heavily, he fought to keep his voice too low to carry through the echoing stone, despite his growing anger at the older man's serene face. "You took something very important from me, and I want it back before I go. Give me back the year that you stole from me, Bookman."

The Chinese Exorcist's eyes hardened noticeably, his mouth thinning into a frown. "Stole, you say? I've taken nothing that you needed, Apprentice." Waving a hand at the watching Allen, he snorted. "The things you would discuss have no place in the workings of the Order. Have you forgotten that we never share the secrets we've learned, Lavi?"

Stiffening, Lavi snorted angrily. "We aren't supposed to meddle in people's lives, either! You don't mind a little when it suits you, though, do you? It wasn't just me, you took something from Tyki, too! All this damn time, he's been waiting for me and I never knew! It doesn't matter now, because he found me." Nodding shortly, he pointed at the waiting suitcases. "He told me what happened, and its too convenient to be a lie! He knows things that no one else could have told him, and I remember parts of it now! You can't force me to stay here anymore, I won't work with a person that I can't trust with my own mind. For once in your life, have a fucking heart. Give me back my memories."

The older man drew himself up as if the boy had struck him, his face stern. "You speak of it as if you were forced, Lavi. Nothing was taken that you wished to keep." He folded his arms, his hands concealed within the voluminous sleeves of his coat. "When you asked to have your mind closed to him, I warned you that such a thing is an imperfect solution."

Growling angrily, the redhead clenched his hands into fists. "That's a lie! I would never have asked for that, we were-"

Bookman shook his head implacably, for the first time expressing some hint of regret. "You were young, and foolish. You doubted your ability to keep yourself above partiality on that man's behalf. I also believed it to be unlikely." Walking toward the spluttering redhead, he met the boy's narrowed eye calmly. "You became immersed in your assignment, Lavi. You asked for release, and I granted it despite my reservations. Would you have it undone, then? I told you that the consequences would be most... Unpleasant." Scowling at the boy's obvious confusion, he shook his head. "Idiot boy.. To restore one such memory is to restore all things closed by the same technique. You would remember everything you've forgotten."

Nodding at the redhead's pale face, he sighed. "This is why I told you to be certain, Lavi. Do you still wish to know?"

Swallowing roughly, the Exorcist nodded, his jaw set in determination. "I have to. Please, Gra- Bookman, he's waiting for me." Glancing at the confused Allen, he smiled faintly. "I don't care if he stays, just.. Get it over with."

The elder straightened, inclining his head. "As you wish. Come closer, Lavi.. This is a thing meant to be kept secret." Waiting for the other to bend his head, he began to speak, the words too soft to carry beyond the raptly listening redhead. The language was unmistakably that of the Bookman clan, but a dialect far older and more formal than the two conversed in amongst themselves.

At first there was only a momentary dizziness, and the younger boy shook his head to clear the building sense of unease that settled over him. Closing his eye, he swayed unsteadily as the dizziness became outright disorientation, the quiet sounds of the building around him fading into the background as the older Bookman's voice commanded his full attention despite the surge of almost-nausea brought on by his low words.

As the Chinese man continued to speak, Lavi became aware of an outward press against the boundary of his recollections, a feeling not unlike a dam waiting to burst under an unexpected torrent. When the older Exorcist halted his recitation, Lavi took a choked breath, stunned by the lancet of pain that blossomed behind his temples.

The sensation of wrongness grew steadily more profound, and with a muffled curse he sank to one knee, his eye widening as long-buried images took shape in luridly brilliant detail. Screaming, he clutched his head as the scenes filled his mind, the remembered stench of blood and scorched metal leaving him breathless even as the memory deepened into a nightmare of flames, rent bodies and a child's terror.

Starting forward quickly, Allen stilled at the older man's curt wave. "Do not interfere. He must bear it, or go mad." Shaking his head, he turned to the door, crossing the room with deliberate steps. "I will inform the Supervisor that Lavi is no longer in my charge. You would do well to see him off as quickly and quietly as possible, when he comes to.. Good Evening, Mr. Walker." Without a second look at his crouched apprentice, he left, closing the door firmly behind him.

At a loss, Allen stared from the door to the fallen Exorcist, his eyes wide as the boy's cries became ragged, his hands still buried in his hair as he drew himself into a ball. Mentally raging at the apparent desertion of the older man, he knelt beside his now-sobbing friend, carefully wrapping him in a tight hug. Urging him to relax, he murmured comfortingly, wondering what the older boy had remembered that would reduce him to such a state.

Feeling him stiffen, he drew back just in time to avoid an unfortunate collision with the redhead's flushed face, his arms dropping to his sides as he sat back awkwardly. "Oh, are you all right now..? I didn't mean to.." Breaking off, he frowned at the other's dazed expression, waving a hand in front of his face. "Lavi? What is it?"

The older boy shook his head slowly, swiping at his dampened cheeks. "I did it." He muttered woodenly, leaning away from the other Exorcist. "They- My family died because of me."

XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxX

Hooray. Final chapters to follow soon. As always, do not fave/alert list me without commenting first, or I'll send you a rather nasty PM. Happy birthday, Booky!!

Enjoy!

AssHat Productions

2009-10-01T00:21:37Z

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Second kink..

2009-08-23T02:57:24Z

Second shortfic for the LJ/DW Kink!Bingo.. Prompt: Public Sex.
Enjoy!

Exposure

A DGM Lucky fic

By SisterWicked

********************************

Lavi decided that he strongly disliked the flavor of his jacket sleeve.

Gasping thickly against the heavy material, he pressed awkwardly back against the fingers sunk palm deep inside him, arousal and embarrassment warring for dominance as he moaned. "Hurry up, someone might- Fuck!"

The older man laughed wickedly, curling his fingers purposefully against the place that brought the Exorcist almost to his tiptoes with a muffled cry of pleasure. "Oh, I daresay someone will, Lavi.. Shouldn't you be quieter if you don't wish to draw attention to yourself?"

Despite his admonition, he repeated the movement steadily, his smirk widening with every half-stifled sound from the shivering redhead. "It's your own fault, you know.. You were the one who suggested 'just finding an alley or something' if I couldn't wait to get you home."

The Exorcist growled in frustration, shaking his head. "I didn't think you'd really take me seriously, damn it! There are people right over there on the street, what are you going to do if someone looks in here?"

Tyki hummed curiously, leaning in to nibble at the boy's arched throat. "Well, I could hardly offer them refreshments, Lovely.. Perhaps they would be content to watch?" Rummaging through his pockets, he produced a slim tube, holding it where the astonished redhead could see. "I knew there was a reason to keep this with me.. Do you really not want it, Lavi?"

Gritting his teeth in mortification, the Exorcist nodded rapidly, his eye closed as his blush deepened. "You know I do! Stop playing games and get on with it, before we really do get caught!" His hands clenched into fists at the man's soft chuckle, his cheeks almost painfully hot as he panted for breath. "Please..? You know I hate it when you tease.."

The brunette sighed, withdrawing his hand. "Of course, you're still so impatient.. But in this particular situation, you may be right. Brace yourself, Lovely." Squeezing a liberal amount of the slippery substance into his hand, he worked his pants open, coating himself thoroughly with a low hiss at the coolness.

Taking a firm hold on the boy's unclothed hips, he urged his legs apart as far as his lowered pants would allow, rocking forward to sheath himself inside the Exorcist with a rough exhalation. "Oh, yes.."

Feeling the redhead relax faintly, he smiled, pulling back slightly before burying himself again. Repeating the movement more forcefully, he growled at the boy's smothered cries, his clean hand lifting to wind into his hair. Tugging gently, he urged the other's face away from his steadying arm, bending to press his smiling mouth to the Exorcist's nape. "You're so hot, Lavi.. Is it because someone might see?"

Biting his lip almost to the point of drawing blood, the Exorcist shook his head jerkily, not trusting his voice.

Increasing his pace slightly, the older man licked along the shell of the boy's ear, his own voice heavy with sensation. "Are you frightened, Lovely..? I believe it excites you." Nipping at the soft skin, he urged the redhead flush against the wall, mindful of his partial nudity and the unyielding stone. "I don't think I would mind it nearly so much, having someone see me claiming what's mine.."

The Exorcist made a sound somewhere between a whimper and a moan, his spine arching as he thrust his hips back into the other's insistant movements. "Please..! I don't-" He gasped at the brunette's roughening hold, his eye closed as he fought to make sense. "If someone.. We'd have to stop.. Please hurry!"

Releasing the boy's hair, Tyki slipped an arm between his chest and the wall, his hand lowering to curl around the physical proof of his lover's urgency. "Well.. We certainly can't have that, now can we? Right now..?"

The redhead nodded so sharply that the older man risked a sore nose by remaining in place. "Yes! I want it, please make me..!" He forced himself to quieten, bucking into the Noah's hand and hips with equal fervor. "You're the same, Tyki.. S'all about the risk." Halfturning his face toward the other, he laughed breathlessly. "Go on, then.. Try to make me scream."

The Noah smiled viciously, his hand tightening as his hips snapped forward. "As you wish, Lovely.. There's time for slow and steady at home, yes?"

The Exorcist's only reply was a strangled exclamation of pleasure, his motions quick and needy as he panted nonsensical encouragements that made the older man acutely aware of his own desire for completion. Feeling the boy's muscles stiffen convulsively, he moaned, burying himself to the hilt inside the quivering heat of him, his teeth closing hard on the redhead's shoulder as he rode out the blissful waves of his orgasm.

Despite the incredible rush of sensation, Lavi remained near-silent, the only sign of his release a shaken mewl that reached no further than his gasping lover's ears. Sagging against the wall, he laughed giddily, blinking to clear his vision as he shook his head. "God.. Nice as that was, let's keep it behind closed doors from now on, eh?"

The brunette hummed in agreement, kissing the raised marks left by his teeth as he shifted. Allowing their bodies to part, he pulled a handkerchief from his pocket, wiping his hand with a slight grimace. "Perhaps it wasn't as well thought out as it seemed at the time.. But well worth the effort. Hold still, Lavi.." Folding the thin cloth in half, he used the cleaner side to dab at the boy's exposed thighs, drawing the material upward to the cleft of his behind with gentle strokes.

Satisfied with his efforts, he tended to his own skin, frowning at the obviously ruined material when he finished. Adjusting his clothing, he helped the boy with his own, turning him around for a smiling kiss. Leaning back, he inclined his head toward the street, raising a questioning eyebrow. "Shall we go, Lovely..? A bath sounds absolutely divine at the moment.."

The redhead nodded with a soft laugh, taking the older man's free hand. "Feel like conserving water? Sharing is a very good thing.."

Leading the Exorcist to the end of the alley, Tyki dropped his unusable handkerchief into a trash bin, glancing over his lover's flushed face. "It is rather pleasant to have someone to wash your back.. My goodness, you look positively debauched, Lavi."

Sidestepping the boy's indignant swat, he laughed. "Now, now.. Don't draw attention to yourself."

Lavi grumbled halfheartedly, shaking his head. "Well, it's your fault if I do.. And you look pretty messy yourself, Mr. Exibitionist." Starting in the direction of their home, he snickered. "You missed a spot, by the way.. Right beside your zipper." Laughing at the man's surprised hum, he quickened his steps. "C'mon, if we hurry, maybe no one will notice. If you're lucky. And if they're blind."

Scowling at the redhead's amusement, Tyki allowed himself to be led, wondering if the Exorcist would also be amused at the clear outline of a helping hand on the backside of his own pants. Risking the other's wrath, he snorted softly. "Perhaps we'll both be lucky."

********************************

Well, that's two.. hooray again.

Bingo entry...

2009-08-09T20:16:26Z

First submission for the kink!bingo on LJ/DW..
Rating: M.
Pairing: Lucky, of course.
Kink: Film/Photography

Likeness

A DGM Lucky fic

By SisterWicked

***************************

"...How much longer? It's cold in here.."

The brunette glanced quickly at his furiously blushing lover, amused at his quiet grumbling. "It's no cooler than it ever was, Lavi.. And pardon my saying so, but you're far too red to be cold." He quickly dodged a pillow meant for his head, laughing. "Surely you aren't camera shy?"

The redhead scowled at him from his place atop the black-covered bed. "You never told me why we're doing this, you know. What do you need pictures for, when you see me every day?"

Tyki smirked, bending to check the focus and angle of the lens, minutely adjusting the camera's placement. "Why does one need pictures at all, Lovely? Let's just say it's for my.. personal enjoyment, hm?" Straightening, he nodded in satisfaction. "There we are.. Give us a smile, Lavi."

Immediately, the boy's knees drew up close to his body, his hands crossing defensively across his bare chest. "Oh, God.. You're really serious! Where would you even hang a picture like that, the foyer? No way."

The older man sighed patiently, waving a hand at the boy's flushed figure. "I hardly think I'd hang it anywhere.. I told you, it would only be for me." He affected an air of injured dignity, shaking his head. "Is it too much to ask, Lavi? I'd let you take one of me, if you wanted it.."

The redhead winced, then forced down the faint sense of guilt. "Of course you would, you're the pervert who wants to take naked pictures of people in the first place!"

Tyki shook his head with a genuine smile, beckoning the Exorcist closer. "Not people, Lovely.. Just you." Reaching forward, he stroked the boy's bare side lingeringly. "And why wouldn't I? You're exactly as I call you, especially like this.." He trailed his fingers slowly over the other's hip and thigh, humming to himself. "I'm the only one who ever sees you this way, without the cumbersome trappings and adornments that only detract from your natural comeliness."

He paused at the point of the boy's bent knee, regarding him seriously. "Would you deny me such a small reminder, Lavi? Believe me, you've nothing to be ashamed of.." He supressed a chuckle at the Exorcist's renewed blush, raking his eyes over the lightly tanned expanse of his skin. "Should I have said please?"

Slumping in defeat, Lavi shook his head. "All right, but just one. And nobody will ever see it. Right, Tyki?"

The man nodded gleefully, stepping back with an affirmative. "Absolutely. Now, would you prefer the front or the back?" Taking hold of his shirtfront, he worked the buttons through their holes deftly. Shrugging the garment off, he laughed at the boy's surprised expression. "Suddenly it's rather warm in here.. Besides that, I doubt you'll want to be the only unclothed person in the bedroom, yes?"

Raising an eyebrow, the Exorcist turned to face the headboard, glancing backward over one shoulder. "This is just fine. Now, hurry up before I change my mind."

The brunette hummed in agreement, taking a last glimpse through the viewfinder. "Very fine indeed.. No talking now, it takes ten seconds." Waiting for the boy to settle himself, he pulled the cap from the lens barrel, his smile widening at the redhead's vivid blush. "Ten.. Nine.. Eight.. Seven.."

Lavi fought down the urge to cover himself, his breathing hitched at the openly lustful expression on his lover's face. The man's eyes were hungry in a way that made him wonder if it was the suggestive pose or the situation that dominated his reaction, and he was astonished to find that he didn't really care which it was. What mattered was the catch in the other's voice as he counted, and the rapidly shifting color of his heavy gaze, along with the barely-noticeable unsteadyness of the hand that still held the thick lens cover.

"Two.. One. Just a moment.." Carefully replacing the lens cap, the Noah cleared his throat, smiling up at the relieved Exorcist. "Well, with that out of the way.."

Measuring his reaction closely, Lavi smiled in return. "Should I stay like this, since you like it so much..? Don't bother with the lights, maybe you won't feel the need for pictures if you can see what you're doing.."

The older man nodded rapidly, phasing his remaining clothing through his body with a low laugh. "Perhaps.. Let's see if we can do something about the temperature, hm?"

***************************

Well, That's one.. Hopefully the other four will be much less FAIL.

Yey.

Drabbles..

2009-07-28T20:40:31Z

Wow, I'm so productive..

Drabble Collection

By SisterWicked

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#01 - Kiss

No matter how many times he felt the older man's lips against his own, Lavi was constantly amazed that such a simple act could bring about so many emotions.

#02 - Chocolate:

Lapping eagerly at the warm brown liquid encircling his lover's navel, Tyki conceded that perhaps he harbored a secret sweet tooth.

#03 - Telephone:

Feeling the faint jostle of his golem, Lavi quickly located an unocupied phone. "Hello?"

"Good Evening, Lovely.. I trust you're well?"

For a moment, he was stunned at the older man's voice on the line, but decided that something as simple as obtaining a contact number really wouldn't have been so difficult.

"I'm all right, but I don't know if I can get back by tonight.."

The brunette hummed quietly, the sound faintly tinged with humor.
"Really? What a shame.. I was just getting ready for dinner." There was a brief pause, during which the Exorcist clearly heard the sound of a zipper sliding along it's track.

"...Set me a place."

#04 - Ears:

Eyeing the Exorcist's fiercely blushing face, Tyki stroked a finger along the source of his embarassment. "I must say, when that fool scientist gets something right, he really gets it right.. Is there a matching tail?"

#05 - Weakness:

Tyki wondered if the softly snoring redhead at his side would understand the concept of an Achilles' Heel. Thinking of the boy's already guilt-laden conscience, he decided it was best to keep such thoughts to himself.

#06 - Tears

Lavi had never mourned the loss of his eye, until there were too many sorrows to shed with only one.

#07 - Taste

"So, how it is, Lovely?"

The boy swallowed heavily, wincing. "Same as always.. Bitter, sorta slimy.. But I can stand it because its yours."

Smirking faintly, Tyki nodded. "If love makes you eat your bell peppers, then maybe I should do all the cooking, hm?"

#08 - Blood:

Though it had never bothered him before, Lavi could say with all honesty that he was truly horrified at the red fluid seeping from his lover's sliced fingers, the coppery scent making him dizzy with unreasoning hatred for the shattered cup that had caused the wound.

#09 - Sickness:

Sighing in annoyance, Tyki allowed his frowning lover to slide the thin glass tube into his mouth for what seemed to be the hundredth time. Waiting impatiently for him to remove the instrument, he huffed. "Must you do that, Lovely..? We both know I won't die from a simple cold."

The boy scowled down at his slightly reddened face, shaking his head. "Yeah, and we both know that you can't catch a cold either." Biting his lip, he tugged the man's blanket higher along his chest. "Tell you what.. If you're not better by tonight, I'll help you take a nice cool spongebath, 'kay?"

Smirking wickedly the brunette nodded. "Perhaps I'll take a sudden turn for the worse.."

#10 - Confusion:

Tyki, Lavi and Allen are sitting at a bar, drinking and waiting for the bill. The bartender comes up and says "Thanks
for your patience, did you want the checks seperate? Its no trouble really, and then you know its divided fairly. If you get your money ready, it'll just take a minute." Allen says "What's money?" Lavi says "What's patience?" and Tyki says
"What's no?"

#11 - Smile

Lavi sighed resignedly at the questioning tilt of his companion's head, knowing that his ultimate defeat would be sure to follow the motion of his lips as they began to curve upward.

#12 - Innocence

Watching his lover's eyes widen in joyous wonder at the sound of his name spoken in a child's piping voice, Lavi could do nothing to stem the thought that perhaps the other still possessed some small piece of the man that he had once been.

#13 - Hero

After seeing his young lover face hoardes of Akuma, the mind games of his adopted neice and the interloping pieces of his previous selves, Tyki wondered why the careful bandaging of a scraped knee seemed so much more profound.

#14 - Memory

As Lavi grew closer and closer to believing the whispers in his head, he found himself recalling the first time his lover had touched him, and for an instant he wondered if his desperate longing had always been so thinly covered by false aversion.

#15 - Red

Waking up to a faceful of coppery-hued hair should have been most unpleasant, he thought, but in light of his lover's rather close proximity, he decided that he could bear with the tickling for just a little longer.

#16 - Temptation

Glancing from a low-slung waistband to a halfbuttoned shirt, Tyki wondered if his young lover realised that his choice of sleeping attire was a walking billboard for debauchery.

#17 - Promise

Looking from his lover's determined face to that of the white-haired boy opposite him, Tyki realized that there was much more at stake than a simple conflict of arms; for herein lay a test of convictions, and the fine line between loyalty and a promise blurred quickly under the weight of a choice that had yet to be made.

#18 - Wait

Tyki had thought himself incapable of patience, but the days spent lingering by the sleeping form of his lover had shown him that time had no meaning when one was lost in misery.
#19 - Share

While sitting beneath the sheltering canopy of an ancient tree, Tyki secretly believed that the sudden cloudburst had been carefully orchestrated by a higher power, perhaps one who also thought that blankets were better suited to sharing than picnicking.

#20 - Solitary

Tyki had never realized just how much he depended on his lover's presence, until he woke up alone for the seventh day in a row and knew that the hospital had no visiting hours on Sunday.

#21 - Beginning

Glancing up from the book lying open on his desk, Lavi winced at the faintly distressed noises from the direction of the bed, knowing that his oldest lover would be less than pleased with being awakened by the bed's other occupant.

Sliding his chair back quietly, he made to stand, hoping to comfort the Noah before his troubled dreams became the focus of yet another argument.

He only had time for a single step when something astonishing took place.

Murmuring sleepily, the scientist shifted closer to the other's hunched form, pressing against his shoulders until the crown of his head settled firmly beneath his chin. Sighing quietly, the brunette relaxed into the proffered warmth, one hand closing on the material of his rival's shirt loosely.

Watching silently, the Exorcist smiled.

While hardly a declaration of peace, it was a start.

#22 - Dark

Tyki watched in rapt fascination as emotions crossed his sleeping lover's face, perturbed by the unnaturally malicious turn of his lips as he sighed. He had never thought that hearing his own name on those lips could be chilling, but the intonation of the boy's dreaming voice made it so.

#23 - Despair

When Lavi raised the shard of broken mirror, it occurred to him that perhaps nothing was quite so lonely as the prospect of being left to bleed clean one's imperfections in a home that still smelled of tobacco and brimstone.

#24 - Wrong

Even though the thought was fudamentally wrong, Tyki found a certain dark pleasure in the memory of biting his lover, for the boy's instinctive reaction had proven that he could take the man's violence in stride should he be unable to contain it.

#25 - Hold

Tyki never failed to be amazed at the gentle twining of fingers against his own; even in the dark aftermath of physical affection, his lover seemed to have still more that he wished to convey.

#26 - Picture

Lavi wondered if it were his stern expression or the promise of a reward that kept the older man from moving while they waited for their carefully posed picture to be taken, but the teasing stroke of a finger through the back of his new jacket made the question ridiculous.

#27 - Goodbye

Turning his back on the boy who had once been his friend, Lavi decided that the feeling of frigid contempt from behind could never really compare to the sensation of vital and living warmth beside him.

#28 - Drive

The soft voices of long-dead family could be blamed for many things, but it was Tyki's own wants that prompted him to smile at his lover's thinly veiled hints as the hour grew late.

#29 - Precious

Tyki wondered if his redhaired lover knew that no breath had ever been as sweet as the first that came after feeling the faint twitch of fingers against his own, since he could now say that there was a purpose to air beyond carrying the scent of one who was very nearly lost.

#30 - Introduction

Lavi couldn't help but to dwell on the first meeting he'd had with his lover's Noah side; for no reason other than to recall the man's almost playful banter as he'd acquainted the redhead with his own brand of split persona.

#31 - Love

As soon as the words left his mouth, Lavi knew that there would be no taking them back; and the thought that he may not hear them repeated was painful enough to prove that they were true.

#32 - Insanity

Staring first at the flimsy wooden contraption in his lover's hands, and then at the nearly vertical expanse of snow at their feet, Tyki could only hope that the mental home would allow them to share a room once all the bones had mended.

#33 - Gray

Lavi had always believed gray to be a singularly unremarkable color, but when he found himself caught by the deep charcoal-shaded eyes of his panting lover, he thought that perhaps such opinions were meant to be changed.

#34 - Cat

Watching his older housemate lick a stray drop of honey from his finger, Lavi wondered if the man knew how utterly feline he sometimes was. A sideways look and a hum assured him that he did.

#35 - No Time

Shaken by the steadily growing puddles of scarlet, Tyki could only nod appeasingly at his lover's faint murmurs, swearing that he would listen once there was no longer any reason for haste.

#36 - Trouble Lurking

Tyki knew without looking that somehow he'd managed to irritate his lover, as he found his hand suddenly holding nothing but air and the space beside him grew almost palpably chilly.

#37 - Family

When Lavi took in the sight of his lover and their child curled together among the soft pillows and sheets of their bed, he wondered if it was wrong to feel excluded, until a drowsy smile and a lifted blanket made him very much a part of their closeness.

#38 - No Way Out

When he felt the cool firmness of the wall against his back, Lavi wondered if he should have tried to aim for the door instead, but the promising gleam in his lover's narrowed eyes made it clear that some mistakes were more pleasant than others.

#39 - Do Not Disturb

Though Michaela was very young, she knew that the wide-eyed expression on her Papa's face meant that there would be a short bedtime story, and no sharing a bed with her family tonight.

#40 - Horror

Staring speechlessly at the smoking ruin that had been his kitchen, Tyki wondered if his lover truly intended to consume the blackened lump that had once been a perfectly ordinary cut of meat.

#41 - Mischief Managed

Gazing down at his exhausted lover, Lavi wondered if he should admit to wearing his old uniform purely for the effect it had on the man's attention span, then decided that perhaps some things were better left unsaid.

#42 - All That I Have

"I call."

Blinking stupidly at the neat fan of hearts across the table, Lavi sincerely hoped that the carpet was somehow warmer than it felt through the fabric of his single remaining garment.

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Well, there's yet more.. writing. Might have something else later..

Yey.

Regression

2009-07-28T17:46:48Z

New Lucky fic, be glad and all that.

Regression

A DGM Lucky Fic

By SisterWicked

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Sometimes, Lavi wondered if being a Bookman were really worth the trouble it caused.

This was one of those times.

Looking across the dark material of a suitclad arm currently pressed firmly against his throat, he almost, almost wished he'd never heard of Bookmen, or the Black Order, Exorcists or Akuma..

Or Noah.

He had no illusions about the outcome of this meeting, even with his Innocence still clenched in one hand, bathing the alley with it's supposedly holy light. He knew all too well what happened to the Exorcists who crossed paths with this particular member of the Noah clan, both from experience and recounted tales spun by horrified Finders unlucky enough to 'find' the victims afterward.

Swallowing, he met the other's bright golden eyes squarely, determined to die with at least some sense of dignity.

The man's low chuckle was surprising for all the malice it lacked, but the quick removal of his forearm doubled the redhead's confusion. The number multiplied to the one-hundredth power when the Noah leaned forward sharply, half-parted lips meeting his own as he urged the Exorcist's back away from the stone wall behind him.

Too stunned to resist, he felt his hammer slide through his suddenly numb fingers, the short clack of it's landing on the cobblestones bringing him out of his shortlived stupor. Making a sound that was half anger and half disgust, he shoved the brunette away, wiping his mouth fiercely on his sleeve. "What the fuck are you doing? Christ!"

Turning his head to spit, he glared at the man balefully, retrieving his shrunken Innocence and setting it alight. "You really are something, huh? A murderer, a lunatic and a rapist? How do you fit all that in and still manage to fool people into thinking you're human?" Snorting at the other's wide eyes, he shook his head. "What, you can't fight without completely violating your opponent? Great. Stand right there and I'll be happy to just-"

The Noah blinked in genuine surprise, his skin fading to a clear olive as he stepped forward. "Wait! What's the matter with you? I thought you wanted-" He drew up short as the redhead levelled his hammer threateningly. "You lied, then. I should have known better." Laughing humorlessly, he nodded. "You didn't have to do that, you know.. If you'd simply told me it was finished, I would have let it go at that."

Scowling at the older man, Lavi pushed his back to the wall. "I don't know what you're talking about, but it sounds like bullshit to me. I thought mindgames were your little sister's department, Noah." Taking a breath to continue, he raised an eyebrow at the other's quick flinch. "Go on, tell your story then. I'd love to hear exactly what you've come up with that involves you kissing me before you start rearranging my organs."

The brunette shook his head slowly, stepping backward. "You really don't remember, do you." He eyed the boy's still-wary pose, sighing. "Is this what you meant, when you said the old man was going to change you..? None of what happened means anything because you're a different person."

Lavi blinked in surprise, his grip on the hammer faltering. "How d'you know about that? What the hell am I supposed to be remembering?" He kept his back firmly to the wall, wondering what the man could possibly be planning. "I don't know you. I damn sure haven't told people about being someone else, and Gramps and I are the only ones who could have-" He broke off with a growl of frustration. "He's on a mission. Did that bitch get him? You know because she could see it in his head."

Tyki shook his head again at the boy's furious accusation. "No! You told me yourself, just before the last time." He stepped further away, halting when his back met stone. "I don't know how to explain this to you, but there was something between us. You can choose to believe me or not, but this is definitely not the place for such a discussion.."

The Exorcist laughed harshly, lowering his weapon. "You really thought this out, didn't you? Well, where would you suggest for a chat? I doubt your master would want us cozying it up in the den over tea."

The older man frowned, nodding. "Hardly. There is a place, but I'd have to touch you to take you to it." Seeing the redhead's sceptical look, he sighed. "I can't make you trust my intentions anymore than I can make you believe what I have to say, Lavi. If you really want to know, you'll have to rely on your Order's 'faith'."

Taking in the brunette's slightly pained face, Lavi mentally chided himself for his curiousity. "If you know as much as you say, you should know I'm not all that into the religious side of this." Bracing himself, he dispelled his Innocence. "Don't try anything, Noah. I might die, but I won't make it any easier for you than this." He stretched out a hand, waiting for the man to take action.

After a moment of surprise, the brunette smiled faintly, reaching forward to meet him. "You still take foolish risks, even after this change of yours.. Somehow, I wonder how different you really are, Lavi." Brushing against the boy's fingertips, he allowed their hands to intertwine loosely, moving close enough to be sure of the other's safety. "You might want to close your eyes, this always made you dizzy before."

The redhead's eye narrowed challengingly, his grip tightening. "I can handle anything you do. Let's go, before I start thinking about how stupid this is."

Tyki nodded, holding the boy's stare as he drew on his power, shifting them abruptly away from the alley. Feeling him stagger, he caught his waist, holding him steady until he jerked away. "You see? I tried to warn you.. But besides that, take a seat. This isn't a short story."

Looking around, Lavi squinted at the low lighting, his eye adjusting quickly to the near-darkness. "Where is this?"

The brunette shrugged, sitting at one end of a fairly threadbare couch. "My home away from home, if you will. This is where my human counterpart lives. You've been here before, several times." Gesturing to the opposite side, he waited for the Exorcist to join him, humming at his obvious reluctance. "I won't touch you, Lavi. I'd offer you something else, but I never really saw a need for more than basic furnishings."

The boy scowled nervously, sitting as far from the other as possible given the size of the couch. "Or the need for vision, apparently." He muttered, setting his shrunken hammer down in his lap. "I can hear in the dark though, so get on with it. Tell me what we're supposed to be to each other."

Tyki forced himself to relax despite the redhead's mistrustful tone. "We were lovers." He stated simply, wincing at the boy's angry growl. "And I had thought we were something quite beyond just that. You told me that the old man would change you when you left the mansion, but you promised to come back. You asked me to wait, and I have."

The Exorcist's face rivaled his hair as he shook his head rapidly, his hands closing into fists. "That's a fucking lie! We were never anywhere near you, and even if we were, I sure as hell wouldn't have given you the time of day! How could you expect me to believe that I'd actually have stooped that low, to let you-"

Tyki leaned forward swiftly, ignoring his enraged noise as he seized the lapels of his open jacket. "Stooped, Lavi? Knelt would be closer. Right about where your feet are now, and you told me that it took days for the burns on your knees to heal. As for the time of day, I can remember you telling me several times that it was time to stop talking and start undressing."

Hauling him roughly across the worn material, he pointed to a single scorched mark on the armrest, his voice harsh in the Exorcist's ear. "And there? That's where I dropped a cigarette because you were in too much of a hurry to let me put it out before you started licking me. In all fairness, I couldn't have cared less at the moment either.. You told me that you wanted as much of me as you could get, until you found a way to come back for more."

Releasing his grip, he forced down his anger with effort. "I knew where you were going, and I still.. How could it just be gone, Lavi? Days, weeks, months.. There isn't a single part of you that I don't know! And you should be the same, it isn't something one forgets!" He allowed the Exorcist to retreat, shaking his head. "I would have let you go, if it had been physical. There never would have been anything more than that, if you hadn't asked for it directly."

He laughed at himself bleakly, gesturing at the redhead's speechless rage. "You were just as angry when I asked if you really meant what you said, Lavi. The thought that I wouldn't believe you was completely outside of your ability to reason." Regarding the other squarely, he hummed curiously. "Go on, tell me that I'm a liar again. Nothing you say will make it any less real.. You even told me that my heart would be safe with you, because you already knew how to hide your own."

Visibly collecting himself, the Exorcist took a breath. "No part of me you don't know, huh? Then tell me something. How'd I lose this?" He pointed a finger at his eyepatch, smirking at the man's surprised expression. "There's no way you wouldn't know, if we-"

"You didn't."

The brunette's soft response halted his triumphant rant like a brick wall, leaving him stunned as he leaned backward sharply. "What?"

"It's only for show. You never needed it." Tyki slid closer, taking advantage of the boy's shock to lift a hand to the strap that held the thin cloth in place. Slipping the tip of his finger beneath it, he tugged it upward slowly, watching the newly-revealed pupil contract and then expand in the half-light of the room. "You said the old man would be angrier at that than anything.. No one was supposed to know, and you were never supposed to take this off."

Stroking his thumb along the redhead's cheekbone, he smiled. "You showed me, though. Why would you do that, if we were enemies?" Seeing the Exorcist's eyes widen, he shook his head. "You wouldn't have. And there's no other way I could have known." He made to pull his hand back, but the boy latched onto his wrist almost painfully to stop the movement.

"How long..? How long were we- How long have you been..?" He struggled to form coherant questions, overwhelmed at the impossibility of the man's claim. "Why were you waiting, dammit? If you knew where I was going, why did you even bother? I don't remember anything about you, not a single-"

"Eu te amo, Lavi."

The fact that he shouldn't have been able to understand the obviously foreign statement was overlooked in light of the actual meaning of the words, and he shook his head rapidly in denial. "Don't say that! You don't even know how!" Realizing that he still had hold of the brunette's arm, he snatched his hand away as if the contact had burned his fingers, still refusing to believe that there could be any truth in the older man's story. "You wouldn't have just let me leave, if you meant that! I wouldn't have forgotten it, either!"

Tyki waited patiently for him to finish, his gaze steady. "You told me that you had to go. The only way I could have stopped you was by force." He bent close, following the Exorcist as he leaned back in response. "Would you rather I'd done that? I didn't do it because it would have been too much like owning you.. And I don't think you've forgotten completely, there had to be some part left behind for you to allow even this much."

Ignoring the boy's panicked gasp, he planted one hand beside him on the armrest, effectively hedging him in. "There's nothing familiar to you, nothing at all?" He narrowed his eyes at the other's almost frightened expression, shaking his head. "You never forget what you learn, Lavi. You told me so yourself, once you've seen or heard or felt something, it stays with you forever.. Why would it only be this? How could you not remember-" He growled in frustration, bending to catch the Exorcist's mouth with his own.

Feeling him stiffen, he kept the touch light, using only enough pressure to emphasize the gentle brush and cling of lips as he sighed. Undeterred by the lack of response, he buried his free hand in the boy's thick hair, cradling his head as he licked carefully along the curve of his lower lip. The act drew a choked sound from the redhead, his fingers curling reflexively into the material of the older man's shirt.

The Noah lifted his head slightly, watching the Exorcist's face for any sign of recognition. "That's completely strange to you, Lavi..? Everything started from there, it was the first thing you gave me on your own.." Seeing the boy's mouth move, he bent his head until the sound of breath became words.

"Just from that..?"

He nodded slowly, taking note of the anxious shivers that wracked the other's body. "Only that. Over and over, even when we did nothing else.. I never tired of it, Lavi. For some reason, just kissing you was enough sometimes."

The redhead was silent for a long moment, his hands loosening fractionally as he took a breath. "..then.. could you.. Just one more..?"

The older man inhaled sharply, his own grip tightening in response to the soft question. "That's what you always said.. Because you knew I would never refuse you." He pulled away from the Exorcist's ear to comply, absurdly delighted when the boy tipped his head to meet him halfway with a shaky whimper.

He meant for this kiss to be equally soft and careful, but the Exorcist's response was a factor that he hadn't included in his ideal. Though he was obviously still hesitant, there was no unwillingness in the act, and the almost shy parting of his lips drove a quick bolt of longing through the older man. Remembering those long-ago first kisses, he forced down a surge of bitterness, lifting his head with a sigh.

"Enough," He murmured, closing his eyes. "There's no meaning in it, now." Pushing himself upright, he avoided the redhead's curious stare. "You've never missed it, have you? I was so sure that you really did-" He laughed softly, the sound making the younger boy flinch. "I should tear you to pieces, Exorcist.. You're no longer the person I swore to protect."

Hearing the boy's short breath, he shook his head. "But I won't. I can't. You needn't fear for your safety, Lavi.. Enemy or no, I still love the person you were with me."

Wary of the man's deteriorating mood, Lavi swallowed. "You didn't answer me, before." He took a breath, preparing to be told to mind his own business. "How long were we.. Together?"

Tiki smiled faintly, the expression strained. "Just shy of a year." He dug briefly through his pockets, pulling out a slightly crooked cigarette. Lighting it with a deftly produced match, he inhaled deeply, rubbing absently at the bridge of his nose. "Less time than we've been apart.. I really don't know what I was expecting, after so long."

The boy blinked in surprise, straightening. "I've been with the Order for over two years, Tyki. Why did you wait until now? I've seen you before, and you never said a thing.."

Still absorbed in his false calm, Tyki shrugged. "Wouldn't it have been dangerous? You had already risked everything once, and that was when we were much closer in habitation, if nothing else. How would you have managed the same feat from within the Order? I couldn't have approached you until you were by yourself." He retrieved an ashtray from the table beside him, flicking his ashes carelessly. "I should have been able to see that you didn't recognize me, but I suppose I simply didn't wish to."

Lavi made to question him further, but the brunette cut him off with a short wave. "This has no bearing on history, Lavi. There's no need to drag the whole pitiable tale to light, is there? Your curiosity is understandable, but it's more than empty facts for me."

Refusing to be deterred, the Exorcist clenched his hands. "Then why did you bring me here at all? If I told you I'd be changed, I would have told you that it's a complete change! I stop being someone when it happens, I might not have even had the same personality! The person I was must have been a selfish bastard to tell you to wait-"

The older man rounded on him fiercely, his eyes narrowed in anger. "I wouldn't have changed! You don't simply stop loving someone, Lavi!" Stubbing out his cigarette, he leaned forward with a growl. "I would have gone with you, even if it had meant my destruction! For all I know, you told me that to stop me from following you!" He took a breath to calm himself, shaking his head. "You could have done this to yourself, to keep us both safe. Like I said, you told me that you never forget something that's happened.. How else could your memories of me simply cease to be? You made yourself forget."

Lavi shook his head, suddenly angry. "I don't know of any way to do that! I've seen things as this person that I'd forget if I could, there's just no way to do it! I couldn't just make myself forget something, and then forget that I knew how!" He met the man's dark gaze squarely, ignoring the potential for danger. "I'm not a Bookman yet, it'll be years before I know how to do things like-" He faltered, his eyes wide. "I'd have to learn something like that from a full Bookman.. And he hasn't taught me that yet."

He swallowed thickly, shaking his head. "He wouldn't have done that to me. He would have found a new apprentice and left me behind, he wouldn't have taken something like that away from me."

Confused, Tyki moved closer, watching the boy with growing unease. "Lavi? What do you mean?" Frowning at the redhead's mounting panic, he reached for his shoulder, shaking him gently. "Lavi, answer me. What does the old man have to do with this?"

Raising his head, the Exorcist cleared his throat. "I don't remember my family." He muttered, breathing quickly. "He took me in because he was the one that found me.. Something awful happened to them, and I was there-" He shuddered faintly, closing his eyes. "He made it go away. Whatever I saw messed me up, made me crazy or something. He got rid of that, and then he started training me as his successor. He could have.. But he wouldn't! He only did that to make me better!"

Blinking rapidly, he shook his head. "He wouldn't have taken away a whole year. If I really.. He wouldn't have made me forget you." Listening to his own frightened voice, he wondered exactly who he was tring to convince, himself or the surprised Noah. The idea that his mentor could have coldly and completely erased something as vital as what the brunette claimed to be real was staggering. "It's not perfect, either. Sometimes I get a feeling from a place or a person, like it's familiar. He said it's because there's something too similar to what he made me forget, and it just feels like deja'vu. There's nothing like that now, I don't feel-"

The older man tightened his grip, stilling the boy's rant with a firm squeeze. "Have you tried? You've been denying the possibility from the start, couldn't you make an honest attempt?" The intensity of his words startled the Exorcist, his voice bordering on what might have been desperation.

"I wouldn't even know where to start, Tyki! I've been listening, but I don't sense anything from it, it's only words to..!"

The brunette jerked him forward, wrapping him in a crushing embrace. Burying his face against the boy's hair, he closed his eyes. "I could tell you anything you wanted to know, if it would make you remember.. This house, it was the place we went, that very first time.. We were at it for hours, Lavi." He shuddered at the memory, his arms loosening slightly. "I never took so much time with a person before that, I just couldn't stand the thought that I might hurt you.. You practically had to demand that I take you."

Lavi flushed hotly, the utter sincerity in the other's voice striking him like a blow. Recalling the cautious press of the man's body from before, he realised with a start that this seemingly vicious person could be gentle, when it suited him. "Was.. Was it during the day..?" He swallowed nervously, mildly alarmed at the strength of his hold. "Or did we stay the night..?"

Tyki nodded faintly, his grip more cradling than restrictive. "It was night time, near the end of summer." He hummed curiously, shifting his head to rest atop the boy's shoulder. "I never thought to ask, but does your birthday change when you do..? If not, you'll be having one soon, your 19th.." He laughed quietly, the sound infinitely more expressive than before. "There's something to be said for youth, but perhaps it was too soon for what we did.. At my age, I should have known better."

The Exorcist shook his head, relaxing at the other's improved disposition. "You aren't that much older than me.. And it's always the same day. You're right about the year though. Was it my birthday?"

Tyki sighed, releasing the boy entirely. "No, it was after that. I don't really know why I allowed it to happen at all, you were barely sixteen.." He leaned back, his eyes roaming over the redhead's familiar features. "I wouldn't have changed it, though. Even if I'd known this was coming, I still would have let myself fall."

Moving away, he smiled at the redhead's obvious surprise. "It was worth it, Lavi. I don't think I've ever been quite that happy to just be with someone." Rising to his feet, he turned toward the far wall, gesturing at the few pictures scattered over it. "Anything like this can be forged, but.." He walked to a place near the center, carefully unhooking one of the frames. Returning to the seated redhead, he turned the picture to face him. "This is the only one I have, but you can't deny that it's you."

Lavi took the frame gingerly, blinking at the unmistakeable image of himself. The clothes he wore were casual, a simple pullover shirt with dark pants, and as always he wore the useless eyepatch over one side of his face, but what caught his attention was the expression on this boy's face. He was smiling brightly at whoever had taken the picture, his visible eye alight with a mischievous glint that belied the severity of his assumed pose.

Glancing back at the bare patch of wall, he inhaled shakily at the difference in coloration, something that suggested the picture had been there for some time. Noting the odd positioning, he cleared his throat. "It's off-center."

The older man smiled, reaching to take the frame. "Indeed. I put it there because I wanted to be able to see it-"

"From anywhere in the room." Lavi whispered, his hands closing so tightly that the glass and wooden pictureframe creaked ominously. "You wanted to be able to look at it when you came home, and when you were anywhere here, all you needed to do was turn your head.." He closed his eyes, pushing down a sharp lurch of disorientation. "You took this." It wasn't a question, but the older man hummed an affirmative.

"Not too long before you left. There was one of me, but that's most likely long gone by now." He carefully removed the picture from the boy's shaking hands, setting it on the sidetable. "Are you all right, Lavi..? You're very pale.."

The Exorcist nodded, shook his head, then nodded again. "I don't know." He said, finally. "If this is a trick, it's the best one I've ever seen, but if it's not.." He shuddered, his arms wrapping around himself defensively. "I don't want it to be true. I don't want to think that I had something like that, and then had it just be taken away." He stared up at the brunette pleadingly, his voice almost too soft to be understood. "Tell me the truth. Even if you're a Noah, some things are just too cruel to do.. Tell me if this is real or not, Tyki."

The older man sank down to sit beside him, his face serious. "If I could give you my own memories, I would, Lavi. I'm sorry that I brought you here, now.. All I've done was cause you pain." He lifted a hand to the boy's face, his palm warm against the shock-cool skin of the other's cheek. "Forgive me, for not knowing when to let go?"

Lavi turned his face into the touch, his eyes closed tight. "I'll fix it." He said, his hands clenching atop his lap. "I'll make him give me back what he stole from me. Every second of it." Taking a rough breath, he met the older man's eyes. "I'll keep that promise, Tyki. If you can wait just a little longer, I'll find my way back." With that said, he leaned forward, pausing only centimeters from the brunette's surprised face. "Will you wait, Tyki? It won't be nearly so long this time.."

The Noah nodded faintly, his hand moving to cup the back of the redhead's neck. "As long as it takes, Lavi. Forever, if I have to." He moved closer purposefully, allowing the boy ample time to pull away if he so wished.

His caution was completely unwarranted, the Exorcist's eyes closing as he accepted the man's gentle kiss. Feeling the slow stroke of the other's tongue on his lip, he shivered, his mouth opening to grant him access.

Tyki growled softly, his free hand wrapping around the boy's waist to move him closer. Relishing the velvety wetness of his tongue, he urged him to respond with a questioning hum, the sound dropping into a moan when the redhead pressed a hand to his thigh for support.

Pulling back, he laughed breathlessly. "My apologies, Lavi.. I let myself get carried away." Realizing that the Exorcist was leaning at an extremely awkward angle, he laughed again, pressing carefully against his chest. "Very carried away."

Lavi resisted the movement, shaking his head. "Don't apologize, I wanted you to let go.. I still want you to." Biting his lip, he swallowed. "You said that it was enough, sometimes.. Was it, really..?" He sighed at the man's slow nod, his hand moving higher as he shifted his weight. "Show me? I'd like see what was so good about it.."

For a moment he thought the brunette would refuse, his eyes wide as he searched the Exorcist's flushed face for something known only to him. Then, the hand against the boy's chest moved back to his waist, it's mate pushing firmly against the small of his back as the Noah pulled him forward to half-sprawl across his lap.

"The best part was having you so close, Lavi.. That's something else that hasn't changed." He pressed their mouths together firmly, sucking at the boy's lower lip as he drew him up to straddle his legs. Hissing at his soft whine, he curled his fingers around the Exorcist's hip, his teeth closing gently on the swollen skin of his mouth. "You taste the same," He whispered, his opposite hand sliding up to rest between his shoulderblades. "Just as sweet as I remember.."

Lavi gasped in surprise at the instant leap of his pulse, the quick beat leaving him faintly dizzy. "I.. Thank you?" He flushed at the pitch of his voice, shaking his head. "Did we do this a lot? It.. I shouldn't know how, I haven't.." Biting his lip in embarassment, he laughed. "I don't really have time to run around kissing people, you know? I didn't do it when I was younger, either.." He tapered off, his breath catching at the older man's intent gaze.

"There's been no one else, Lavi? You could tell me, I wouldn't be angry under these circumstances.." His hands tightened at the boy's silent negative, his voice rough as he chuckled quietly. "If not that, then certainly nothing beyond it, yes? Even now, you're still mine." He didn't wait for a response, pulling the Exorcist down for another kiss. This one was nothing like it's predecessors, the hard press of his mouth hungry in a way that made the younger boy shudder in mixed anxiety and arousal.

Lifting his hands to the man's chest, he clutched shakily at the material of his shirt, whimpering at the insistant movements of his lips and tongue. His lingering fear dissolved at the Noah's broken moan, his fingers relaxing to splay over the soft cotton in a hesitant caress. Feeling the brunette shift into the touch, he stroked upward, his fingers curling loosely around the back of his neck in soundless encouragement.

The effect on the other was startling, his back moving away from the couch as he pulled the Exorcist flush against him with a low growl. Lifting his head, he took a quick breath, then buried his face into the junction of the boy's throat and jaw. Speaking between careful nips and kisses against the skin, he traced idle designs on the redhead's back, his words sending a rush of heat up the Exorcist's spine.

"We'll have to be careful, Lavi.. You don't remember where the limit is, when it stops being enough." He sucked at a place just below the redhead's ear, licking over the faint mark. "It's almost past that now.."

Lavi slipped his arms behind the man's shoulders, clinging to him desperately as he panted for breath. "That's all right.. Don't stop if you need-"

The brunette jerked back quickly, his eyes wide. "What? No!" He shook his head rapidly, ignoring the giddy surge of lust at the boy's offer. "Not yet, not until you've regained your memories.. It wasn't this that I waited for." Seeing the Exorcist's surprise, he smiled. "It isn't your body that I need, Lavi.. Once you remember, you'll understand." Pressing a kiss to the redhead's cheek, he hummed quietly. "I promise to make up for it then.. This is the first and only 'no' you'll ever hear from me."

Nodding faintly, Lavi relaxed his hold. "I'm sorry, I just thought you might.. It's been a long time, so.." He blinked, stiffening. "It has, hasn't it? You haven't.. Have you?" His tone was almost fearful, and the older man's chest tightened at the half-terrified look on his face.

"Never. Not since, and not now, Lavi." He shook his head firmly, arms wrapping around the boy's waist. "I've never believed in substitution, and anyone I touched would have had to compete with you." Urging the Exorcist to lean into him, he stroked his hair soothingly. "I have to take you back.. If you're gone too long, they'll think you've deserted or some such."

The redhead's laugh was muffled, his arms flexing briefly. "Haven't I though? I won't be able to stay, I'll be lucky if someone doesn't try to kill me before I can leave." Sitting up, he smiled darkly. "I don't really want to fight a friend, but I'm not going to let that stop me if I have to. Will I be able to find you again, Tyki..? I don't know how long it'll take me to get back, but I'm going to need a place to stay until I find somewhere for myself."

The man frowned thoughtfully, shaking his head. "You'll stay here, obviously. Do you really think I'd let you out of my sight after this?" Under his light tone, there was a completely serious question, one that made the Exorcist's breath catch sharply.

"I'll stay here if you want me to, Tyki.. I just didn't want to assume." He smiled crookedly, his hands moving to the other's shoulders as he prepared to rise. "I've got to take care of this first, though. Is there somewhere I could look for you? I'll have to make sure no one follows me, so I might have to take a little side trip first, just in case.."

The brunette nodded, allowing him to stand. "You'd be leaving from England, yes? I doubt they'd send you off with good graces, so close distance would be best.." Rising to his feet, he sighed. "The Guardsman's Watch. It's a tavern in west London, I've stayed there before on.. business. Come there, and ask for Theydon Hart." Seeing the boy's questioning look, he smiled. "That was the name of the man I was after. A contractor who thought he could outrun the Earl."

Retrieving the Exorcist's eyepatch from the far end of the couch, he handed it to him, waiting patiently while he slipped it into place. "You needn't worry about being trailed, Lavi. We would meet and be gone before they had time to do more than blink." Indicating the redhead's almost forgotten Innocence, he allowed him to retrieve that for himself, stepping forward to embrace the boy with a soft laugh. "I'll wait for you, but I'd rather it was as soon as humanly possible.. It's in my nature to be impatient."

Lavi returned his tight hold eagerly, nodding against the front of his shirt. "As long as it's safe, Tyki. I won't go directly to you if there's a screaming horde behind me, but I won't take any longer than I absolutely have to.. Just wait. I promised, and no matter who I am, I don't lie when it matters." Leaning back reluctantly, he forced himself to smile up at the older man. "Do I get a goodbye kiss, Tyki..? You could consider it incentive, if-"

He got no further, the Noah's mouth stilling the words with a kiss too rough to be anything but frightened. Pressing as close as their differing heights allowed, Lavi returned the touch with equal fervor, his hands fisted tightly against the man's back. Pulling away with a gasp, he inclined his head, drawing the other's face down to his throat.

"Leave a mark," He panted, fingers winding into the brunette's hair. "Something I can see, so I won't.. Please, Tyki. I need something real.." He cried out at the sharp sting of the other's teeth, his hands tightening in encouragement as the man sucked hard at the smarting skin. Allowing him to pull away, he shivered at the feeling of cool air on the sensitive flesh, his smile less dishonest than before. "Thank you.. Let's go before I try to convince you to do that somewhere else."

The older man laughed, shaking his head. "And you say your personality may have changed.. But yes. The sooner you leave, the sooner you'll return." Closing his eyes, he willed them back into the alley, holding the redhead steady when he lurched. "I wish I could make that easier for you, Lavi. Perhaps we could work on that after you return."

The Exorcist nodded, stepping backward. "Anything you want, Tyki. I'm going to the train station now, if I'm lucky they'll let me change my ticket to something a little sooner." Biting his lip, he half extended his hand toward the other, letting it fall with a sigh. "I'll never get anywhere like this.. Goodbye, Tyki." Turning around, he forced himself to walk away, clenching his hands as he reached the street. Glancing back, he smiled faintly at the man's silent presence, closing his eye tightly when he vanished.

Steeling his resolve, he strode out onto the sidewalk, his pace quickening as he spotted the station building in the distance. 'Soon,' He thought, 'I'll be back soon, it's only a day's travel.. And I'll never have to leave again. No more hurting and fighting.. There's nothing but happiness after this.'

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And then, attracted by his flaming yaoi thoughts, lightning struck, frying his bunny ass. Ha, just kidding.. But I wonder, should I even bother finishing this? It'd be 1-2 more chapters at most.. Tell me what you think, and DO NOT fave/alert list me without commenting, I'll send you a rude PM if you do. Thanks for reading!

Comments?

Nightmare Game chapter 9

2009-07-25T22:49:52Z

Here you go, whoever's still waiting.

Black Vision
There you go. Take your time with that bad boy.

Nightmare Game 8

2009-06-22T06:26:44Z

Here you all go, anyone who wants it..

Nightmare Game

A D.Gray-Man Fanfiction

By SisterWicked

Chapter 8 - Blind Oracle

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Now, I usually don't do this, but no one really believed I had the balls to, so..

Disclaimer of D-zeez: I don't own this. No one pays me for it. And no eavesdropping bimbos were harmed in the writing of this fic. This chapter may be hazardous to your health. Warning signs include dizziness, rapid pulse, prolific bleeding from the nostrils and swine flu. Contact the CDC immediately and stop use if you experience any of these symptoms.

PS- Wash your hands before using the phone.

And in addition to that:

Dear Fangirls: I would just like to say, fuck everyone who faves or alert adds without leaving a review, no matter how brief. Srsly, Fuk u with a pigpen fencepost. Now on with the fic.

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Watching the older man carefully, Lavi wondered if he knew that eating was supposed to be a completely non-sexual activity.

After the first nearly-untasted bite of his own food, he decided that perhaps he should be grateful for the proximity of the other diners, as their presence forestalled any rash actions on his part. After the seventh, he recanted the thought and wondered if the brunette truly meant to appear so utterly seductive. A slow glance and a thoughtful lick at the tip of his fork assured the boy that he did.

Swallowing heavily, he reached for his glass, unsurprised to find it nearing empty. Leaning forward, he kept his voice low enough to avoid drawing attention. "You do realize that you're killing the girls across from us, don't you..? The blonde one keeps making a chokey kind of sound.."

Tyki hummed curiously, wiping his mouth with his napkin. "Oh? I hadn't noticed them.. I was more concerned with you, Lovely. Contrary to what I've heard, pink rather seems to suit you."

The redhead ignored the heat in his cheeks, scowling. "That's nice. Do you think you could turn off the pheromones for a bit? I'd like to actually remember what I'm eating.."

The older man raised an eyebrow, looking from the boy's flushed face to his plate and back. "Is it not to your liking, Lavi? Maybe you should have gotten the same thing I did, its wonderful.. See for yourself." Without waiting for a reply, he speared a fragment of meat with his fork, extending his arm across the table with an all-too-innocent smile.

Blinking at the man in stunned disbelief, the Exorcist leaned back as far as his highbacked chair allowed, shaking his head. "Tyki! Cut it out, you're making a scene.."

Laughing quietly, the brunette nodded, fork still held out expectantly. "Indeed.. But the longer I stay like this, the more people will see, Lovely.. Shouldn't you hurry?"

Blushing furiously, Lavi muttered something unintelligible, leaning forward hastily. Hearing the silence to either side of their table, he caught the man's eye mutinously. "If that girl dies, I'm telling them that you planned the whole thing.." Ignoring his faint smirk, he opened his mouth, allowing himself to be fed. The familiar sound of the aforementioned girl's shock seemed deafeningly loud, but he concentrated on the light flavor of the food in his mouth, chewing carefully despite his embarrassment.

Swallowing, he licked his lip thoughtfully. "It is good.. But not as good as you were acting like it was."

Tyki laughed, impervious to the blatant attention from their scandalized 'audience'. "You don't think so, Lovely? Maybe you would prefer something else.." He glanced at the table menu briefly, his mouth quirking at the redhead's warning growl. "They have dessert.. Do you like that sort of thing? I don't care too much for sweets myself, but I wouldn't be adverse to sharing.."

Lavi shook his head firmly, aghast at the very thought of what the man might do with anything even remotely suggestive. "So I can watch you lick your spoon at me..? No thanks."

Feigning seriousness, the older man blinked. "We could always share a spoon, Lavi.. It would give them less silverware to clean."

Sighing deeply, the Exorcist nodded. "Yeah, it would.. But it would give us more trouble than it would be worth. I'm ready whenever you are, so get on with it."

Tyki smiled, raising an eyebrow. "You're always in a hurry, aren't you Lovely..? Its a shame, really. Just think of all the things I could do to you, if you weren't so very impatient."

This time, the girl choked outright, her companion's concerned voice registering as a faint buzz as the Exorcist stared at the older man in horrified astonishment. "Tyki!"

Ignoring the boy's mortification, the brunette pushed back his chair, tossing several bills onto the tabletop. "Are you coming, Lavi? I daresay the ladies need a bit of privacy, since they can't very well gossip with us sitting here."

Rising quickly, the redhead stalked away from the table, his cheeks still flaming as the older man joined him with a laugh. Holding his tongue until they reached the opposite street, he whirled to face the other with a growl. "Why did you do that? You knew they were falling out of their chairs to listen!"

Waving off his anger, Tyki nodded. "Eavesdropping is a singularly unladylike habit, Lavi.. It would most likely do them good to learn that early." Motioning toward an approaching alley, he smiled. "Besides, it was that or tear your heart out.. I really dislike my alias."

Blinking at the man in disbelief, Lavi shook his head. "You'd hold a grudge over a joke?"

Stepping into the shadows, Tyki hummed. "Oh, I never hold a grudge, Lovely.. Once I've avenged myself, I forgive and forget."

Grumbling quietly, the redhead followed, groping blindly for the other in the darkened space. Feeling the brush of a sleeve against his fingers, he sighed, the sound broken off as the older man caught his arm, pushing him roughly against the nearest wall. "Wha-"

Tyki silenced him with a demanding kiss, his hands roaming hungrily over the Exorcist's sides and hips. Nipping at his lower lip, he used the other's muted gasp to enter his mouth, exploring him thoroughly before pulling away.

"Would you rather I'd done that, Lavi? Nothing they served could have compared to you.."

Laughing at the boy's dazed expression, he stepped back. "Don't worry yourself about it, Lovely.. I doubt we'll see those people on anything close to a regular basis. Besides that, shall we go?"

Lavi nodded quickly, allowing the older man to wrap his arms around his waist. "After all that, it'd better be someplace nice, Tyki.. D'you really have to hold on so tight?"

Tyki shook his head, smirking down at the smaller boy. "Its a good place, Lavi. And no, I don't need to.. I do it because I can." Closing his eyes, he concentrated on his destination, eager to bring back the redhead's previous high spirits.

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Lavi's first impression was one of silence.

Opening his eye, he took a breath to steady himself after the lingering jolt of translocation, blinking to dispel his faint dizziness. The older man released his grip, stepping back with a smile.

"All right, Lovely..? We can sit down if you need to." He took the redhead's arm carefully, urging him forward. "I'd forgotten how strange that feels, it certainly takes some getting used to.. Lavi? Is something the matter?"

The Exorcist stood frozen, taking in their surroundings with wide-eyed surprise.

Flowers.

Every conceivable shape and color, spread out for what seemed like whole acres in all directions. Though it was nearing sunset, the vibrant array was clear to his sharpened vision, and he found himself wondering how it was that the older man had found such a place. Turning to look at the bemused former Noah, he was struck by the man's obvious anxiety at his reaction.

"Its-" He cleared his throat, starting again. "Its perfect. Where..?"

Tyki shrugged faintly, relaxing. "I don't really know, Lovely.. I happened upon it by mistake, when I was learning to control my powers." He laughed softly at the boy's raised eyebrow, tugging on his arm. "Contrary to popular belief, the ultimate evil doesn't come with instructions. Care to have a seat?"

Snorting, the redhead nodded, allowing himself to be pointed in the opposite direction. Looking ahead, he stared a second time, beyond shocked at what he'd missed. The tree was easily over a hundred feet tall, with thickly spread branches that brushed the ground in several places. Hearing the other's amused hum, he flushed at the thought of how utterly foolish he must look, gawping like an idiot at something the brunette had seen many times.

Shaking his head, he followed the older man's lead, walking through the calf-high grass to stand at the base of the monolithic plant. Setting the bag he carried aside, he placed his hands against the tree's oddly smooth trunk, wondering why he had no name for it's type. Frowning, he tried to recall the books he'd read about botany, but found nothing even remotely similar to this giant.

Tyki watched him silently, remembering his own reaction to this place. When he'd mastered his ability to touch only what he willed, he'd ascended to the very top of the huge tree, truly astonished that it had survived so long. Perched in its uppermost branches, he had felt that even something so great as his Noah was reduced to minisculity by its immensity.

Bringing his thoughts back to the present, he pulled out the blanket, spreading it between two of the tree's halfexposed roots. "Lovely..? Would you like to sit down now?"

Shaking off his curiosity, the redhead nodded, kicking off his boots with a grateful sigh. "Aah.. I'd forgotten how uncomfortable those are." Settling himself against the tree trunk, he turned to the older man with a smile. "This is something else, Tyki.. Exactly what the doctor ordered."

Laughing quietly, the brunette nodded. "It is rather nice.. Do you like it, Lavi?"

The boy nodded enthusiastically, making the older man smile. "Then it was worth the effort. Now that we're here, do you think you could forgive my earlier humor?"

Lavi frowned in mock thought, finally shaking his head with a falsely severe expression. "No way! Maybe after I've 'avenged myself'." Snickering at the man's arch look, he jabbed a finger at his unprotected ribs, grinning as he flinched. "Revenge!" He cried, lunging at the unsuspecting brunette.

After several minutes of undignified squawks and flailing, Tyki remembered that it was extremely difficult to tickle an intangible person. Allowing the Exorcist to pass through his body, he laughed at his indignant huff. "Better, Lovely..? Just think, if not for my abilities, you may have been the first to defeat a Noah with your bare hands.."

Pushing himself to his knees, the redhead hummed quietly. "More like my bare ass.." He returned to his place, gazing over the open space before them. "Do you come here a lot? I mean, before.. This."

Tyki nodded slowly, relaxing against the tree. "Once, it seemed like every day.. But when the war-" He broke off, closing his eyes. "Not as often as I would have liked, Lovely. I simply didn't have the time to be at leisure. Since the end, I've only been here twice. Once when I reawakened, and once right before I took you." Wincing at the boy's silent scrutiny, he sighed. "Is there something else we could talk about, Lavi? We're supposed to be enjoying ourselves, not rehashing the past.."

The Exorcist slid closer to the man's side, nodding. "Anything you want to talk about, Tyki. Whatever comes to mind is fine with me."

For a while, they simply made idle conversation, the deepening color of the sky lending an air of lazy calm as the silence between topics grew. As the first few stars began to show, Lavi suddenly became aware that his companion seemed to be lost in thought.

Glancing at the other, the Exorcist hummed quietly. "So... What do you want, now? Anything in particular?"

Smiling faintly, the brunette shook his head. "Nothing, unless you still feel like talking.." Frowning at his lightly amused tone, Lavi sat back to better address him.

"I don't mean that. What do you want, Tyki? If you could have anything in the world, what would it be?" He tipped his head curiously, the moonlight making his face a thing of shadow. "Anything, even something like a new hat, or a kitten. World peace. Hell, world destruction. What would make you happy right now?"

The man hummed quietly, meeting his gaze. "I don't know, Lovely. I don't think I know how to be happy, not really.. But I would be pleased to have more of this." He laughed at the other's confused look, settling against the tree trunk. "More time without worry, Lavi. Time to simply forget that you should be plotting my demise. But I wonder..What do you want, Lavi? Surely you can't say that you're happy this way."

The redhead frowned thoughtfully, leaning against his shoulder. "I think I'd like to come here again. Or maybe it would be nice to see you enjoying yourself.. I'd like to be able to do more for you, too. Something better than just sitting around, talking your ear off. Other than that, I'm really okay."

Tyki blinked at him, his eyebrow raised. "That's not for you, Lovely. I should think you'd at least want to see your friends again, if nothing else.. Weren't they important to you?" The boy nodded, frowning.

"They were, but none of them really needed anything from me.. And you do. I think I'd be happiest if I could make someone else feel a little better, instead of just making them laugh every once in a while. It'd be nice if they knew I was all right, but there's probably a lot of more important things going on with them.. And its not like you left a yard-long blood trail or a ransom note. They'll most likely figure that I went AWOL or something."

He sat up, stretching his arms with a yawn. "Beside that, I think I'd like to invade your space for a couple minutes.. You mind?" He didn't wait for a reply, sliding back until he could lay his head in the man's lap. "Mm, that's comfy.. You make a pretty good pillow, for a evil guy."

Tyki snorted, nudging the boy halfheartedly. "And you make a splendid blanket, when you don't snore."

The Exorcist spluttered indignantly, rolling onto his side. "I do not! You're the one who makes all the weird noises while you sleep.." The older man hummed in amusement, shifting lower.

"Oh? Well, you make them when you're awake. Still feel like playing, Lovely..?"

Flushing to the roots of his hair, Lavi shook his head. "Not when you don't play fair.. Are we past the melancholy part of the evening? I don't think I can concentrate on being all tragic and sad after that."

The brunette chuckled softly, nodding. "I believe so.. It is rather difficult to hate oneself while being reminded of just how much someone enjoys their.. company. Do you want to go back, Lavi?"

The boy shook his head firmly, draping an arm around the other's waist. "Hm-mm.. Just a little longer..?"

Tyki looked down, and immediately winced at the hopefulness in the boy's single eye. "Aren't you cold..?" He murmured finally, running a hand up the exposed skin of an arm. "You wouldn't want to be sick, would you?" The Exorcist hummed absently, closing his eye.

"You'd take care of me if I was, and you know it. Bet you'd make a great nurse, too.. Really though, I'll be fine. I used to camp out all the time, and with less pleasant company, so unless you've got a better excuse, I'm gonna stay right here."

With that said, he relaxed, still latched doggedly onto the other. For several minutes, Tyki merely stared at his bent head, mildly alarmed at his tenacity. When he heard the boy's breathing become deep and even, he sighed.

"Little fool.. If you were tired, we could always have gone home where there's a bed. But I suppose that would have made too much sense, hm?"

Glancing at the boy's faint smile, he shook his head. "You're another person who doesn't know what's good for them, Lovely.. It really must be the hair, for you both to be so fearless." Remembering the Exorcist's stunned expression from before, he laughed softly. "I think she could see that in you, that you were the same.. But you aren't really, are you? I saved her, and destroyed you.." He sighed, looking up at the wide expanse of sky. "How long will you be able to keep your word, Lavi? Its only a matter of time before I make you suffer again.. Neither part of me is fit to keep you safe, not when they both want so much from you."

The only response was a quiet murmur, the redhead's arm tightening around his hips as he slept on. The sound and touch sent a quick stab of pain and guilt through the man's chest, his hand moving to stroke the boy's fiery hair as he closed his eyes. 'What it it that makes me this way..? I never dreaded the thought of harming another like this, why are you different? I don't even know you..'

A faint sigh drew his gaze to the boy's face, his hand halting its slow petting as the Exorcist yawned, blinking up at him sleepily.

"Mm. Sorry about that, but you really are comfy.. Too bad we didn't think to bring any real pillows, then you could come down here with me." He stretched his arms upward, wincing at the slight crackle of his spine. "You could anyway, you know? The grass is pretty soft, and being out here is sorta nice for dozing.." He pushed himself half upright, leaning close to the man's surprised face. "Would you do that, until it really is too cold..? I think that's why I couldn't stay asleep, really. You're always right beside me, so not having you there felt kinda wrong.."

Perhaps it was the marginal plea in the boy's tone, or the otherworldly lighting playing tricks on his mind, but Tyki found himself struck speechless by the utter pleasantness of the other's presence, his hands moving to catch the Exorcist's face of their own accord. Seeing his eye widen curiously, he took a slow breath to collect himself, wondering if he should warn the boy of his strange thoughts.

The opportunity was lost when the Exorcist tipped his head to the side, lifting himself to press careful lips to the corner of the brunette's mouth, a hand taking hold of his shirtfront as he spoke faintly against the man's skin. "Please, Tyki..? Things shouldn't feel like that now, not when you came here to be happy.."

Nodding dazedly, the older man allowed himself to be moved, sliding down until he was face to face with the smiling redhead. Turning onto his side, he braced his head on one hand, the other draping itself loosely around the boy's middle. "Is this more to your liking, Lovely..? I must say, it is rather comfortable.."

Humming softly, Lavi shifted closer, matching his posture. "Yeah.. Its great." Lowering his gaze, he picked idly at one of the man's shirt buttons, his brow furrowed in thought. "Thank you, for bringing me here. It's good to know that you actually have someplace like this, where you can relax a little." Glancing up, he grinned crookedly at the other's questioning look. "You're different, out here.. I don't really know how to describe it. You're still you, but better. Less wary, I guess."

Blinking at the man's close attention, he sobered. "Tyki? Did I say the wrong thing again?" He laughed nervously, his fingers stilling. "Look, we don't have to stay, if you want to go back now.. I just thought that you look-" He broke off, averting his face. "You look better when you're not so serious. Not that you look bad normally, but.. You should smile more. God, I really do talk too much.."

The brunette snorted quietly, drawing aimless circles on the boy's back with a finger. "Quite often, yes. But not always." He waited for the Exorcist to look up, tightening his hold fractionally. "Sometimes, you say exactly enough."

At the tone of the older man's voice, Lavi could almost swear that he knew what was coming, but the actual touch of lips on his own was almost absurdly surprising, the hand on the other's shirtfront closing into a tight fist as he gasped. The faint vibration of the man's amusement tickled just enough to be soothing, and he suddenly wondered why he hadn't thought to do this himself.

Forcing his fingers to relax, he raised his hand to curl around the other man's shoulder, tugging gently at his collar to urge him closer. The answering pressure against his back was not altogether unexpected, but the awkwardness of their positions made movement a thing to be considered carefully. The teasing flick of a tongue on his lower lip scattered whatever bits of concentration he may have had, and instead of pondering the issue further, he resorted to the simple expedient of leaning backward, his firm hold on the older man's shirt bringing him along for the movement.

Wincing at the brunette's soft chuckle, he shifted until their bodies aligned somewhat properly, allowing the man to pull away for breath.

"Lose your balance, Lovely..? Or just testing the grass?"

Flushing awkwardly, the Exorcist fumbled for something to reinstate his questionable dignity. "My arm was in the way.. And I needed 'em both anyway." Seeing the other's eyes narrow speculatively, he took hold of his shoulders, pulling him down for a silencing kiss. Feeling the upward curve of his lips, he pushed down his own embarrassment, digging a hand into his hair as he lifted his knees to press meaningfully against the man's hips.

"See..? Couldn't do this over there.. And look at that, you're smiling."

Tyki shook his head faintly, bemused at the boy's reasoning. "Hm. But I don't think we can do this here either, Lavi.. Pillows aren't the only thing we left at home."

The Exorcist smiled up at him brightly, toying with the loose strands of his hair. "You could always go get it.. I'll give you my clothes! Not like I'd go anywhere without those.." Winding a curl around his finger, he tugged lightly. "Or not. Later could mean now, tomorrow, tomorrow night.." Taking a breath, he found himself addressing empty air, his hand still raised as he blinked in surprise. "..Or it could mean right this very second.."

As suddenly as he'd vanished, the man reappeared with an almost audible displacement of air, dropping the container in question carelessly nearby as he sank to his knees between the redhead's thighs. Supporting himself on one arm, he bent to catch the Exorcist's mouth with a low growl, his free hand pulling carefully at the buttons of his borrowed shirt. Freeing the last one from it's place, he pushed the material aside, tracing the waist of his pants. "All of the above sounded equally good to me, Lavi.. But first I think I'll make sure you won't be 'going anywhere'..."

Pulling him upright, he removed his open shirt, moving to the unmarked side of his throat. "Would you really like to come back here, Lovely..? Being all alone like this, aren't you afraid that I might take advantage of you?" He licked along the boy's jaw with a smile, stroking his back and shoulders slowly. Dropping a hand to the button of his pants, he tugged it loose carefully, his fingers teasing the skin just above the redhead's navel.

Lavi shook his head faintly, gripping the man's arms as he panted. "Maybe I'm taking advantage of you, Tyki.. Letting you do things like this whenever you want it, knowing that it can't mean anything.." He bit his lip guiltily, remembering his other's skillful manipulation of the brunette's feelings. "You don't have to be.. Don't do it like this, if its not enough for you. I wouldn't mind if you were less.." He tapered off, at a loss for how to describe the older man's seeming mood. "It feels like I'm lying to you." He finished lamely, blinking rapidly. "I don't want to make you pretend that it isn't just-"

Tyki cut him off with a quick nip to his skin, his eyes serious as he pulled back to meet the Exorcist's stare. "How are you lying, Lavi? Are you forcing yourself to respond this way?" He smiled at the redhead's halting breath, pushing him back just enough to slide his pants lower on his hips. "Is this something that you won't permit, Lovely? I can't treat you like this, if I wish to? What if I wanted to pretend for a little while?" He removed the cumbersome garments completely, setting them aside. "You told me this morning that I should ask for the things I desire.."

Shuddering expectantly, the Exorcist allowed himself to be lain against the soft fabric, his arms reaching for the older man as he closed his eye. "If you want that, Tyki.. I'll let you do whatever you want, as long as it doesn't hurt you." He gasped at the feeling of the other's hand sliding along his thigh, his eye wide with surprise at the gentleness of the touch. "Oh, God.. I really wish I could-" He broke off with a wince, shaking his head.

Leaning close, Tyki pressed his lips to the swell of his ribcage, murmuring softly against the skin. "Wish you could what, Lovely..? Lie to me? Make this real? It doesn't need to be any more than this, does it? You want this, yes?" He moved higher, curling his hand around the boy's arousal with a low hum at its hardness. "You always say that it doesn't matter how I take you, so why would it be wrong of us to enjoy this? Would you prefer that I be rough with you, instead of taking my time?"

The redhead arched shakily into the touch, his breathing choked as he shook his head. "No..! Its not wrong, not if you want-" He struggled to collect his wits, closing his eye tightly. "I just don't know if I can let you, Tyki! Do you really want to waste that on me?" Despite his words, he drew his legs closer around the man's body, his movements openly at odds with his verbal reluctance. Tyki laughed quietly, allowing himself to be pulled down to rest against the boy's chest.

"Oh, it wouldn't be a waste at all, Lavi.. Not here, with you looking at me like you want to be convinced." He leaned in, kissing the Exorcist's throat with a smile. "I wouldn't be pretending that I meant it, Lovely.. I'd be pretending that you did."

The redhead's stillness was mildly concerning, but the rapid beat of his pulse against the man's lips was reassuring. Shifting an arm, Tyki rose to his elbow, still smiling faintly as he took in the other's shock. "I may not love you, Lavi, but I am inclined to be less forceful with you.. And every time you act like this, it makes me wonder just how little you can feel. I've seen far too many emotions in you to believe that only one is excluded."

Ignoring the sudden brightness of the boy's eye, he shook his head. "I won't ask you to lie, Lavi, not after telling you not to.. But I don't feel like this would be wrong, not when it could have been real if we were different people." The Exorcist inhaled deeply, averting his face with a low noise that was neither a laugh nor a sob.

"It doesn't matter who you are, Tyki.. I'm the one that should be different." He bit his lip, blinking furiously. "I really do hate myself, you know..? I really would be someone else for you, if I could do it, but after all this time.." He turned back to meet the brunette's gaze, his expression serious. "All I know how to do is pretend, Tyki. Anything I feel could be a lie, and I wouldn't even know."

The older man sighed, nodding. "I understand that much, Lovely.. But I honestly believe that you would know, because there's no feeling on Earth quite like it." Rising to his knees, he fumbled with the front of his shirt, working the buttons free of their holes without breaking eye contact. Shrugging it off, he let it fall where it would, reaching for his waistband with similar carelessness. "No one instantly falls for someone else, Lavi.. There's no way to know what could happen, all you can do is make the attempt."

Reluctant to leave his place, he frowned at his remaining clothing, missing the redhead's thunderstruck expression. As it was, he had only the slightest warning before he felt the boy move, arms wrapping almost urgently around his shoulders as the Exorcist leaned up for a passionate kiss. Gasping against the other's mouth, he released the annoying material in favor of returning his shaken touches, astonished at his sudden desperation. Feeling the younger boy's hand shift to his face, he drew back slightly, confused by his faint sound of distress.

"Lovely..? Have I finally said too much..?"

Shaking his head, Lavi pressed closer, dropping his hands to tug at the man's unfastened pants. "Just enough.." He mumbled, pulling insistently. "Get rid of these, they're in the way."

Blinking in surprise, the brunette allowed the cloth to pass through his skin, jumping at the sensation of the boy's hand on the inside of his thigh. Bending to catch his mouth, he resumed his own exploration, taking note of the shivers that met his touch even as the redhead's fingers stroked along his arousal.

Pulling away for air, Lavi buried his free hand carefully into the man's hair, urging his face down to rest against his throat with a moan. "I want to be like everyone else..." He whispered, laughing giddily. "Please, Tyki..? Just this once, make me forget that I can't..?"

Nodding slowly, the older man leaned him backward, taking hold of the boy's wrist. Pulling it from between them, he lifted it over the other's head, twining their fingers together loosely. "You see, Lovely..? If you were truly so heartless, you wouldn't wonder at all.." Urging the Exorcist's head back, he nuzzled teasingly at his neck and shoulder, humming at the light pressure of knees against his sides. "Don't forget everything, Lavi. Remember me, at least."

He trailed his fingers down the boy's hip and thigh, rocking against him with a satisfied noise. "Relax, Lovely.. You're far too tense." Ignoring the redhead's whimpered protest, he pulled back, smiling. "Don't worry, I wasn't going to stop. I only thought to look at you, for a moment." Glancing over the Exorcist's exposed skin, he murmured appreciatively. "Gods, but you are as I call you.. Have you never seen it yourself, Lavi?"

His eyes settled on the boy's flushed face, the open surprise in his expression making the brunette sigh. "Does it bother you, for me to say it? Even this is not completely without it's charm.." He leaned over the redhead's body carefully, stroking his thumb over the cheekbone just below the black cloth of his eyepatch. "I was wrong, to call it a disfigurement.. Perhaps it annoys me to have a part of you kept hidden."

Shivering at the light touch, Lavi held his breath as the man drew a finger along the edge of the material. "Don't.." He choked, turning away. "I can't take it off, not ever. I'm sorry." His anxiety made the brunette pause, his hand leaving its place to catch hold of his chin.

"I won't take it off, Lovely, not without your permission. I merely thought that I had never touched it." He bent his head, following the path his fingers had taken with his lips. Reaching the bridge of his nose, he closed his eyes. "You don't have to be so still, if there's something of mine you'd like to feel.. Touch me as you please, Lavi."

He waited patiently, sighing at the boy's hesitant fingers on his sides. "That's something at least.." He murmured, smiling against his skin. Kissing the corner of his mouth, he slipped a hand behind the Exorcist's neck, tipping his head back to better gauge his expression. "Anything at all, Lovely.. I wouldn't offer if it weren't true." The redhead's eye widened slightly, his hands rising steadily along the man's back.

"I.. I just don't know where to start." He laughed shakily, his knuckles brushing the tips of the older man's hair. "I want it to be.. How you want it. I don't really know what to do to make it that way." He combed his fingers through the loosely bound curls, shaking his head. "I can't even think of anything to say, I just want to.. Not mess up, you know?"

Tyki blinked at his sincerity, startled at the reason for his reluctance. "This isn't like that, Lavi.. Nothing you do would be wrong." He leaned down on his elbows, hissing at the Exorcist's low moan at their closeness. Burying his face into the boy's throat, he laughed breathlessly. "Nothing you've ever done was wrong.. I wish that I could explain to you how unnerving that is." He shifted teasingly, humming in approval as the redhead tightened his arms around his back, fingers sinking deeper into his hair as he lifted his hips into the contact.

Shivering at the feeling of the older man's skin against his own, Lavi shook his head dazedly. "Do you really want me to be wrong..? Its not like I think far enough ahead to make any plans, but I could try.. to.. God, that feels good.." He used his hold to press the other closer, his hands clumsy as he lowered one to clutch at the man's slowly rocking hips. "Tyki.."

Gasping for breath, he hooked his foot around the brunette's thigh, whining sharply when the man nipped a path from shoulder to ear and back. "You haven't done anything wrong, either.. Everything's just so.. I've always.." He broke off with a soft cry as the other's tongue retraced his steps, his lips brushing over the lobe of the redhead's ear as he spoke.

"Even the things you say are perfect, Lovely.. But tell me, is this how you imagined it, when you wanted me before?" He smiled at the boy's jerky nod, licking over his rapid pulse as he moved closer to his open mouth. "Then forget everything else, Lavi.. Do as you would have then, and we'll both have one less regret."

Closing his eye, the Exorcist whimpered brokenly at the rising flood of sensation, unable to contain the embarrassingly needy sound. Working his fingers free of the other's hair, he clung to his back, his legs rising to wrap loosely around his waist. "I've only.. got one." He whispered, fighting down his blush. "I wish I hadn't lied, when you first.. Even if I was scared, I should've told you that I wanted.."

He choked back a cry as the man ground against him, his eye widening at the heat of his skin. "I'm sorry, I don't mean to keep-" The keening note in his voice made him wince, but the older man merely shook his head.

"Don't be sorry, Lavi.. I've always enjoyed the sounds you make when you're like this." He laughed softly, pressing a kiss to the boy's jaw. "Perhaps that's why I forget myself with you, Lovely.. Being the first to make you feel these things must have gone to my head." He traced the lobe of one ear with his lips, smiling at his pleading whine. "What was it that you wanted, Lavi? Did you wish for someone to treat you this way, as if they would give anything in the world just to make love to you?"

Gasping sharply, the Exorcist buried his face in the man's shoulder, shaking his head faintly. "Don't.! It's too much, don't call it that! Nobody's ever-" He broke off with a moan, his hips lifting helplessly against the other's. Struggling to speak, he took a rough breath. "They all knew I couldn't give anything back, so they never.. You were my first everything, Tyki. I'd never even had a real ki-"

The brunette cut him off with a gentle squeeze, urging his face up. "Then I truly am sorry, Lovely.. But that's something else unique about you. I don't think I've ever been with anyone quite like you." He caught the boy's mouth with his own, cradling his head as he intensified his steady movements. Feeling his fingers dig into his back, he hummed in agreement, leaning back to breathe.

"And why not call it that..? This is most definitely not fucking, Lavi." He repeated the kiss, following the hard line of the boy's teeth before stroking over his tongue questioningly. The redhead's arms tightened, his head falling back to expose his throat as he shivered.

"Its lying, Tyki.. No matter how you say it, or how much I wish it wasn't, its still just a lie.."

Noting the boy's obvious distress, Tyki shook his head, mildly annoyed with himself. "Don't think of it like that, Lovely.. If it troubles you, think of it as making the attempt." He paused at the other's shaken stillness, lifting his head to meet his gaze. "You don't want that, then..?"

Holding his breath, the Exorcist faltered at the resigned expression on the man's face, visible despite the faint light. Forcing down his anxiety, he fought to regain his wits with extreme effort. "You want to.. But that's not fair! What if you're completely wrong, and I really can't.." He shook his head jerkily, ignoring the surge of disbelief from his resting self. "You'd be stuck with it, and I.."

The older man sighed quietly, lifting himself to his elbows. "You forbid me to fall for you, Lavi? How is that 'fair'? I could no more promise you that than you could promise to love me."

Biting his lip, the redhead closed his eye tightly. "I don't mean it like that, I can't stop you from doing anything! Its just not right!" He growled at the sting of frustrated tears, refusing to let his despair stop his words. "Nobody should feel that way about me, Tyki.. It hurts when someone doesn't love you back." The feeling of the man's lips on his own was astonishing, and he gasped at the intensity of his still-present longing.

Leaning back, the brunette smiled at his surprise. "What of me, Lovely? Maybe I'm as incapable of it as you seem to believe you are.." Stroking the boy's temple lightly, he shook his head. "I don't know why, but that troubles me now. Will you try with me, Lavi? Here, where you say I'm so different?"

Holding the Exorcist's gaze, he sighed. "Do you know what I regret the most, Lovely..? I wish that this could be the beginning, instead of what already was. The thing that would make me 'happy' is something I can't have.. Even at my full strength, I had no power over the past."

Stunned by his admission, the redhead could only blink speechlessly as the man closed his eyes with a slight smile. "I'd undo it all, Lavi.. Everything but the day I found Michaela. That day and it's night are the only times that feel worthy of keeping."

Lavi shook his head, pulling the brunette down with a jerk. "Don't say that! It was all.. If everything hadn't happened just like this, you might not have.." He tightened his arms, ignoring the heat in his cheeks. "We wouldn't be here, would we..? If things were different, I wouldn't know that you-" Breathing deeply, he attempted to slow his racing thoughts. "D'you really want that, Tyki? I don't want you to do this if its because you feel guilty.."

The man's quiet chuckle was muffled against the Exorcist's throat, his hair tickling the other's cheek as he nodded. "I really do, Lovely. I can't say that there's no remorse, but it has nothing to do with this." Pushing himself away from the redhead, he smiled at the high color of his face. "Are you embarrassed, Lovely? I thought I'd been clear about my intentions.."

Lowering his head, he brushed his lips over the boy's cheek, shifting until he could hold himself up. "I want to move past all of that, and see how things could be.. Even if nothing changes, wouldn't you rather know?"

Turning his face into the light touch, the Exorcist allowed him to pull back, his chest painfully tight. "Knowing things is my job, Tyki.. But Bookmen are cold-hearted, they.. We.. Aren't supposed to be attached.."

Narrowing his eyes, the older man bent until they were nose to nose, his voice low but steady. "Then I will melt you."

Reaching for the discarded bottle, he kept their bodies close as he opened it carefully, pouring the chilly fluid into his hand. Setting it nearby, he turned his attention to the astonished redhead, smiling at his silence. "What else can I do, Lovely? You don't believe me?"

Lavi shuddered expectantly, gasping at the sensation of a hand descending steadily along his abdomen. "I.. I believe you, but.." He bucked upward as the man drew tiny circles against the skin of his arousal, his eye closed tight as he whimpered. "What does it do for you..? What do you get from it, Tyki?"

Laughing quietly, the brunette slid his hand lower, spreading the oil across the other's entrance. "That's an easy question, Lavi.. I get you." Watching the boy's eye widen and then close in pleasure, he repeated his slow touches. "You want that, don't you? To have me all to yourself..?"

For a moment, Lavi wondered if it were really possible to die from sheer want. Hearing the older man offer himself in such a way, after all of his protests and excuses.. The faint sense of satisfaction from his resting self echoed his own, and he was almost frightened by the sudden flare of desperation brought on by the feeling.

"Please.." He moaned, arching against the man's teasing fingertips. "I want that too, so.." Opening his eye, he shivered at the other's rapt attention, swallowing heavily. "Show me. Before I think of another reason to stop you."

Tyki hummed softly, pressing gently through the faint resistance of his muscles. "Then think of something else, Lovely.. Like how very good this is going to be." Curling his fingers slightly, he growled at the redhead's broken cry, stroking the rise of his prostate. "Do you remember the last time you were like this, Lavi..? I could do what I did then, if you asked me to.."

The Exorcist shook his head rapidly, his fingers sunk deep in the material of their blanket. "No.. Not this time. It was good then, but.." Forcing himself to relax, he sighed breathlessly. "This time, I don't want anything to keep me from holding on to you."

Lifting his arms, he reached for the startled brunette with a faint smile. "Now..? I promise its enough, Tyki." Wincing at the man's uncertainty, he cupped his palm carefully beneath his jaw, urging him down for a slow kiss. Catching his breath, he kept their mouthes close enough to brush the older man's lips as he spoke. "I'm scared to death, you know.. But I want you to prove me wrong."

Withdrawing his hand, Tyki allowed himself to be pulled closer, pausing to retrieve the container of oil. Frowning at the odd unsteadiness of his movements, he poured the cool liquid into his cupped palm, reclosing the bottle and setting it aside. "There's nothing to be afraid of, Lovely. Its the same as everything else, only.. More. Or maybe less, of some things." He covered himself patiently, inhaling sharply at the redhead's sudden grip on his shoulder and waist. "What..?"

Laughing shakily, the Exorcist shook his head. "Less talking would be good.. And less waiting." Closing his eye, he repeated his gentle kiss, lifting himself to meet the other's cautious movements. Surprised by the lack of pain, he rocked upward, tightening his arms with an encouraging sound.

The brunette shivered at his eagerness, sliding deeper with a moan. "Gods, Lavi.." Catching the boy's mouth, he shifted a hand to his hip, stroking the skin as he began to move. Lifting his head, he exhaled roughly at the redhead's answering motions, his hand slipping around to press against his arched waist. "More of this could be dangerous.. It makes me wonder how much better it would be if you truly wanted it.."

Whimpering softly, the Exorcist shook his head. "I do want it! You aren't making me-" He gasped at the man's tight hold, his legs shaking against the other's sides as he arched pleadingly. "I mean it, I want this..!"

The brunette held his slow pace, adjusting his angle until the boy cried out wordlessly, his eye hazed with pleasure. "I know you do, but I didn't mean it like that.. I wondered how it would feel if your whole heart were in it, Lovely." He leaned in, closing his eyes at the redhead's low whine. "Its odd that I want to know.. I never wondered with anyone else, but you.."

Shuddering at his quiet words, Lavi struggled to speak around the lump in his throat. "Don't..! Don't tell me that now, I.." Drawing a breath, he locked his arms around the man's back, burying his face against his neck and shoulder. "I promise I'll try, so please.. Don't make me hate myself when you feel so good.."

The older man shook his head faintly, urging the Exorcist to relax. "But now is the best time, Lavi.. And you shouldn't be guilty for the things you don't feel." He lifted the boy higher, growling at the brief press of his nails. "You should concentrate on this, Lovely.. You and I, here and now."

Bucking into the man's steady movements, Lavi moaned, his fingers digging into the other's back. "But I.. I want to know too! If you.. It couldn't be better, I'd- Tyki!" He tightened his legs around the brunette's waist, his back bent into a shaking arch. "Like that, Oh God please..!"

Hissing at the desperate pitch of his voice, Tyki braced himself on one arm, catching his lifted hips with the other. "Not yet, Lovely.. I know you want it, but this time.." He bent as close as he was able, holding the boy's wide-eyed stare. "This time, I want you to need it."

Crying out sharply, Lavi dropped his arms to the ground, pushing himself up to catch the man's mouth. Swallowing his astonished gasp, he licked at the other's lips and tongue, grinding their bodies together with a whimper. Feeling the brunette's arm clench around his hips, he pulled back to speak. "I already need it.. Can't you feel..?" He sank backwards, using his grip to bring the older man down to cover him. Raising his legs higher along the other's sides, he took hold of his shoulders with a broken moan.

Tyki intensified his movements in reply, panting at the Exorcist's plaintive sounds. "Only a little longer, Lavi..? You can't wait at all?"

Lavi shook his head rapidly, his voice breathless and urgent. "I don't want to, but- I think I'm gonna come without you.." He lifted himself to press against the older man's body, every muscle drawn tight as he choked. "Its never been this good, I can't.." He bit his lip hard enough to bruise the skin, closing his eye with a growl of frustration. "Stop," He rasped, ignoring the clamor of his body. "Tyki, stop!"

Wrapping his arms around the man's neck, he jerked him down, his legs tightening likewise to hold the other still. Shivering with denied arousal, he breathed deeply before attempting to speak. "I don't want it to be like that.." He whispered, blinking rapidly. "Its supposed to be different! It can't always be like this, not if we're going to..try.."

Tyki nodded, pushing carefully against the boy's arms. "I understand. But it is different, Lovely.." Sliding backward, he hissed at the redhead's brief clench around him, thrusting forward shallowly. "Better, and so much harder to- Please, Lavi.. Tell me what to do, because I think I'll go mad if you make me stop."

He repeated his gentle movements, moaning breathlessly at the other's quiet whimper. "Tell me, Lovely.. Is this what you wanted..?" The Exorcist's heels dug shakily into his back, the act drawing him both closer and deeper. Growling in reply, he slipped an arm beneath the boy's body, supporting his hips as he leaned down to lick a slow line along the redhead's collarbone, his breath cooling the damp skin as he panted. "There's no need to hold yourself back, not when I'm just as close as you are.."

Burying a hand into the man's hair, Lavi fumbled awkwardly with the loose tie that held it, tugging it free and casting it aside. Cupping the back of his head, he pulled him up, his free hand moving to touch as much of the other's skin as he could reach. Speaking between short, hungry kisses, he struggled to form coherent words. "Not..without you! Please, Tyki-"

The brunette shuddered roughly, his fingers digging into the boy's skin. "Please what, Lavi..? Tell me what you want!"

Using his grip around the man's waist, Lavi rocked upward to match his quickening rhythm, pushing his head down to speak directly into his ear. "I want you to let go, Tyki.." He moaned breathlessly, fingers tangling loosely into the man's hair. "You said I'm yours.. Am I, really?"

The older man nodded rapidly, his arms tight around the Exorcist's lifted hips. "Mine. You gave yourself..to..Lavi!" He cried out sharply at the boy's hard nip to the side of his throat, his movements faltering as the redhead sucked firmly at the stinging skin. "Don't.. do that, I'll-"

Lifting his head, Lavi pulled him in for a possessive kiss, bucking into his stilted thrusts urgently. "You left your mark.. And so did I. You're mine, Tyki." Wrapping his arms around the man's back, he gasped. "Please let me feel you.. Come for me?"

The brunette's eyes widened fractionally, so dark with pleasure that they almost appeared black as he nodded jerkily. "For you, Lovely.. Because this feels so real- Oh, God!" Clutching the Exorcist roughly to him, he buried himself as deeply as he was able, the abrupt movement drawing a choked scream from the redhead as his muscles locked viciously around the man inside him. The shuddering clench of the boy's body destroyed what bit of control he may have still had, his eyes closed tight as he matched his lover's harsh cry of completion.

Still shivering with faint sparks of erotic flame, Lavi lifted his back with a breathy whimper, sighing in contentment as the older man shifted his arms to the side, one sliding carefully beneath the Exorcist's head to support him. Winding shaky fingers into the brunette's sweat-dampened hair, he urged him down for a soft kiss, moaning at the lazy sweetness of it.

Feeling the other begin to move backward, he tightened his legs gently, shaking his head. "Not yet.. Please? Just a little longer.." He laughed almost drunkenly at the man's slow nod, nuzzling against his shoulder with a quiet hum. "M'sorry, I just.. I think I hate that."

He relaxed his grip, blinking at the near-perfect darkness around them. "That was.. What was that, Tyki? Any word I think of doesn't match.." The older man pushed himself to his elbows, pausing for a moment at the Exorcist's anxious sound.

"I'm not going anywhere, Lovely.. Not until you want me to." He regarded the boy seriously, his look softening into a faint smile at the redhead's relieved expression. "Does it need a definition, Lavi? Giving it a name won't change anything, will it?" Leaning down to press his lips to the boy's own, he sighed. "If you must, think of it as.. Incentive." Seeing the Exorcist's eyebrow lift curiously, he chuckled. "If there were feelings involved, it would have been even better. Every bit of it."

Suppressing a shiver, the redhead bit his lip. "How do you know?" He murmured, averting his gaze. "You said you don't know if you can.. have feelings for someone either, so.." The thought of the older man having detailed knowledge on the subject was almost worthy of tears, but he knew that mere saltwater had no hope of expressing the anguish he felt. Forcing his voice to be steady, he turned back to face the man squarely.

"Was there.. Did you love somebody else? I mean, someone that made you think you couldn't anymore?" He flinched at the surprised look on the brunette's face, feeling his cheeks heat uncomfortably. "Is that how you know what it's like..?"

As soon as the words were spoken, he cursed himself silently for asking. Bracing himself for the obvious response, he wondered how long it would be before the hurting stopped.

Something in his expression must have given him away, the older man's eyebrows lifting as the silence stretched on. Tilting his head, the brunette raised a hand to push the hair away from the boy's face. "Are you jealous, Lavi..?" He sensed rather than saw the Exorcist shrink from the question, his eye widening at the other's quiet voice. Leaning closer, he frowned slightly. "Don't be. It wasn't like this at all."

Feeling the boy stiffen beneath him, he shook his head. "I mean it wasn't physical, Lovely. Even I had friends, once." He sighed quietly, stroking the redhead's cheek with a finger. "I know that things seemed better when they were with me, and worse when they were gone. Its the same feeling, without being romantic, yes?" He laughed quietly, shaking his head again. "Was this better than that first time, Lavi?"

The Exorcist nodded slowly, wincing at the reference. "Yeah.. A lot better, but-"

Tyki smiled, shifting until they were eye to eye. "Why? Didn't you really want me then, even though you said you didn't? Why would this time, or any of the others be different?" He sighed, relaxing into the boy's hold. "I've loved people before, but I don't think I could say I've ever been in love. Not the way you're imagining it."

Lavi blinked at the tone of his voice, his arms tightening around the man's shoulders. "I'm sorry.. That I asked and that you haven't."

The brunette hummed questioningly, carding a hand absently through the boy's hair. "Its no great loss, Lovely. One can't really miss something they've never had.. Isn't it the same for you?"

The Exorcist shook his head firmly, frowning. "It's not. I really can't miss it, but that's because I don't even know what it is. You know, so it's worse-" He faltered at the older man's calm stare, clearing his throat. "You deserve it. You shouldn't be alone." He laughed anxiously, closing his eye. "That's one more reason that you should have picked someone else, you know.. You could do a lot better."

Tyki moved backward, wincing at the other's momentary clutch and release. Reaching for the bottom edge of the blanket, he wiped himself somewhat clean, doing the same for the boy's stomach. Drawing the redhead closer, he tugged the excess material over them, settling beside him with a contented sigh. "I highly doubt that, Lavi.. You seem to suit me rather well." Stroking the Exorcist's bare back, he smiled faintly. "You shouldn't belittle yourself, Lovely. The good things about you outweigh the bad by far."

Feeling the redhead take a breath to protest, he pressed a finger to the boy's lips. "Let it stand, Lavi. My opinion is just that, not a point to be argued.. Besides, didn't we have this same talk about me? You seem to think very highly of me, when I can only see the ills I've done."

Lavi nodded, scooting just a bit closer. "All right, then. Do you really think we could come back here again..? I mean, you don't have to take me places all the time, but-"

The brunette laughed, shaking his head. "I wouldn't mind having you with me, anytime you wished it.. And I most certainly wouldn't object to returning, especially in light of.. Pleasant associations with the place." He urged the boy's face up, meeting his gaze. "If there is someplace you wish to go, tell me. Don't think of yourself as a prisoner, Lovely."

The Exorcist's eye widened in surprise, then narrowed. "But that's exactly what I am.. You don't know me well enough to call me anything else, Tyki." He sighed, shaking his head slowly. "I don't think I want you to know.. Being a Bookman isn't like anything else. No matter what I knew was going to happen, all I could do was watch.. And then I had to learn not to care about anything but the facts. We didn't look at the people, it was like they were.. Irrelevant."

He shuddered briefly, gritting his teeth at the twisting sensation of nausea. "Doing that was awful, but.. I think the worst part is never being able to forget it. I remember every single detail, you know? Even when I didn't care, I remembered those people."

The older man blinked at the utter self-loathing in the redhead's voice, opening his mouth to speak. Before the comforting words could emerge, the boy cut him off.

"You think you're evil because you've killed people, right?" He didn't wait for the brunette to reply, closing his eye with a humorless laugh. "Me, too. Hundreds of them. Maybe even thousands." His voice shook slightly, but he cleared his throat and pressed on. "At least you looked them in the face, Tyki. Gramps and I, we just kept our Goddamned mouthes shut and looked right through them."

Now his voice did crack, and the sound seemed to mock him as he fell silent. Tyki waited for the span of two breaths, then shook his head.

"Killing someone and allowing someone to die are different, Lavi. It might not feel like it now, but it is." He ignored the boy's sharp inhale, his arm wrapping securely around the other's waist. Resting his face against the Exorcist's hair, he sighed. "You never wanted to hurt anyone, that's why it could never be the same thing."

Lavi accepted the one-armed embrace, his eye still closed as he nodded reluctantly. "Maybe not, but.. I don't want to be like that anymore. Even if I have to remember what I saw, I'd rather feel bad about it than feel nothing."

The brunette hummed in understanding, stroking the cooled skin of the boy's back. "Do you want to go now, Lovely..? Its getting cold, not to mention late." Feeling the other's reluctant nod, he smiled. "I promise we'll come back, Lavi.. Many times."

Rising to sit, he retrieved their castoff clothing, passing the Exorcist's over before reaching for his own. After a momentary tussle with his pants, he turned to address his companion. "Would you like to go with me tomorrow as well, Lovely? No matter what I say, I do feel rather obligated to continue visiting.."

Tugging awkwardly at his boots, the redhead nodded. "Anytime you feel like company, Tyki. But no more bimbo killing, ok? I'll keep my jokes to myself, honest." Laughing at the man's arch look, he stood, offering a hand. "Come on, let's go before you catch a chill.. I'd be a lousy nurse."

Smirking, the brunette rose to his feet, glancing deliberately over the boy's figure. "Perhaps.. But with a little padding up top-"

The Exorcist swiped at him halfheartedly, laughing despite himself. "Right. Just as soon as we find a backless apron for you, O Fearsome One." Folding their blanket haphazardly, he stuffed it back into the knapsack, slinging it over his shoulder. "I hope you don't need your space, Tyki.. For some reason, I feel like being clingy."

Laughing, the older man shook his head, wrapping his arms around the boy's middle firmly. Lowering his head, he paused just shy of touching, a smile evident in his voice. "Space is highly overrated, Lovely." Feeling oddly pleased with himself, he closed the scarce distance between them, hoping that the boy's sleep would be much more peaceful tonight than it had seemed before.

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Well, there's some more. Hope you all enjoyed it after the long wait.

O, and about the disclaimer up top? Totally meant that. Please review if you fave/alert add me, or you might find all my stuff moved exclusively to my group's website. Ja ne!

As always, please comment!

Well well well.. Nightmare Game 7

2009-04-15T02:26:40Z

Wow.. I bet you all thought I died. But unfortunately I didn't. Hate to post this right on top of a fellow AssHat member's post, but I'm tired of all the yowling XD

Nightmare Game

A D.Gray-Man Fanfiction

By SisterWicked

Chapter 7 - Fever Dream

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Tyki shifted carefully, glancing down at the boy sprawled against his side. The redhead's face was relaxed in sleep, his breathing deep and even. Allowing his eyes to roam over the Exorcist's nude body, he shook his head, tugging the sheet up to his waist with a sigh. Turning onto his side, he propped himself up on one elbow, his gaze settling on the boy's bright hair, its color made even more brilliant against the dark material of the pillow.

Lifting a hand to the loose strands, he cautiously stroked his fingers over the coppery-hued swath, noting the surprisingly thick texture. He was stricken by the utter contrast of the boy's hair against his own olive-toned skin, for the first time truly seeing the form that his revenge had taken.

Though his various memories of the boy assured him that his body was usually well-covered, his skin retained a sun-darkened appearance, the shade slightly darker along his arms and face. Closer inspection of the Exorcist's nose and cheeks revealed an almost transparent smattering of freckles, their innocuous presence drawing a quiet laugh from the older man. Shaking his head at his own foolishness, he continued his impromptu study, following the shape of the boy's face with similar attention. His feature were definitely masculine, but the effect was softened by the line of his chin and jaw, his mouth curved impishly even when at rest.

Feeling suddenly awkward, Tyki moved his hand away from the peaceful figure, a sensation of despondent guilt weighing heavily on him as he shuddered. The boy's obvious charms aside, he truly seemed to be an honest person, despite his assertions of unworthiness. Recalling his genuine remorse for his prior actions, the brunette winced in self-loathing. 'I should never have done this,' He thought, closing his eyes. 'Of all his fellows, he is the least to blame for what the Order has done.. Nothing he did was spurred by malice, even his battle with Rhode.'

Feeling the boy stir, he looked quickly at his face, frowning at the sharply knit line of his brow. As he watched, the redhead shuddered briefly, his hands clenching tightly against the bedding. Reaching forward hesitantly, Tyki pressed a hand to the other's back, jumping in surprise when the boy moved closer. Blinking down at the top of the Exorcist's head, he pushed down his amusement, allowing the boy to settle himself before tugging the sheet higher to cover them both. A soft murmur of appreciation met his gesture, but the mildly troubled expression remained, causing the older man to wonder what he saw that could disturb him so.

'He called me beautiful..' He mused, closing his eyes with a silent laugh. 'I took him away from everything he had, used him like a whore, and he calls me beautiful..' Remembering the boy's indignant tirade, his thoughts sobered, and he recalled the first time he'd seen the boy in his white form.

Though his attention had initially been fixed on the boy's white-haired companion, a quick flash of color at the edge of his vision had drawn his eyes repeatedly to the other's brightly colored hair, distracting him from his rapidly mounting losses. When he had finally realized the extent of his now-reversed debt, he had internally chided himself for his interest, ignoring the quick spike of arousal at the boy's rather pleasantly formed features. The second time he'd seen the boy had been in battle, with a new uniform and a glint in his eye, the rage at his companion's seeming death still fresh enough to leave a raw edge to his hateful banter.

Past then his memory was intermittent, details of their final two meetings bleeding together until the point of his abrupt change in form. He could remember the boy standing before him in the last tower of the crumbling Ark, and he knew that Rhode had sealed him within her nightmare dimension, but his fight with the Walker boy had taken all of his concentration prior to the boy's evolution. The pain of having his inner self run through made clear memory impossible, but the awakening of his true nature had brought him face to masked face with the redhead for one last fight.

He had no memory of the smaller details of that battle, save an impression of fear and heat and blood.. the latter more of a tactile memory than a true impression. He remembered the boy kneeling painfully on the shattered floor, and the sweetly metallic taste of blood in his mouth.. Then there was nothing, until the Earl had retrieved him from the field and carried him away to be healed. The implantation of his sibling's Memories obscured all recollection between his revival and that awakening, though a single look at himself in a mirror had shown him that much time had passed between those instants.

His reverie was broken by a jerky movement beside him, the boy's sleepy murmur sounding suspiciously like a name as he sighed. The Exorcist stirred again, rolling from his side to his stomach, the sheets sliding down to reveal the smooth expanse of his back to the curve of his hip. Tyki followed the faint ridges of his spine with his eyes, the relaxed muscles slack beneath skin that he found himself suddenly itching to touch. Remembering the way that skin had felt beneath his palms, slick with sweat and sprinkled with gooseflesh, the muscles tense and shaking.. Even the ragged sound of his voice was recalled with enough clarity to make the older man's pulse quicken with dizzying lust. Jumping in surprise, he found his arm already half extended toward the object of his scrutiny.

He lay perfectly still, his hand less than an inch from the boy's exposed skin. The urge to harm and frighten the Exorcist had faded to nothing, as if the others inside him had seen his resolve and changed track to accommodate it. The feeling now was to keep and have, to make this person belong utterly to him.

For an instant, he wanted that, to take everything that the boy was and have it for his own, but the deep coloring of the mark on his throat drove the thought from him, a fresh wave of self-hatred taking him as he shuddered. 'I will not.. Even at the start, I wanted him to choose it.' The thought made him pause, his hand shaking where it still hovered over the other's back. 'But he did.. After what I've done, before I did this thing.. But he can't possibly have meant it, no pleasure I could give would replace an entire life..'

Watching the steady rise and fall of his breath, he realized that he knew almost nothing about this boy, not even his age. That thought was deeply unnerving, his gaze fixing intently on the other's half-obscured features in something very like horror. He could remember the way he'd looked when they'd first met, with his dark uniform concealing the lines and maturity of his body.. And the bandana that he himself had removed, it had held the boy's surprisingly long hair out of his eye while also downplaying the youthful shape of his face.

Leaning back, he studied the Exorcist closely, his chest tight as he admitted to himself that despite his worldly manner and behavior, the boy was almost painfully young. Calculating the time from first glance to now, he shuddered in utter disgust at himself, snatching his hand away with a low sound of distress.

He had raped a child.

Struggling to calm his quickened breathing, he shook his head. 'Not a child, but not far beyond it.. He can't have been less than seventeen on that train..' The logic did little to quell his rising panic, imagining Rhode as she had been, and even Jasdero and Devit, what any of his kin would have felt had this been done to their youngest..

His shaking intensified even as those youngest awakened within him, their presence for once alarmed and placating rather than malevolent or enraged. The sharp sting of sweat beading on his nearly-healed back was nauseating, the dull ache reminding him of how the injury had come to be.

He had taken this boy, a person closer to those he had loved than to the ones he hated, and forced him to pay a price far beyond his owing, over and over in so short a time.. And he had made him beg and plead for every moment of it, had made him enjoy it as if his pleasure in the act excused it. In his sorrow and madness, he had changed from the victim of the Order into something far worse.

He had become the monster that he had always feared.

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In his dreams, it seemed as if much more than a week had passed, his unfailing memory of the older man's expressions and mannerisms adding depth to his place in the boy's emerging impression of him. Despite the scarce opportunities to study the other's routine, his soft-spoken nature was clearly at odds with the near-vicious persona of before, making the sleeping Exorcist spin layer upon layer of supposed meaning to the change.

Mentally replaying his patient chore of letterwriting, the older man had shown that he was amiable toward things he saw as obligatory, but his passionate denial of harmful intent had given rise to an entirely new set of questions..

Sinking further into the displaced musings of sleep, Lavi wondered how it could be so simple, after what had happened between them. There was no lingering resentment, save that bit he held for himself, but it was far overshadowed by an unsettling sense of triumph, the feeling that he had finally been allowed to take a place of his own choosing, beside the one person he had never thought to have.

'Now do you see? All you had to do was stretch out your hand, but you lacked the will.'

He could almost hear the smile in the words, but what it meant was beyond him. "I know it now.. But does it always have to be.. like that? You made me hurt him, and I never meant-" A dry laugh cut him off, but the tone of the thoughts was unchanged.

'I didn't make you do anything, you did it all on your own.. But he liked it, didn't he? He's less delicate than you'd like to imagine, does that trouble you now?'

He shuddered briefly, pressing a hand to his aching temple. "He's strong on the outside, but there's something in him that isn't! If he was like that to the core, he would never have asked me to.." Controlling his defensiveness, he sighed. "He hasn't treated me like a prisoner, though.. He'd let me go, I'm sure! I just don't.."

'Oh, I know.. You don't want to go, not when there's nothing outside to go back to. Make this your place, then. Take what you wish from him until there's nothing left, and there's your place.'

Taking a breath, he shook his head. "Why does it always have to be take? This isn't about that, it's about-"

'Keeping. Having. If you could, wouldn't you rather have him offer..?'

He jumped in surprise at the soft voice, turning in the darkness to locate its source as it continued.

'You could make that happen, without taking by force.. Give him a reason to want it, and he'd never set you aside.'

Their point caught his attention, dispelling his anxiety at the sudden interjection. "Without.. But how? I don't know what to say, or what to do! How do I make him want something that I don't remember feeling myself?" There was a moment of silence, and he felt himself near awakening, but a quiet murmur drew him back to rest.

'You could remember.. If you let me, I'll give you everything that you need. Wouldn't it be better, to give something back? We've been kind, haven't we? You only think it was never there..'

He forced his thoughts into order, nodding. "I've pretended to.. But that wasn't real! It was just a part of the person I was, it wasn't the same as wanting to make someone happy!" Breathing deeply, he sighed. "I don't want anymore hurting.. If you'd just show me how to lie, it isn't worth it."

'You wouldn't be lying, if you meant it.. You want to give him that much, and he wants to have it. He needs it, doesn't he? You promised to try, so we will.'

Nodding again, he closed his eye. "As long as you don't make me say something I don't mean.. Help me. Show me what I used to know, so I can help him." Relaxing his will, he cast his thoughts back to a place he'd been for only a few weeks, a tiny village that met it's destruction under the boots of an advancing army. He'd worked with his master as an errand runner, a job that had allowed him to deliver critical information to the commanders of one side while the elder Bookman had done likewise for the opposite forces, his earnest and softspoken persona lending a nondescript air to his presence as the recipients had discussed their plans.

'We were always so kind to the lessers.. They told us more than any of the letters we read. We carried messages for them too, and they depended on us for advice.. He's the same, isn't he? He wants you to prove to him that even he can be worthwhile. If someone he believes to be good wanted him, he'd value himself more.'

Absorbing the logic in the statement, he agreed silently, allowing the faint sense of that other person to become clearer. There was a wrenching sensation within him, but far less distressing than the previous one, and he shuddered at the oddness of it. "Should I.. Wake up? I can't really tell what time it's supposed to be.." The response seemed somehow closer, not quite in his mind, but not outside, either.

'The time doesn't matter. Sleep more, I already know what to do.. You hurt yourself, didn't you? I won't let him find out, I'll do something to keep him from asking any questions we'd need to lie about.'

Sighing in relief, he was surprised at the depth of his exhaustion, but he knew firsthand that mental tasks were always more tiring than purely physical ones. "All right.. But I want to see what you do, so I won't really be asleep, will I?" The feeling of laughter was indescribable, but somehow not frightening.

'Watch us, then.. It's easier to have someone else doing all the recording. Do you hear something..?'

He frowned briefly, wondering when the faint sound had begun. "You can't hear while you're asleep, I think I'm about to wake-"

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Jerking awake, he blinked at the feeling of shaking beside him, looking up at the other man in concern. "Tyki..? What's wrong? Are you still-" He broke off as the brunette shook his head quickly, drawing back from his outstretched hand.

"Don't! You shouldn't be here, Lavi.." Shuddering in revulsion, he closed his eyes. "You're only.. How old are you, Lovely? How long has it been, since I saw you that first time? I never even knew your name.." He clenched his hands tightly, leaning away from the astonished Exorcist. "I should have stopped this before it even began, why would you choose to be here after what I've done?"

Pushing himself up, Lavi took hold of his shoulders, refusing to let him pull away. "Stop it. I already told you why, didn't I? And why does it matter how old I am, as long as I'm not... Wait, how old did you think I was?" Sliding forward, he forced the man to meet his gaze with a gentle shake. "I'll be twenty this summer, if I don't get myself killed before then. You're what, twenty seven or so? That's not enough of a difference to worry about.." He released his hold slowly, lifting his hands to cup the man's face. "Don't be like this, Tyki. I meant what I said, about everything.. I honestly think you're the first person I ever really wanted to be with this way."

Watching the brunette's eyes widen in surprise, he blushed faintly. "It wasn't emotional, but still.. Who wouldn't want you, after seeing you half naked? You know how good you look." He laughed at the man's shock, shaking his head. "I might not have a heart, but I sure as Hell have everything else.. But you already know that, don't you? It hasn't been that long, but there isn't much of me that you haven't seen already." Moving closer, he caught the older man's mouth with his own, urging him to respond with a slow stroke of his tongue against the seam of his lips.

Feeling his cautious acceptance, he deepened the kiss questioningly, lowering a hand to press against the man's chest as he sucked briefly at his lower lip. "Does your back still hurt, Tyki..? I'd like to look at it, if you'd let me.." He smiled at the other's dazed nod, climbing across his legs to sit behind him on the bed. Biting his lip, he frowned at the still-visible criss-cross of scratches, though all but one were nearly faded to nothingness. Tracing the length of it with his finger, he sighed. "This one's not like the rest.. I'm sorry for doing that, even if you don't care." He leaned forward, pressing his lips to the skin just above the scrape. Hearing the brunette's quick gasp, he hummed curiously, repeating the light touch along the mark. "Is it sore..?"

Tyki shook his head jerkily, shivering at the feeling of the redhead's slow progress toward his nape. "Lovely, I don't think you should.. Oh.."

Brushing the man's hair aside, he kissed the ending point of the scratch, burying his nose in the lightly scented hollow where neck and skull met. "Why not? I shouldn't want to make it better?" He slid his arms around the other's chest, splaying his fingers across the skin to hold him still. "You don't want me to..? I'll leave you alone if you'd rather.."

Taking hold of the Exorcist's hands, Tyki inclined his head just enough to glance backward. "I wouldn't rather, that's the problem. You don't have to do that, Lavi." He closed his eyes at the boy's breath on his skin, still reluctant to enjoy the feeling. "Don't do anything for my sake, not unless you truly wish to.." Nodding faintly, the redhead shifted his attention to the side of his throat, his voice only loud enough to be understood.

"I wouldn't do it if I didn't want to, but that isn't the point. Do you not like to be touched that way? If its too much, say so." He followed the line of the brunette's pulse carefully, pausing at the silent tenseness of his muscles. "Is this something that needs feeling to be all right..? I haven't been with anyone else, so I don't know if there's a limit to what people do when they aren't.. Together."

Leaning forward, Tyki turned around to face him, his hold on the boy's hands almost painfully tight. "No, Lovely! I didn't mean it like that, you don't need to worry about feeling anything! Do what pleases you, whenever you like.." He loosened his grip at the other's wince, shaken at the mixed guilt and arousal that came from the Exorcist's hesitant efforts. "Anything you would allow me to do, that's the only limit. Lovers set boundries on their own, Lavi."

Smiling faintly, the redhead nodded. "Anything I'd let you do..? Then.." He leaned in, stopping just shy of the other's face. "I'd let you kiss me, if you wanted to.." Closing his eye, he pressed his lips to the corner of the man's mouth, sighing. "I'd let you touch me, too.. But you always ask me what I want, Tyki. What do you want, really?"

He waited patiently for the brunette to answer, lifting a hand to draw meaningless designs on the skin of his chest. "Why don't you take a minute to think about it..? I'm pretty sure I can find something to occupy myself with." Moving slowly, he bent his head to replace fingers with lips, the sound of the other's quick breaths blending with his own soft hum. "I wonder.. We used the same soap, but on you it smells completely different.. Almost like liquorice." He licked across the dip of the older man's breastbone, lingering over a place that made him gasp. "Mm.. I always did like that flavor.."

Taking hold of the redhead's shoulders, Tyki pushed him back quickly, shaking his head. "Why are you doing this, Lovely..? It's too soon for any more of-" He faltered at the boy's pained expression, struggling for an explaination that would make him understand his reluctance. "You don't need to prove your willingness, Lavi.. There's more than enough time for us to talk about what bothers us, so.."

The Exorcist nodded faintly, allowing himself to be moved. "So you really don't.. Was I that bad, yesterday..? I know things like that get better with practice, but.. I won't do it again until you ask, Tyki. I just thought.." He bit his lip, cutting himself off. "I'm sorry, for not doing it right."

Stunned at his depreciating tone, the older man tightened his grip. "No, I didn't mean.. You didn't do anything wrong, Lovely. What bothers me is why you did it at all, you shouldn't have been here to do anything with me!" He forced himself to meet the redhead's surprised gaze, internally flinching from the lack of fear in the other's eye. "Nothing I can do will change the fact that it was wrong of me to bring you here. Even if you say you wanted me, I didn't give you any choice at all! I used you like that, and you would have.. let.. Oh, Gods." He closed his eyes tightly, unable to continue past the sickness he felt.

"That's a lie."

The quiet words brought his inner struggle to a halt, his head lifting as he stared at the boy in surprise. "What..?"

Lavi clenched his hands into shaking fists, calming himself with a deep breath. "You gave me a choice. You always do, every time you've touched me was the same! There's always something, an offer to stop, or a warning.. And every time you ask what I want, it's like you're asking if I want you." He gripped the other's hands firmly, pulling him forward with a frown. "This is the same, Tyki. You aren't doing anything to force me, not even saying things to make me want you. I wanted to try for myself, but I don't know enough about you to see if you want.. It's fine that you'd let me do things, but I would rather wait until you want me to touch you."

Sighing, he rose to his knees, closing his arms around the older man's shoulders loosely. "I know that I don't have to do things like this, but why can't I want to? Am I not supposed to think about it, since you don't think you deserve that? I only wanted to make you feel good.. You really don't want me to?" He dropped his arms to his sides, sinking back to sit on his bent legs. "It's almost like you still think I'm lying.. Would you ever believe me, Tyki? You say I don't need to prove it, but.. What would it take, to make you trust me?"

Averting his face, he glanced at the man's stricken expression from the corner of his vision, shaking his head. "I don't have any right to ask you to, really.. If you call yourself a monster, then what am I? You thought it would make you better if you humiliated me, but I didn't have any excuse for wanting you.."

Ignoring a faint jolt of alarm from his resting self, he laughed. "Its sort of ironic, that you'd find me first.. What you did wasn't really punishment, but having you not want me.. Do you think that would help you? You wouldn't have to do anything to me at all, and I'd still be-"

Tyki cut him off abruptly, jerking him into an almost painful embrace. "No..! I don't want that anymore, you aren't the one I should have taken!" Closing his eyes, he missed the slight upward curve of the Exorcist's mouth as he cupped the back of his head gently. "I don't know what to do now, Lovely. I'd be lying if I said that I don't want you, but I can't bring myself to ask for anything.."

Forcing down a smile, Lavi nuzzled at his throat, returning his hold. "If you never asked, how would I know..? Would you tell me if I asked?" Feeling the man inhale sharply, he sighed. "I was going to lick you, before.. Do you want me to do that, Tyki?" He hummed softly at the quickened beat of the other's pulse against his lips. "You wouldn't have to worry about hurting me, and you could return the favor later, if you really wanted to.."

Lifting his head, he met the brunette's gaze squarely. "I promise I'll be better than I was.. And I promise I'll stop if you tell me to. Do you want it..?" He leaned forward slightly, trailing his fingers along the man's stomach. Watching his eyes widen in surprise, he lowered his hand to cup the hardened skin of his arousal, closing his eye with a quiet murmur. "Tell me why you can't ask me for something I already want.."

Shuddering breathlessly at the careful pressure of his grip, the older man shook his head faintly. "I want it too, Lavi.. Please..? I want you to.. Oh, Gods please."

Pushing gently against the brunette's chest, the Exorcist urged him backwards, moving to rest between his spread knees. "You don't have to beg, Tyki.. I told you I wanted to." He slid back, pausing to lick at the man's navel teasingly. "Show me what you like, so I'll know how to do this next time.." Taking hold of the other's hips, he glanced upward briefly, biting his lip at the openly pleading look in his eyes. Feeling his sleeping other flinch guiltily, he shivered. "Please, Tyki. Don't think about anything else right now.."

Bending his head, he traced the tip of the man's erection with his tongue, his grip careful but firm as he repeated the motion steadily. Hearing his soft moan, he closed his mouth around the heated skin, jumping slightly at the sensation of fingers against the back of his head. The older man's faint shudders increased along with the Exorcist's efforts, his breathless noises growing louder and less coherant as he threaded his hands deeper into the boy's hair.

Pulling away slightly, the redhead licked at his skin teasingly, kneading the man's hips with his fingers. "I really do like this." He murmured, sucking lightly at the bend of the other's leg. "I love the way your skin feels on my tongue.." He drew a line from base to tip, moaning faintly. "I don't want it to end, but God, I want to taste you.."

Tyki panted rapidly, his eyes closed in disbelieving pleasure. Tugging the boy down, he gasped at his immediate compliance, the feeling of his lips driving a spike of need up his spine as he bucked upward with a rasping whisper. "Please, Lovely.. You're going to make me come so hard.."

Humming an eager affirmative, Lavi moved his left hand to stroke the tightened muscles of the man's thigh, the touch drawing an inarticulate plea from the other's lips as he arched away from the bed urgently, his fingers almost painful against the boy's scalp.

"Lavi..! Don't.. I'm almost.. Gods!"

Startled by the intensity of his response, the Exorcist forced down his own arousal, concentrating on the desperate pitch of the man's voice as he lingered over a place that made the other's breath catch audibly. Feeling his hips leave the mattress, he slid his hand down to support him with a muffled whimper, the answering growl leaving him shaken with the desire to satisfy his lover.

Realizing that the urge belonged to the half-dreaming self within him, he spared a momentary thought for the Exorcist, his movements unfaltering as he moaned. 'Can you hear..? It was this that you wanted to do for him, wasn't it?' Sensing the other's reluctant affirmative, he tightened his grip on the man's skin. 'He needs you to want him this much.. Show him that you do and he'll be ours.'

Turning his full attention to the man's lifted body, he intensified his efforts until the hands on his head became unsteady, the pronounced tremours giving proof of his approaching limit. The sting of his hair being held so tightly was almost shockingly arousing, the sound of the man's roughened voice driving him on despite the urge to seek his own pleasure. Ignoring his gasped warning, he sucked in a breath through his nose, the slight bitterness of his release ignored in favor of memorizing the tone of his impassioned cries.

Wiping his mouth carefully, he glanced toward the man's wide-eyed face, his smile both questioning and triumphant. "Better? I could always try again.."

The brunette panted softly, rising to his elbows with a faint laugh. "No, Lovely.. You've proven your point." He pushed himself upright, taking in the redhead's flushed cheeks. "I still don't think that I've done anything to deserve your concern, but thank you all the same, Lavi." Noting his slight frown, he shook his head, moving to pull the boy closer. "I won't dwell on it, if it troubles you.. Is there something you would rather discuss? Something like my returning the favor?"

Ignoring the quick leap of his pulse at the man's words, Lavi shook his head, allowing himself to be moved. "Aren't there any windows here? I know there have to be more than two rooms, since you've been going somewhere to get food.." He glanced around the half-lit bedroom, wincing at the almost bare appearance. "I just can't imagine staying like this for as long as you have, Tyki.. Even my room at the Order was more.. I don't know what to call it, it just didn't seem empty like this does."

The brunette shrugged faintly, wondering at his sudden curiosity. "Why would I surround myself with meaningless whatnots, Lovely? There's no one here to see, and I have everything I require.. Does it depress you?"

The Exorcist scowled at his tone. "I'd think it would depress you, since you're the one who comes home to it. Did you destroy Nyoibo?" The abrupt change of subject startled the older man for a moment, his eyes narrowing slightly.

"No. I only wanted to break you, Lovely.. But don't bother looking for your toy, I put it somewhere that you won't be able to enter." He tightened his hold when the boy leaned away, wondering if he should be on his guard.

Lavi struggled angrily, his expression thunderous. "Let go! I didn't ask for it, did I? I just wondered if you still had it! If you do, its another reason for you to trust me, because I wouldn't go anywhere without it!" He shoved himself back, growling in frustration. "I thought it might be nice to see the fucking sky before you decide that you don't require a roommate anymore, but I was obviously out of my mind to think that you'd-" He closed his mouth with a snap, taking a breath. "I don't want to fight with you, could you please let me up?"

Tyki blinked in surprise, releasing his grip. "The only way in or out of this place is with me, Lavi. The house itself exists in a place that no one else can reach. It doesn't matter if I trust you, there's no way for me to send you on your own."

The redhead's look was almost scornful. "I assumed you'd come with me, dammit! I didn't want to go galavanting off all by my happy self, I just thought you might know of someplace we could go that wouldn't be right in the middle of a bunch of people!" He shook his head in disgust. "Forget I said anything, Tyki. I only wanted to get you away from here for a little while, but like you said, you have everything you need right here."

The man's astonished face was like a slap, his open disbelief causing the boy to clench his hands tightly. "God, you really don't think my word's any good, do you? You think I'm gonna take the first chance I get and bolt.. I said I wanted to stay with you! I promised that I would, no matter what you end up doing to me! Fuck, if you think I'm plotting something, leave me here and go yourself!"

The frantic stirring of his other self went unheeded, his anger closing the connection between them as he raged. "I told you not to use me to hurt yourself, didn't I? What are you going to do, Tyki? Sleep with one eye open to be sure that I'm not going to try anything? Its just one more thing to worry about, having someone here that you have to watch every second!" He forced himself to stop, remembering his promise to help. "You still have some power, don't you? Destroy my hammer, if you think I can't be trusted. Its the only thing I could possibly use to hurt you."

The sharp pain of the statement carried over from his other, the Exorcist's anxiety impossible to ignore. "Its the only thing that's mine, you know. No one but me can use it, Nyoibo's like a part of me.. But I don't want it to be another excuse for you to stay like this." He shuddered in revulsion at the thought of losing his only remaining link to what he now was, allowing his other to come forward with a parting thought.

'Sometimes, you have to lose one thing to gain another.. Do you think he's worth more than that..?

The abrupt switch left the redhead dizzy, his vision fogged as he shook his head. Blinking rapidly, he met the older man's eyes almost fearfully, the tinge of gold there warning him that his next few words could be extremely dangerous. "It's something that you haven't taken, so.. Just don't make me watch you do it, please?"

Tyki flinched back from the pleading tone of his voice, his sudden anger diminishing at the offer. "I don't need to do that, Lavi.. And I don't believe its the only thing, really." He took a breath to calm himself, reining in the urge to do as the boy said. Closing his eyes, he relaxed. "I'll take you somewhere if you truly wish it, but there's something that needs doing before that.. Would you like to join me for that as well?" He smiled faintly at the Exorcist's eager nod, reaching for his arm with a quiet hum. Tugging the other forward, he caught his mouth firmly, pulling back with a gasp at the fervent response. "Goodness.. Are you so pleased to be going away from here, Lovely? There's something else that needs taken care of before either of the other things, I think.."

Lavi shook his head slowly, clutching the older man close as he shivered. "Not right now.. Can you wait until after..?"

Tyki smiled faintly, tightening his hold. "Honestly.. No. After what you did for me.. I don't think I could wait another minute, Lavi." He pulled the boy closer, stroking his hand along the edge of his hip. "I want you to understand something about me.. Not the Noah I was, but the man I am now.." Guiding the redhead up to straddle his legs, he bent down to lick along his racing pulse with a smile. "I never leave myself owing anything.. Why are you shaking, Lovely..?"

The Exorcist closed his eye tightly, taking a steadying breath. "I don't know." He mumbled, biting his lip. "You don't owe me anything, you know.. I didn't do it to get something from you, I just.." He faltered, shivering at the man's slow strokes against the skin of his back. "I wanted to make you understand, Tyki. It isn't about paying and repaying, I'm here because you gave me a choice and I made it."

He leaned into the man's chest with a sigh, resting his head in the crook of his neck. "Can I just stay like this for a minute..? Its like everything I say misses your brain.." The older man's quiet laughter made him smile ruefully, the loose strands of his hair tickling his nose. "You should pay more attention.. What if I actually say something smart one day? You'd be too busy molesting me to hear it."

Leaning back, he met the other's gaze evenly. "You can do all of that that you want, but don't do it unless you want to. And stop looking at me like you hate yourself, its a real mood killer."

Tyki blinked at him silently, his lip twitching faintly. "How would you have me look, Lavi..? Like I'm pleased to have taken you? You were the wrong one to choose for what I had intended, but.." He pushed firmly between the boy's shoulders, tipping his head to almost touch the other's lips. "You may be the right one for this." Ignoring the redhead's questioning noise, he licked at the corner of his mouth, smiling at the boy's confusion. "You missed a spot. Speaking of which.."

He kissed the Exorcist fiercely, his hands shifting to take hold of his hips. Lifting his head for a quick breath, he hummed at the wideness of the other's eye. "Would you be so hesitant if I told you that I wanted this for myself..? That I watched you sleeping and had to stop myself from ravishing you?"

The redhead's continued reluctance was apparant, making the older man pause. "Lovely, is there something wrong? You should tell me clearly, because empathy is not among my strong points."

Nodding regretfully, Lavi closed his eye. "It isn't like I don't want you, I just wish you'd take a little more time to think about it.. I wanted to do something just for you, without having anything in return. Does that make any sense?" He laughed at himself, rubbing his temples. "I just think that later would be the best time, especially if there's something you need to do.. It feels like it's pretty late already."

Smiling faintly, the brunette nodded, releasing his hold on the other. "It most likely is, Lavi. Its odd, but since you came, I tend to sleep much more than usual.. Perhaps its the increase in activity?"

Lavi flushed brightly enough to rival his hair, shaking his head. "Or maybe its just because you're doing something besides moping. Do you want to go, before you wear yourself out being funny?"

Ignoring the man's quiet laughter, he made his way to the bathroom, glancing at himself in the mirror. Though his face was still faintly tinged with pink, he could see the effects of his restless night, but the darkness beneath his eyes was much less pronounced than before. Sighing, he turned on the faucet, splashing his face with the cool water gratefully. Hearing the older man begin to collect their cast off clothing, he closed the door, reaching for a washcloth to clean what little evidence remained of the previous night's activities.

After tending to his skin, he took the opportunity to make use of the facilities, wincing at the soreness of his backside and thighs. Biting his lip, he searched for the salve he'd used before, covering his abused skin quickly. Returning the jar to its place, he looked critically at his borrowed clothes, deciding that the shirt would do, but the overly long pants may prove somewhat difficult to manage. He shrugged off his remaining stiffness, opening the door to find his companion already dressed and waiting by the bed.

"That was quick.. But I think we might have a little problem." The older man raised a curious eyebrow, taking in his less-than-clothed state with faint amusement.

"Indeed.. As much as I approve, I hardly think you're dressed for the occasion, Lovely." He laughed at the redhead's scowl, shaking his head. "If you don't mind waiting for a moment, I may be able to help with that, however.." Waving for the boy to sit, he left the room, making the Exorcist wonder exactly what he had in mind. After only a few minutes, he returned, handing the redhead his missing boots with a smile.

"Just as they were, Lavi.. As far as your pants.. Perhaps these would fit you better than my own." He presented the other with a sloppily folded pair of trousers, the cut and style distinctly different from the older man's clothing. Shaking them out, Lavi hummed curiously.

"Looks like they'd fit, but.. Aren't they a little.. Nevermind, I don't think I want to know."

Stifling his humor, Tyki nodded. "Most likely not.. But unless you wouldn't mind showing quite a bit of leg, there's really no alternative, Lavi."

Grumbling quietly, the Exorcist nodded, donning the slightly too-tight pants. Reaching for his boots, he gave the older man a sidelong look, snickering at the older man's obvious appraisal of his body. "Can we go, or d'you want to wait until you stop leering at me..?"

Bracing himself for the pain he knew would come, the brunette smiled. "We can go whenever you're ready, Lavi. I don't need anything else, unless you'd like something to sit on later..?" The Exorcist frowned at his teasing hint, the reference revealing nothing of his plans.

"I guess we should, since it's your clothes that'll be getting dirty if we don't." He muttered, waving toward the wardrobe. "Go on, then. Get whatever you think would be best."

Tyki nodded shortly, crossing the floor to open the tall chest. Reaching inside, he sifted aimlessly through the linens until he found a slightly threadbare quilt, pulling it out with a smirk. "This should be fine.. Now, where's that- Ah, here. That should do nicely." He straightened quickly, showing the boy an equally well-used satchel. "It's a bit awkward, but better than carrying a blanket with you, yes?"

Tucking the folded material into the bag, he moved to stand beside the boy, chuckling when he snatched the light burden from him and slung it impatiently over his shoulder. "As you will, Lovely.. Stand very still, I'd hate to lose half of you on the way.."

Taking hold of the other's arm, he willed them to the alley just beside their destination, taking care to check the street for pyring eyes before stepping out of the shadows. "Here we are.. Are you all right, Lovely? You look as if you're dizzy." Lavi shook his head faintly, following him into the late-afternoon sunlight.

Watching the redhead's expression turn curious, Tyki allowed him a moment to reorient himself, motioning toward the steps. "Shall we? Don't forget, they believe me to be human here, Lavi." Seeing the boy's rebellious frown, he smirked. "I mean that they only know of my assumed name. I couldn't very well tell them about myself, could I?"

The Exorcist nodded reluctantly, joining him as he ascended the steps. "I get it, but why are we here at all? Don't tell me you need a check up." The older man snorted quietly, pulling open the door.

"Hardly. We're here to visit someone, Lovely." He waved the boy forward with a smile, joining him inside the hospital's smallish waiting area. Closing the door behind them, he turned to the nurse's station, inclining his head at the gleeful Sarah.

"Miss Porter. I trust that all is well?" Her happy nod was only slightly affected by her curious glance at the man's companion, her eyes moving between them as she rose to her feet.

"Oh, we're wonderful.. But I didn't expect you back so soon! Were you here to see Michaela, or does your friend need something?" Her careful phrasing was not lost on the elder of the two, making him wonder exactly how he should reply.

"Actually, we're both here to see her.. Oh, how rude of me, I haven't introduced you. Lavi, this is Sarah Porter, a nurse here. Miss Porter, this is Lavi, a recent aquaintance of mine.. We're on our way for an outing, so I brought him along with me before we go. Will that be all right?"

She beamed at the pair brightly, nodding. "It's perfectly fine! Would you like to go back now? It's almost time for my rounds again." She gestured to the hallway, stepping quickly from behind the desk to lead the way. "Bethany didn't see fit to continue on here, so there's only the relief nurse in.. You can stay as long as you like, I'll come back by when I finish the walkthrough."

Tyki nodded slowly, stifling a laugh at the Exorcist's persistant tug at his sleeve. "That should be agreeable.. Has she been fed?" Sarah shook her head, pushing open the door with a smile.

"Not just yet, it's been busy today.. Would you like to do it? She seemed to enjoy the attention.." Her wheedling tone brought a faint smile to the man's face as he nodded, following her inside before turning to his anxious companion.

"Are you in any great rush, Lavi..? It wouldn't take long, as eager as she was the last time.." The boy shook his head in confusion, taking in the room with growing understanding.

"No.. It's fine. Anything you want, Tyki."

Smiling, Sarah made her way to the nursery door, calling back to the amused couple as she went. "I'll bring her out, just give me a few minutes to get her situated!" That said, she allowed the door to swing silently closed behind her, leaving the two alone in the room.

Scowling at the older man, Lavi snorted. "You could have just told me, you know.. But I don't understand exactly what we're here for. Is this where you went, before?" He shook his head at the man's affirmative, setting his bag into a chair. "You really are an incredibly strange person, Tyki.." The former Noah smirked faintly, setting his coat atop the other's pack.

"I never claimed otherwise, Lovely.. Ah, here we are." He nodded at the approaching footsteps, motioning toward the seats along the wall. "Let me take care of the matter at hand, and I'll explain a little more clearly after Miss Porter goes for her walk."

Biting his lip, Lavi sighed, seating himself to wait as the nurse reappeared, her arms wrapped firmly around a squirming yellow blanket.

Blinking at the tiny figure in the woman's arms, he turned to his companion. "Is that her..? I mean, she's the baby you found?" His eye widened at the man's slow nod, his expression incredulous as the brunette sank into a nearby chair. Motioning for the other to join him, he lifted his arms to accept the proferred bundle, carefully positioning the child's head into the bend of one elbow.

Sarah turned to leave, waving faintly. "Well, I'm off.. Call the nurse if you need anything else, and I'll be back in a bit." Reaching into her pocket, she handed a filled bottle to the Exorcist, nodding a quick farewell. "It's just warm enough, so take your time.. Have fun!" She left silently, wondering at the odd relation between the two. 'I must have misheard him, it almost sounded as if he called him- Well, his name was Lavi, so of course it was just my ears tricking me..'

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Smiling faintly, Tyki nudged the blanket away from the child's face, revealing her bright hair and owlishly blinking eyes. "Hello again, Little One.. Are things better without the smelly old lady bothering you?" A soft noise of contentment spoke volumes, her hands waving happily at the familiar voice. He laughed quietly, offering a finger for examination. "I've brought someone to see you, if you feel like a bit more company?" Glancing at the stunned redhead, he smirked.

"Would you like to hold her, Lovely? She doesn't really bite all that hard.." As if to dispute his statement, she latched onto his fingers with a delighted squeal, her abrupt movements startling the redhead out of his disbelief.

"Says you.. But at least she doesn't have any teeth. How old do they think she is?" He bent closer, studying the child's size and features. "A week or so? I've never really been around a baby this small.."

Tyki nodded, smiling at the girl's curious noises. "She was still wet when I found her, perhaps a few hours old but no more.. They say that the orphanage can't take her in, so she's still here." Humming at the Exorcist's fascinated examination, he sighed. "I must say, she looks much better clean.. Would you like to introduce yourself, Lavi? I'll most likely return until someone else takes her, so you should at least be aquainted if you wish to accompany me.."

The redhead nodded wordlessly, bending closer. "Hello there, Miki... I'm Lavi. How are you?" He glanced upward at the man's confused hum. "Her name's Michaela, right? A little nickname never hurt anyone.."

Snorting quietly, the older man shook his head. "Of course not, Lovely.. I merely wondered if you were planning on holding Miki yourself, since newborns generally see best at about six inches."

Scowling at his amusement, Lavi sat back in his seat. "Well, Tyrone, I guess I better, just to be sure that she knows which idiot I am." Passing the silently watching child to him, Tyki lifted an eyebrow.

"Indeed. You're the loud one with the red hair.. I'm the quiet one that removes the organs of people who call him Tyrone."

The redhead laughed, accepting the slight weight of the child. Shifting her carefully, he pushed down his sudden anxiety at just how small she really was. "Is.. Was she this little, when you found her..? The youngest one I knew was probably twice her size." His voice must have betrayed his nervousness, making the older man slide further toward him with a slow nod.

"She's grown a bit, but they think it may be some time before she's properly caught up with others her age.. She may very well have been birthed early. But other than that, she seems fairly well off to me, not that I'm overly familiar with babies myself." He urged the Exorcist's arm slightly higher, adjusting the placement of her head. "Like this.. And calm down, Lavi. I doubt there's much harm you could do by simply looking at her."

She murmured as if in agreement, blinking up at the boy solemnly. Leaning close, he smiled brightly, taking a breath to repeat his earlier greeting. Before the words could form, a stray piece of hair brushed her cheek, and she squealed eagerly as she batted the tickling strand with cross-eyed enthusiasm. Blinking in surprise, he allowed her to close her fingers around it, wincing at the continued flailing as she attempted to locate her mouth.

Gently disentangling the Exorcist's hair, Tyki laughed. "She tends to do that rather often.. But then again, I seem to have the same habit, at least as far as you're concerned. She may be hungry, would you like me to take her?"

Lavi shook his head faintly, biting his lip. "No, I'll do it.. You don't mind or anything, do you? I mean, you're-" He frowned at his tone, clearing his throat. "Its not hard, right? She knows what to do once she has her bottle.." He fumbled for the container absently, noting that the glass still felt warm to the touch. "I just have to hold it so she doesn't swallow air, and not let her have too much at once..?"

The brunette hummed in agreement, wondering why the boy's slight worry was so distracting. "She'll most likely stop when she's had enough, Lovely.. She sleeps when she's full." Watching the redhead nudge the childs mouth with the bottle, he was struck by the utter domesticity of the scene, shaking his head at the feeling of exclusion.

Looking up, the Exorcist frowned at his silence, thinking that he'd overstepped his bounds unwittingly. "Are you sure its all right..? You don't look very happy about it.." Feeling her squirm abruptly, he glanced down, alarmed by the mewl of discontent. "What am I doing wrong..? Does she always do that?" He moved the bottle away from her waving hands, unnerved by the answering half-cry. He turned to the older man quickly, his eye wide with mounting panic. "D'you think its because she doesn't know me? I should have let you-"

Tyki shook his head, catching one arm carefully. "She may be overexcited, Lavi. I sincerely doubt that she's old enough to simply hate you on sight.." Tucking the blanket around her arm, he gently took hold of the other, laughing in surprise as she clenched her fingers around his thumb with a growling whine. "Or she may simply be greedy. Try again, Lovely." He stroked his fingers across the back of her grasping hand, sighing in relief as she settled herself closer against the Exorcist's chest.

Nodding, Lavi offered her the bottle a second time, smiling as she latched on with a quiet wheeze. Flushing slightly, he laughed. "M'sorry about that, I just thought that I'd done something wrong.." Looking up at the older man, he sighed. "You're really going to keep coming, Tyki? Aren't you afraid you'll get attached..?"

The half-seriousness of his tone made the brunette smile as he shook his head. "I'll visit her as often as I can, but no. I doubt I'll have to worry about growing overly fond of her, since she is rather a good candidate for adoption.. She'll most likely be gone within the month, wouldn't you think?"

Glancing over the child's visible body, the Exorcist hummed. "She looks perfectly healthy and all, but.. I wouldn't have thought that someone could have just left her like that. Was she sick, or anything like that when you found her?"

Tyki shook his head, carefully adjusting the bottom half of her wrappings. "She was awake, and didn't seem unwell, but she has a mark-" He pointed to the bright spot of red on the sole of her foot, smiling when the faint touch made her squirm. "But this was the only imperfection I could see. Miss Porter never mentioned a defect of any kind, so.."

Eyeing the birthmark closely, Lavi frowned. "That's it? Well, that's just stupid.. I had something like that on my back when I was a kid, and it went away on its own when I was only about 12.." Narrowing his eye, he tightened his grip on the now-dozing infant, shaking his head in obvious disgust. "She's better off here, then. If her mother did that to her, she didn't deserve a baby in the first place."

The older man nodded in agreement, rewrapping her feet. "I thought the same thing myself, actually. But now that she's sleeping.." He raised an eyebrow at the redhead's curious look, sliding back into his chair with an expectant hum.

Snickering quietly, Lavi nodded. "Oh, of course. The almighty hater of humanity wants his baby back.. Excuse my coughing, I think there's a frog in my throat." Handing the child to the waiting brunette, he coughed unconvincingly. "There it goes again.."

Positioning the baby's head carefully, Tyki nodded. "Indeed. It must be delayed reaction from earlier.. I'm sure the nurse would bring you some water if you needed it, Lavi." Laughing at the boy's indignant blush, he relaxed, recovering the child's loosely fisted hands with a corner of the blanket. "I never really hated people, Lovely.. It was more that I killed from necessity than malice. I did keep a part of myself in league with humans, but in the end it didn't save them, did it?" He sighed quietly, avoiding the Exorcist's questioning look. "And she isn't mine, unless you believe that saving a life gives me claim to it.."

Blinking in surprise, Lavi shook his head quickly. "I didn't mean it like that, I was only joking, Tyki." Leaning close, he forced the man to meet his gaze. "You aren't responsible for a life you save, either.. So why are you here at all?"

The brunette smiled faintly, shrugging. "I don't really know, Lavi. I do a great many things for no reason." Staring at the Exorcist meaningfully, he shook his head. "You make a valid point, however.. She's no more mine than you are." He turned toward the sound of approaching footsteps, glad for the interruption. "Are you ready to go, Lovely..? I believe Miss Porter has finished her rounds.."

He didn't wait for a reply, rising to his feet as the woman pushed open the door. "We must have bored her, she fell asleep on me again." He smiled, handing the child to the grinning nurse. "But then again, I suppose she should get all the rest she can manage now, yes?" Sarah nodded happily, her gaze skipping from the sleeping babe to the oddly matched couple and back.

"She's doing well, even though she's still a bit small.. Did you enjoy your visit, Mr. Lo- Er, Lavi?" She flushed at her almost-error, sighing in relief when the younger of the two seemed to miss her unwitting slip.

"Oh, yes. She's a cutie." He smiled winningly, passing her the emptied bottle carefully. "I was just telling Tyrone here that he'd better watch out, or she'll have him hooked." Snickering at the man's short growl, he retrieved his pack from the seat, holding the man's coat out innocently. "But I should be careful too, since I'll probably come back when he does.. If I survive the day, that is." Nodding politely, he waited for the brunette to don his coat, waving at the softly snoring bundle. "Bye-bye, Miki.. It was nice meeting you!"

Tyki squelched the urge to throttle the impishly grinning boy with effort, offering a hand to the confused nurse. "As always, a pleasure.. And as he says, we'll most likely be seeing you again soon. Good day, Little One, Miss Porter.." Turning away from the woman's amused face, he scowled at the waiting Exorcist, opening the door quietly. Making his way to the front door, he ignored the quiet snorting from his side, pushing the outer doors open with a sigh.

"Lavi, sometimes I think that you must have been a very clumsy child.. One that often had occasion to fall on its head." Glancing at their surroundings, he noted the lengthening shadows with surprise, reaching into his pocket to check his watch. "Already half-past 6..? My Goodness, no wonder you're delerious, you must be suffering from low blood sugar." He caught sight of a brightly striped canopy near the street's end, closing his watch with a snap. "Would you like to eat something before we go, Lovely? It seems a bit foolish to go home when we've just left."

The redhead blinked at him in surprise, wincing as his stomach grumbled faintly. "Ah.. We should. You should, you haven't had anything either, right..?" He frowned at the man's negative, elbowing him gently in the ribs. "Let's do that then, so you don't die of malnutrition. What did you have in mind?" He followed the brunette's line of sight, nodding. "Looks like a nice place.. Come on, I want to see where we're going before it gets too dark to appreciate your generosity."

Shaking his head at the Exorcist's impatience, Tyki allowed himself to be pulled in the direction of the small cafe, wondering if the day's final destination would meet the boy's obviously high expectations.

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Couldn't you just die?

Well, I guess thats that. Until the next chapter, keep your noses clean P:

Have fun with that, and visit my group's site for more news on upcoming projects and updates..

Well looky here:

2008-11-16T22:55:47Z

Hm, I'm sure everyone has heard of the D.Gray-Man Complete Best CD/DVD.. Lovely music.. Textless OP

and ED sequences..
Well, since it seems that no one has bothered to release them as seperate files, here they are, encoded to

xvid format, each is 18mb, very good quality. Comments are appreciated, as this actually took quite some

time.. The original DVD file was h264/AVC and extremely difficult to edit. All files are original resoloution.
Credit goes to AssHat Productions.

Files included:
[AHP][DGM_COMPLETE_BEST][Anata_Ga_Koko_Ni_Iru_Riyu_Textless_864X480]
[AHP][DGM_COMPLETE_BEST][Antoinette_Blue_Textless_864X480]
[AHP][DGM_COMPLETE_BEST][Brightdown_Textless_848X480]
[AHP][DGM_COMPLETE_BEST][Changin_Textless_864X480]
[AHP][DGM_COMPLETE_BEST][Doubt&Trust_Textless_864X480]
[AHP][DGM_COMPLETE_BEST][Gekidou_Textless_864X480]
[AHP][DGM_COMPLETE_BEST][Innocent_Sorrow_Textless_864X480]
[AHP][DGM_COMPLETE_BEST][Pride_Of_Tomorrow_Textless_848X480]
[AHP][DGM_COMPLETE_BEST][Regret_Textless_864X480]
[AHP][DGM_COMPLETE_BEST][Snow_Kiss_Textless_864X480]
[AHP][DGM_COMPLETE_BEST][Wish_Textless_864X480]
[AHP][DGM_COMPLETE_BEST][Yume_No_Tsudzuki_E_Textless_864X480]

GLEEfullness

Links are at the bottom of the page ^_^

And hooray for yet another new layout!

2008-11-13T18:20:30Z

*SQUEE* I just love it, sailorlight22 made it for me, and then she sent me the rip of the DGM Complete Best DVD.. So much GLEE!

Nightmare Game Chapter 6

2008-10-31T04:48:40Z

HOLY FUKN SHIT, IT'S AN UPDATE.
...Now that that's out of the way..

Nightmare Game

A D.Gray-Man Fanfiction

By SisterWicked

Chapter 6 - Nightwalk

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Lavi woke alone.

The space beside him was cool, telling him that it's previous occupant was long gone. Sighing quietly, he frowned, remembering the night's activities. The dream he'd forgotten remained so, an almost frightening blank in his otherwise flawless memory.

Recalling his embarrassing reaction, he winced. He could barely believe that he'd clung to his companion so tightly, just as he couldn't believe that the man had allowed and even encouraged it. Remembering that was even more humiliating, how he'd begged for anything the other was willing to give, even though he knew he shouldn't. His memory provided him with feelings and images, almost as if it were eager to mock his weakness.

Shivering briefly, he wondered what the older man must think of him, knowing that his desperate pleas for release must have sounded terribly whorish. Even that had not been enough, he'd all but demanded to be taken, urging the man to his limits and beyond..

His skin prickled with remembered heat, and he bit his lip hard enough to bleed as his heart began to pound. Confusion dampened the feeling slightly, but the lingering scent of his captor on the sheets was nearly maddening, making the Exorcist gasp as a bolt of arousal struck him. His breath hitched painfully, startling him into rising. He couldn't be feeling this, not so soon..!

'I want him,' He thought, shaking his head in disgust. 'He spent half the night fucking me, and the first thing I think about is wanting more!'

Ignoring his aching muscles, he stood, pulling his shirt on almost angrily. The soreness only reminded him of it's cause, and again he nearly staggered at the urgent leap of his pulse. Sinking into the man's desk chair, he sighed. Remembering that the other kept a watch in the desk, he searched briefly, pulling it out and flipping open the lid. Seeing that it was close to three o' clock, he shook his head in disbelief. As far back as he could recall, he'd never slept so late, even after being injured on a mission.

But then again, he'd never spent three days fucking a man that he was supposed to hate.

The thought provoked another wave of memories, the hot slickness of a tongue on his skin, the rasp of teeth... Clenching his hands tightly, he struggled to breathe, every nerve afire with a longing ache. Riding out his shivers, he laughed at himself, inspecting the shallow cuts left by his short nails.

"Stupid," He muttered, wiping the slowly oozing wounds on the black fabric of his pants. "Stupid fucking child, whining over a dream!" He slumped back against the chair, closing his eye.

'Not a child.. A whore. A stupid, whining whore that can't even control his own body. Pathetic.'

He shuddered at the thought, his hands clutching the arms of the chair.

'You always get what's coming to you, when you want the wrong thing.. How many dreams were just like this, begging for every inch of a murderer's body while he fucked you like an animal?'

Remembering his nocturnal transgressions, he growled, disgusted by the unwitting lust he'd felt for a complete stranger. The image of the miner he'd met on that long-ago train had been a guilt-laden plaything, fueling his hormones like coals on dry paper. At first, he'd pushed the other's face away, but after several all-too-clearly recalled dreams that left him panting amidst tangled, sticky sheets, he's stopped denying the depth of his blasphemous attraction.

'After imagining those hands, his hands, on you when you touched yourself, there's nothing left to complain about, not when the real thing is so much better.. Even when it hurts, it hurts so damn good.. Why fight, if there's nothing else worth having? And there isn't. There never was.'

Shaken at the utter darkness of his thoughts, he rose from the chair with a choking denial, blinking rapidly at the futile sting of tears. He knew that the reasoning was correct, no matter how hard it was to accept the words in his mind. He'd allowed himself to be consumed by his passion for another man, an enemy that he had sworn to destroy at any cost. The second meeting with that man had been his final humiliation, his stomach twisting with self-hating nausea as the skin he'd secretly craved turned from deep olive to ashen grey..

'And you still wanted that skin, wanted to feel the heat of it against your back.. Even those hateful demon eyes, you moaned like a bitch in heat when you imagined them watching you while you begged..'

Wiping his face with a hand, he strode to the bathroom, turning on the cold water to splash his burning face. Looking up at himself in the mirror, he flinched at his ragged appearance, the faint shading beneath his eye giving silent testament to his lack of rest.

'It doesn't matter what you look like, he calls you Lovely, doesn't he? His lovely little whore, just like a rat that he picked up out of the gutter to play with.. How long will it be fun, before he gets tired of seeing you on your back or on your knees? I wonder if he'll finish you off like he started, with teeth at your throat while you bleed out your stolen life?'

The memory of the man's passion-induced bite and his reaction to it left him staggered with sickness, retching violently into the basin of the sink. Gasping for air, he leaned his head against the cool surface of the counter, shaking his head. "Not a rat.. 'M not like that, he promised.. He won't-"

'Won't what? Grow tired of seeing a pathetic human playing at nursemaid? He might be mad, but he's lived this long without your useless presence. You could die now, and he'd forget you just as quickly as the last whore he bedded. Just a thing to be disposed of, just like the rest of his trash.'

Lavi shuddered, breathing heavily. "He wants me here, he could have killed me! He needs-"

'Why would he kill a perfectly good fuck toy? That's what he needs, a way to work off all that pent-up want. Better keep him satisfied, or he might go find another toy.. Maybe a sweet little thing that he can wrap around those talented fingers.'

Bolting to his feet, the boy gripped the edge of the counter to steady himself. "He wouldn't.. He won't! He said that I'm his, so that makes him mine!" He stiffened at the sound of his own voice, the possessive tone shocking him. Facing his reflection in the mirror, he shook his head. "He said he wanted.. God, I can't give him what he wants! I told him that I can't! Dammit!"

'That's right. He'll get tired of that, and find someone who can.. He might be looking now. The little performance last night was probably enough to get him thinking.'

Taking a deep breath, he shook his head, turning away from the mirror. "He said it was enough to be mine.." He whispered, forcing down his anxiety. "Last night doesn't matter, he let me hold him like that for nothing.. He wanted to be with me, after we were done!" The inner voice laughed tauntingly.

'But he's not yours, is he? You can't give him anything more than an easy lay.. You're just a body to warm the bed. But why fret over it? Forget how useless this you is, and let the rest have a turn.'

He walked to the aforementioned bed, jerking the sheets and blanket straight as he struggled to ignore the presence of a single dark hair upon the nearest pillow, the coiled strand drawing his eyes again and again before he finally completed his task. "This me isn't useless, he said he wants to keep me! He doesn't even know about the other ones.." Sinking down to sit on the bed's edge, he rubbed at a singularly tense area just below his spine. "If I acted like some of them, he really would want me to leave! The last one-"

'Had whatever he wanted, because he wasn't afraid to take it. You could stand to be more like that, taking and having for yourself instead of infantile clinging.'

Clenching his fists, he nodded. "I know he was stronger! But I can't be like that anymore, that life is over!" Blinking in surprise at himself, he shook his head. "That person doesn't exist.. Even if I remember it, that can't bring back someone that's gone!" The voice was softer, the tone less harsh.

'You never decided that.. The old man took that person away, but you could bring him back..'

He bit his lip in thought, remembering how simple things had seemed before he became Lavi. "I can't." He finally whispered, sighing tiredly. "The change is absolute, I can't be that person anymore." The reply was still soft, far removed from the spiteful words of before.

'Maybe not.. But there's still a bit left behind, isn't there? You could open yourself like the old man does when he needs one of the Other's memories, and let some of him come through..'

Stiffening, he shook his head. "I can't do that by myself, I might break what's left of this me's persona.. I wouldn't have anyone to wake me back up, if I tried it alone."

'Don't go too deep. He'll be back, and you know you'll sense him near you.. That would wake you up.'

Tucking his bare feet beneath him, he slumped. "I don't get that, either.. I know what I said, but shouldn't I be afraid, even a little? He gets so angry, but I still.." He tapered off, closing his eye. "I've got to work harder, so he won't be like that anymore! He's not the person he was, he's been kind to me.."

'Then make him yours. He'll be happy, and you can keep him just the way you wanted to.. You only need to be a little stronger, and there's a stronger self to use.. Isn't he worth it?'

"Yes! But that won't change anything, I still can't.. I won't feel anything back!" He shook his head in frustration, leaning back against the headboard. "He wouldn't be happy like that, he could have pointless sex with anyone he wanted!"

'But he said that he wants you. You can't expect him to change if you won't change for him.. And you could. Are you that selfish?'

He shivered at the faint thrill brought on by the thought, forcing it away in favor of more pressing matters. "He doesn't know anything! If I did try to change, he wouldn't even be able to tell.." He sat up quickly, his eye wide. "He really wouldn't.. I could try, a little.. Maybe it won't take very much, just to be more..confident."

He moved to the edge of the bed, taking a deep breath in readiness. Forcing himself to relax, he allowed his thoughts to drift back to his time before the Order, looking past the memories themselves in favor of more personal things, the sense of who he'd been. It was surprisingly easy, and he wondered if the hallucinated battle with the other man's sister had damaged more than just the current persona he'd adopted. Ignoring the feeling of wrongness at his course of action, he closed his eye, examining the things that separated this him from the other.

'See? Strength, determination.. It was the drive to achieve a goal that was different. As you are, you would ask before you take.. Would that really be of any use, now?'

And he did see. The person he'd been most recently would never have felt pity so easily, or cared that his captor was less to blame than it seemed. That person would only have seen that this was the one he'd wished for, and used the chance he'd been given to have the thing he desired.

It was unsettling, to think that he'd been so different in so short a time, but even the less appealing parts of that person had been an advantage. People had never been willing to openly ridicule him as they did now, not when it was clear that he wouldn't react well. Imagining the other's reaction to Kanda or Komui's...unique personalities was almost humorous, but he shook off the urge to laugh as he concentrated on just how he could change his nature with subtle adjusting.

Pushing tentatively at the intangible wall between then and now, he shivered at the sensation it produced, almost like a cold draft in his head. There was resistance, but nothing that felt impenetrable, not like it had always seemed before. Setting the thought aside for later consideration, he focussed on the division, drawing the things he sought closer to the surface of himself.

'Just.. a little more..'

There.

He knew he'd found it, there was nothing Lavi about the feeling of these memories, not with the sharply defined edges of self-righteousness and willpower. Allowing the sense of that other person to come forward, he impressed them into the less-firm definition of this person, replacing wonder and hope and wish with the other's know and will and have.

At first, there was no change, and he growled in frustration. Then, it was almost as if something tore in the back of his head, the feeling of pressure and pain and fear jumbling together in a single instant of agony that pitched him headlong to the floor. He thought he must have screamed, but there was no sound save the panicked rush of blood in his ears, the accompanying heartbeat erratic enough to be frightening as he clutched at himself unconsciously.

Gasping for breath, he laughed at the receding terror despite his violent trembling. "Fuck. Maybe not the best plan.." He reached blindly for the edge of the bed, pulling himself up to sit as he shook off his rattled nerves. Breathing deeply, he noticed immediately that his uncertainty had dissipated, though the thinly-veiled urge to have more of his captor's.. attentions.. remained.

"Well, at least I'm not so damned afraid of it anymore." He muttered, blinking away the remnants of his pained tears. "I should have told him not to take off like that before I went to sleep, but he should have known that I wouldn't like being stuck here like this.." Frowning at the room's emptiness, he leaned back on his elbows, closing his eye with a snort. "Maybe he'll be here soon, it's not like he has anything else to do.. I can think of a few things that need doing, though."

Again, his mind provided him with images and sensations of their previous activities, but rather than disgusted arousal he felt heat. Half-expecting the inner voice to comment, he laughed at his rising pulse as he lay back on the soft blanket. Trailing a finger along his chest in tandem with the other's remembered touch, he sighed. "Mm. Definately something that needs done.. For once I'm glad my memory's so good."

Imagining his teacher's horrified expression at this particular use of his finely-honed memory, he snickered. "Oh well. He did say I needed better concentration.." Feeling the slight displacement of air nearby, he sat up, turning toward the faint step beyond the room's closed door. "Finally.." He muttered, stretching absently. "Maybe he won't mind having a little talk about what he's gotten himself into.."

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Tyki materialized at the entrance to his room, deciding that it may be best to avoid startling the boy he could sense was within. There was an unfamiliar edge to his presence, lending a feeling of unease to the man's already unsettled thoughts. 'Perhaps he's annoyed at being left for so long.' He mused, reaching for the doorknob. Turning it, he pushed the door open slowly, his eyes scanning the room in search of the younger boy as he stepped inside.

Seeing him seated on the edge of the bed, he relaxed at his seeming calm, shrugging off his heavy coat. Hanging it carelessly on the hook beside the door, he toed his shoes off with a contented sigh. "Horrible things.." He muttered, turning to address his companion. Finding himself nearly face-to-face with the Exorcist, he jumped in surprise. "Lavi! Gods, now I see why you dislike that so.. Lavi? What's wrong?"

The redhead began to reply, his mouth closing abruptly as he sniffed curiously in the older man's direction. Leaning closer, he inhaled deeply, raising his head to glare at the surprised man. "Where did you go?" He asked, his soft question belying the tense set of his shoulders. Blinking at his intense stare, the former Noah cleared his throat.

"The post office, to send the letters I finished last night. You were still sleeping, so I thought it best to-" Lavi snorted, cutting him off.

"To find another way to entertain yourself? If you were that desperate, you could have woke me up and saved yourself the trouble of finding a whore." He waved a hand at the man's incredulous expression, ignoring his alarmed hum. "That's what I'm here for, isn't it? You could have at least picked one that didn't reek of cheap perfume, I hear that they usually do that to keep you from smelling the diseases they carry."

Laughing mirthlessly, he shook his head. "I hope you didn't wear yourself out, because I was just thinking about how hungry I am."

Tyki raised an eyebrow in confusion, something about the boy's tightly-controlled voice making him wonder at the meaning of his statement. "Lovely, I can assure you that whatever you're imagining is wrong. The perfume is from a nurse I met at the hospital, a particularly unsavory woman, actually. I wouldn't have lain with her if the very fate of the world depended on it."

Before he could explain further, he found himself pressed firmly against the door, a shaking redhead holding his wide eyed gaze as he pulled his shirt free of his pants. Working the buttons loose from their holes, the boy shoved the garment roughly over his shoulders, dropping it to the floor as he took hold of the older man's waistband.

"So, you let her do what you wouldn't let me finish? That's just great. Maybe I should be happy that you spared me the indignity?" He yanked the button free, batting at the man's hand as he strove to ward him off. Seeing a brief flash of color, he caught the other's wrist, turning the palm upward. Glaring fiercely at the clear red outline of a mouth, he all but hissed in fury. "God, you really do have them eating out of your hand, don't you?" Tugging the hand forward, he wiped the offending smear away with the hem of his shirt, ignoring the other's sharp inhale. "At least I won't leave anything like that on you."

Lifting the man's hand to his face, he pressed his lips to the palm, licking briefly at his skin before drawing a wet trail up the length of his middle finger with his tongue. Nipping sharply at the tip, he raised his head to stare at the older man's astonished face. "See? Not a trace. Besides that, I hope you cleaned yourself off, I'd hate to end up with some stranger's spit in my mouth."

Tyki shook his head quickly, pulling his hand away. "I didn't do anything like that with her, Lovely. There were things that needed to be said, and she refused to be silent." Taking in the boy's openly skeptical look, he sighed. "Is my word no longer good, Lavi? I swear to you, I did nothing but speak to her, it was urgent that she be still, so I covered her mouth to avoid unwanted attentions."

The boy leveled a blank stare at him, the expression softening slightly at the man's pained wince. "Fair enough," He said, nodding. "But since I'm already halfway there, I might as well finish what I started." Ignoring the older man's quick gasp, he sank to his knees, wrapping his arms around his hips as he pressed his mouth to the skin just above his navel. Tightening his grip, he held the man still with a hand against his back, pulling him closer as he closed his eye.

Hearing the other's low moan, he hummed quietly in agreement. Freeing one hand, he tugged carefully at the man's zipper, sliding it down as he licked teasing lines over his dark skin. Slipping his fingers beneath the loosened material, he pulled firmly at both pants and undergarments, leaning away to allow the other room to step out of them without halting his course across the plane of his stomach.

Setting the discarded clothing aside, he resumed his hold on the older man's waist, moving his head slightly to continue his explorations. Following the curve of his abdomen, he sighed against the sparsely haired skin, lowering his hands to stroke the sides of his hips. "Please don't stop me this time.." He murmured, avoiding the stare he could feel the older man directing at his bent head. "I need to know that I can do this, Tyki."

Without waiting for a reply, he cupped his palm lightly over the man's hardened skin, supporting it's weight firmly as he stroked his tongue across the tip. Feeling the answering shake of his muscles, the Exorcist whined softly in response, repeating the action as his fingers shifted to allow more room for his eager movements. The sensation of hands digging carefully into his hair urged him on, his mouth opening as he sucked gently on the heated flesh.

Tyki shuddered slightly, fighting the need to pull the boy's head closer with extreme force of will. Closing his eyes, he leaned heavily against the door, an odd pressure reminding him of the twice-damned hat he'd neglected to remove. Stifling a snort at the utterly ridiculous image he must present, he shook his head in amused exasperation.

The near-silent noise prompted the redhead to pull away, his eye narrowing dangerously as he looked up. "What's so damned funny?" He asked, frowning at the other's smirk. "If it's wrong, say something! Don't just-"

Tyki shook his head, composing his features into some semblance of seriousness. "I'm not laughing at you, Lovely.. I was merely thinking that I'm overdressed for the occasion." He indicated his point with an upward glance, shrugging at the boy's muffled snicker. "Believe me, there's nothing funny about what you're doing."

Lavi raised an eyebrow, shaking his head. "Good. But there must be a problem.. If you're able to think about your hat, I must be doing something wrong." He leaned in, resuming his efforts with more enthusiasm, humming contentedly at the man's surprised moan. Feeling the other's fingers tighten against his scalp, he slid his free hand down from it's place, stroking his palm over the lean muscles of the older man's backside to pull him closer.

Tyki gasped approvingly at his touch, cradling the back of his head gently as he increased his pace. The sensation of the boy's mouth was unbelievably intense, the slick warmth of his tongue drawing a ragged sound from the man's throat as he shivered. The noise seemed to fuel the redhead's determination, his grip tightening as he urged the older man on with a muffled whine. Struggling to hold himself still, Tyki panted harshly in anticipation.

"Please don't stop, it feels.. Oh God, Lovely, please!" He arched away from the door, his voice failing him as he ground an urgent warning that the boy pointedly ignored. Feeling his control slip, he pulled his hands free of the Exorcist's hair, catching his shoulders as he bucked desperately forward. Lavi whimpered pleadingly, his movements unfaltering as he held the other's hips tightly in his shaking hands.

Tyki moaned in reply, the sound catching in his throat as the boy pressed closer, squeezing his hips in mute encouragement. The slight reassurance was his undoing, his back arching sharply as he cried out the Exorcist's name in a voice made rough by release. Lavi hummed softly, ignoring the slightly bitter taste as he pulled away, wiping his mouth with the back of one hand. Breathing heavily, he sat at the man's feet, still avoiding his dazed look until the other lowered himself carefully to the floor beside him.

Raising an unsteady hand, Tyki caught the boy's face, turning his head to meet his gaze. His face was lightly tinged with embarrassment, but his expression remained faintly challenging, as if he expected the man to chide him for his actions. Sighing quietly, the older man shook his head, using his hold to pull the surprised redhead in for a kiss. Leaning away for air, he laughed.

"Gods, Lavi.. Are you really so jealous? Your possessiveness is unwarranted, I hardly think I need another lover, if you're as eager as that.." The boy frowned back at him, his face still colored with ire.

"You said you weren't going to share me, so I'm not going to share you! You said you were mine, didn't you?" He demanded, scowling at the other's surprised look. "What? I can be just as selfish as you, dammit!"

Shaking off the man's hold, he averted his face. "Don't just leave like that anymore. Wake me up, or leave a note, something! You're just gone, and I don't even have any way of knowing if you'll be back!" Tyki blinked at him in astonishment, then frowned.

"You think that I would leave you here, Lovely? Just go, and abandon you here to die? Gods, do you really think that little of me?" He took hold of the Exorcist's arm, pulling him around sharply. "Look at me! Do you honestly believe that, Lavi? Even at my worst, I wouldn't have stooped to such a thing! I only left you asleep because you needed it, I didn't think it would upset you."

The boy flinched at his tone, but glared back defiantly. "You thought I wouldn't care if you were gone? That says a lot about your opinion of me, too!" Jerking his arm free, he stood, ignoring the tingle of returning circulation as he glowered down at the stunned man. "I didn't stay here for a good lay, Tyki! I can't give you what you asked me for, but I can at least give a fuck about what happens to you!"

Clenching his hands tightly, he shook his head. "You don't even understand that! After all the talk about family and love, you can't even grasp the idea of someone being worried about you when you're off doing God knows what! I was like that too, but the people at the Order changed me.. I can't care about them the way they cared about me, but after everything was finished, I wanted to! They said that was enough, but it's not! Nobody should be left like that, outside of everything that matters! Even if I didn't want to help you, I owe it to them to try!"

Glancing around the room, he leveled a hard look at the brunette, sighing in frustration. "I've spent a lot of time here by myself, and I don't know how you can stand it, Tyki. There's nothing, no people outside, no noise, nothing! Just you and whatever it is that you think about when you're alone! It's no wonder that you're going crazy, that thing in your head is all that's here! You can't live like that, nobody can! Stop using this place to torture yourself!"

Raking a hand through his hair, he sank down in front of the older man, willing him to understand. "I don't think that you'd go off and leave me here, Tyki. I wouldn't have stayed if I thought that, not for anybody's sake." Looking away, he ignored the man's unclothed state, refusing to be distracted by the lingering traces of his desperate arousal. "When you leave like that, I wonder if you're okay. You might be damn near indestructible, but you aren't immortal, Noah or not! I don't have to be infatuated with you to worry, I can do that for almost anyone!"

Wincing inwardly at the thought of his former companions, he shook his head. "I told you that I don't think of you like that anymore, I look at it the same way that I'd worry about someone who never heard of the Earl! People die, Tyki. Some people just take a little more to do the job."

Facing the other squarely, he steeled himself against the man's wide eyed expression. "You don't have to tell me where you're going, just.. Give me a chance to say goodbye, in case you don't come back."

The memory of his own departure made him shudder, his chest tight with guilt as he thought of all the people he'd neglected to bid farewell. The voice that had mocked him for his uselessness returned full force to remind him of his unthinking cruelty, sending a wave of cold down his spine.

As if he could read the boy's thoughts, Tyki leaned in, his face intent with sudden comprehension. "That's what you did, isn't it? You thought you'd be safe, so you left without.. Oh, God." He caught the redhead's arm again, pulling him forward despite his faint struggles. "I didn't know, Lovely.. Why are you doing this? It doesn't make sense for you to stay here, not when everything you lost was directly because of me! Why would you want to be here?"

Lavi pulled back against his hold, shaking his head. "I don't know! I want to help you, but I don't know how I can! The only thing I do know is that you need me here, even if it's just to keep from being stuck in this place alone!" Seeing the older man's surprise, he pulled harder, shivering at the feeling of his fingers sliding across the back of his hand. "I want to know some things too, Tyki. How can you sit there and look at me, knowing what I did? You should hate me more than anything in the Goddamned world, because you hurt when you lost your family! You brought me here, and even though that took away my 'family', I can't feel the way you did!"

He laughed, mocking himself. "We weren't even that close anymore.. They know that I don't feel like they're my family, not really. After the war was over, I couldn't even say that I was happy! Nobody ever said anything about that, but I could see it in their eyes when they looked at me, that they were finally starting to get tired of caring about someone that couldn't return their feelings.." Avoiding the other's questioning look, he sighed. "Honestly, I think that did hurt, a little. It sure as Hell wasn't just nothing anymore, but it isn't even close to what happened to you, Tyki." Facing him abruptly, he winced at the man's obvious sympathy. "You should hurt me, because I deserve it a lot more than you do! Every time you touch me should be like it was before, except that you shouldn't be worried about me liking it! You didn't take anything important from me, there was no one else that would have wanted it!"

The older man stared at him in open disbelief, the expression almost comical if not for it's cause. "You don't value yourself at all, Lavi? No one should have to want you for you to be concerned of your own well-being!" The boy glared at him in sudden anger, jerking away to avoid his attempts at recapturing his wrist.

"What would you know about it? You don't care about yourself either! All you do is sit here in this awful place and rot." He rose to his feet, shaking with inexplicable fury. "You take better care of me than you do yourself! How do you ever expect to be happy if you don't try?" The former Noah shook his head, rising to stand in front of him.

"Maybe that's why you're here, Lavi. You can remind me to take better care of myself, if I forget." Stepping closer, he noticed the other's abrupt stillness, a subtle shift of weight as if he meant to retreat. "Besides my personal disregard, is something wrong? You're looking at me like I might eat you, Lovely." He took in the tense set of the redhead's features, frowning at the deep coloring around the wound on his throat. "Does it hurt? You should be careful, I've heard that a bite can be worse than anything else.." Lifting a hand to the boy's collar, he pushed it back gently, leaning in to inspect the mark with a wince. Hearing the Exorcist's indrawn breath, he turned to look at him in surprise. "Did I..Lavi? Is it as bad as all that?" The look on his face was unmistakably fearful, but he shook his head.

"It doesn't really hurt, you just.." He faltered, closing his eye with a shudder. "Don't touch me." He managed, moving away from the other's light hold. "I need to be somewhere else, I don't want to look at you right now." He turned, forcing down the quick stab of arousal at the older man's proximity.

Tyki allowed him to go, watching his back curiously as he crossed the room with decidedly halting steps. The slight tremor of his hand was apparent as he reached for the doorknob, prompting the man to follow him despite his obvious aversion. "Wait. Are you unwell, Lavi? You're shaking, and you look feverish." He laid his palm against the Exorcist's cheek, noting his heightened color. "You're warm, but not overly so.." Humming in confusion, he looked again at the shallow wound on the boy's neck, jumping at the feeling of the redhead's hand on his waist. Glancing up, he blinked at the haze of lust in his widened eye. "Lovely..?"

The Exorcist shook his head mutely, his hold tightening as he leaned in, pulling the man forward as he rose to his toes to press their mouths together roughly. Feeling him stiffen in surprise, he lifted his free hand to the older man's neck, his fingers twining into his hair to hold him steady as he licked at his lower lip.

Growling at his slight resistance, he pulled back with a frown. "You should have let me leave, Tyki. I told you, I need to be away from you for a while." Seeing the man's dawning comprehension, he nodded. "Good, I don't have to explain. Now if you'll excuse me, I think it would probably be a good idea to leave the room with the naked man in it." Releasing his grip, he stepped back, scowling as the other moved to match him. "I'm not kidding around, Tyki! I'm sorry that I yelled at you, but not sorry enough to sit here and go crazy watching you prance around naked!"

Tyki shook his head in amused exasperation, backing the spluttering boy to the wall. "Lovely, I cannot recall a single instance of prancing in my entire life. Besides that, why would you avoid me, if you know that I would be more than willing to alleviate your.. suffering?" Taking note of the Exorcist's diminishing ire, he smiled, leaning in to invade his personal space.

"It is a kiss that you want, Lavi? By all means, help yourself." He bent closer, pausing only inches from the other's upturned face. "Go on, I won't stop you.. I rather like it when you take the initiative." Raising an eyebrow at the boy's shaky reluctance, he tugged lightly at the front of his shirt, urging him forward. "Do I need to ask? Kiss me, Lovely.. Please?"

The redhead nodded jerkily, leaning in with a quiet whine. He caught the man's lips hesitantly, his eye shut tight as he lifted an unsteady hand to rest along one bare hip. His breath hitched painfully at the other's low hum of approval, the sensation of teeth against his lip prompting him to deepen the kiss with a moan. He followed the man's retreating tongue eagerly, his fingers digging into his skin as the brunette's hand moved down to cup him through the material of his pants.

Bucking into the touch, he pulled back with a strangled cry, his legs shaking with rising desperation. The man hissed softly in agreement, wrapping an arm around his waist as he continued his slow strokes.

"Do you want me to stop? I'll only ask you once, Lavi, so don't lie to me." He smiled at the boy's ragged negative, toying idly with the buttons of his shirt. "What do you want me to do, Lovely? It's too soon for me to take you, but I certainly wouldn't mind returning your incredibly generous welcome.." The Exorcist nodded rapidly, jerking his shirt free of his pants and pulling it over his head without bothering to unbutton it.

Staring expectantly up at the surprised man, he frowned at his soft laugh. "Well? Are you going to stand there snickering at me, or are you going to move your hand so I can take these off?" He indicated his pants with a nod. "You really pick the worst times to be a fucking tease, Tyki. Maybe I should start doing that to you, and see how you like it."

The older man blinked at the earnest venom in his tone, his eyes narrowing slightly. "I don't think you can do that, Lavi. Teasing means to tempt without the intention of fulfillment, and you seem very keen on that." Taking hold of the boy's waistband, he tugged at the button, working it free as he slipped a hand inside the borrowed garment. Pushing the zipper out of his way, he resumed his steady strokes directly against the redhead's hardened skin. "Look at you.. How could you tease me, when every inch of you is begging for me? You don't have the slightest idea of what real teasing is, Lovely."

Biting back a moan, the boy met his gaze evenly, the voice in his head raging at the other's casual dismissal of his willpower. Smiling brittly, he ran a hand up the man's side, pressing firmly against his back. "Maybe I do want it.. But it's not only me, is it? I might not be able to tease you like that, but I can sure as hell tempt you, can't I?" He arched away from the wall, leaning flush against the other's body.

"You're supposed to be the big, scary sexual predator, but I could make you do me any time I wanted it. You said it yourself, you love to have me willing." Closing his eye, he hummed at the older man's momentary pause. "I don't know why you want it so much, when I know you've had better.. But that doesn't matter. Maybe it's because I told you that you can have it anytime you want it?" He traced down the man's spine with a finger, smiling at his quiet gasp as he drew meaningless designs on his skin. "You'd rather do that than lick me, wouldn't you? I'll bet you're thinking about it now, wondering if your carpet would hurt my knees if you fucked me right here on the floor."

He laughed at the brunette's stunned expression, shaking his head. "It wouldn't. I remember what it felt like under my back, and I can promise you that nothing we do on your carpet would be painful."

Seeing the man's eyes widen, his smile became almost mocking. Pulling the other's hand out of his pants, he took hold of his naked backside, yanking him forward. Using the wall to brace himself, he ground his hips into the older man's, moaning at the friction between them. "Mm.. This could be good, too. If you're worried about the floor, we could always try the wall.. You were going to do it like that the first time, weren't you?" He moved one hand to his waist, shoving impatiently at his pants. Growling in annoyance, he kicked them off, resuming his grip on the man's hip.

Lifting his head, he watched the former Noah's face as he repeated his deliberate movements. "You know, now that I really look at you, I should probably be thankful.. If I was going to have someone be my first, it's better that it wasn't an ugly person."

The older man winced at his flippant reference to his lost virginity, shaking his head rapidly. "No! That isn't something to be grateful for, you should have had a person of your own choosing.." He faltered, leaning down to meet the Exorcist's gaze. "I would undo it, if I could! I wish I had never laid eyes or hands on you, Lavi. No amount of willingness or pleasure can ever make it right."

Snorting in amusement, the redhead closed his eye. "God, you act like I'm completely innocent, Tyki.. You don't have any idea what I was like, before you brought me here." He glared fiercely up at the older man, his hands still firm against his skin. "The first time I met you, I thought to myself, 'I bet he would be so fucking hot without those damned glasses.' That's why I couldn't believe that you were the same person, because you took them off the next time we saw you like that, and you really were. It made me sick that I thought about you like that, and you were a Goddamned Noah the whole time! I didn't get anything I didn't deserve, for being stupid enough to want you!"

Tyki stared at him in disbelief, taking hold of his shoulders. "You didn't know that! Even when we fought, you didn't recognize me. You only wanted the person you believed me to be, Lovely." He leaned back, placing a hand against the wall to push himself away. "Is that why you really stayed, Lavi? Not just because of Rhode, but because you think that you deserve this?"

The Exorcist shook his head, his hold tightening. "It was after that, too! I knew what you were, and I still.. Damn it, you haven't done anything that I wouldn't have let you do, if you'd asked!" Clenching his jaw, he spoke through gritted teeth. "You could have brought me here without knocking me out, idiot! It might have taken longer, but I would have done it! The only one who hated anybody was you!" Closing his eye, he struggled to control his rage, the man's sharp exhale reminding him of his harsh grip. Forcing back his anger, he sighed.

"None of that matters anymore. What matters now is that we're both completely naked, and I still want you enough to make me sick." Loosening his hold, he looked calmly up at the shaken man. "Nobody needs to be hurting or begging, Tyki.. You can have me right now, if you want me." The former Noah shivered at his sudden quiet, his eyes wide with obvious anxiety.

"I..Lovely, I'll hurt you! You can't just keep doing this, it's.." The boy cut him off with a kiss, his hands now gentle on his back as he waited for a response. Feeling the man's muscles tense under his fingers, he urged him closer, humming contentedly as the other's lips parted invitingly. Accepting his silent offer, the redhead stroked his tongue over the older man's own, whimpering shortly when he returned the gesture eagerly.

Breaking away for air, he gasped as the man turned his attentions to his throat, his teeth pressing lightly against the skin at the sound. Shifting to allow him more room, he arched pleadingly away from the wall. "You said I should have.. had a choice, didn't you? Then let me choose!" He pressed urgently against the other's front, wondering why his overwhelming anger had faded so completely. 'Maybe I really shouldn't have tampered..' He thought, unnerved by the idea. 'It feels like I did it right.. But.. I want to make him do this.. Whether he wants it or not!'

Feeling the older man pause, he shook his head mutely, pressing lightly against the back of his head. He stroked his other hand along one naked thigh, curling his fingers around the curve of his hip. "Please," He whispered, not bothering to hide the tremor in his voice. "Don't make me beg, if you want it too.. I don't care if it hurts a little, it always gets better.." He urged the man's head up for a kiss, his hand tangled in the thick mass of his hair.

"I really wouldn't have fought you, Tyki.. After all those dreams I had.. God, you wouldn't believe how bad I wanted you, even the way you used to be." He shuddered at the feeling of a hand on his back, closing his eye with a breathless laugh. "I like this you better though.. You really are the hottest man I've ever seen." Hearing the other's surprised hum, he smiled, pressing closer. "I always heard that the devil is beautiful, but this is ridiculous."

Tyki blinked at him incredulously for all of a minute, stunned by the sudden praise. "Lovely, I- You don't have to.." Lavi cut him off with a nod, meeting his confused gaze.

"I know. I don't have to say anything, but there's no way that you don't know. Did you think it was just the Noah, making people want you?" Snorting at the man's continued shock, he stepped back, glancing brazenly over his unclothed body. "Jesus, Tyki.. I could get myself off just looking at you.. You're just.. God." Looking back at the other's wide eyes, he sighed. "Never mind, Tyki. It's nothing you haven't heard before.. If you really don't want me, that's fine, but.." Clenching his hands, he looked away, ignoring the urge to demand more from the obviously reluctant brunette. "Don't stop me, when I try to leave. It's not your problem, so don't worry about it."

Tyki shook his head, moving forward to catch the boy's shoulders tightly. "You don't tell a man he's beautiful and then expect him to just let you walk away, Lovely.. And isn't it my problem? You say that I made you this way, so I should make it better, no?" He didn't wait for the other's reply, pulling him in for a searching kiss. Feeling the redhead's muscles tense, he leaned back, breathing heavily at the boy's needy expression. "Do you want to leave, Lavi? I won't stop you, but it would be a shame to waste a perfectly good seduction.."

Lavi scowled up at him fiercely, shaking with expectant adrenaline. "You know I don't. I told you what I want, and then you started playing games." He pulled away from the older man's hold, walking around him to stand by the bed. "Come here, Tyki. Or actually.." He sank to his knees, bracing his hands on the mattress. Looking back at the man's astonished face, he smiled. "Here would be even better."

Tyki strode forward, pulling him to his feet with a growl. "I could have had you on the floor over there, Lovely. I hardly think you'll want your knees to hurt, too." Turning him around, he pushed him firmly onto the bed, following after a momentary pause to retrieve the still-present container of oil from the side table. "Don't lie to me if this is painful, Lavi. It defeats the purpose of keeping you here, if there's nothing but hurting."

Dimming the lights absently, he worked the bottle open, pouring the slippery liquid into his palm. "Spread your legs, Lavi. I think I'd like to play a bit more, if you don't mind." The redhead nodded eagerly, pushing himself back to give the man more room. Leaning in, he stroked his hand over the boy's skin, relishing the urgent shivers that wracked him as he moaned. "Goodness, Lovely.. Are you like this already?" He pressed his fingers inward carefully, hissing as the Exorcist arched into the touch.

"Patience, Lavi.. You're going to hurt yourself if you rush this.." He moved his hand slowly, brushing against the place that drew a wavering cry from the other. "Do you really want this to end so quickly, when you could take as long as you wish to enjoy it? There's no reason to hurry, is there?"

Lavi shook his head rapidly, panting for breath as he dug his fingers into the blanket. "I don't want it to be over, I want it to happen! Stop asking stupid questions and do me!" He ignored the faint stinging in his backside, reaching down to take hold of the man's arm. Jerking him up roughly, he cut off his surprised hum with a kiss, wrapping his legs tightly around the man's waist. Lifting his hips, he ground against the other insistently, leaning back to take a ragged breath.

"Don't tease, and don't ask if this is how I want it, either! I don't care how you do it, just hurry up and fuck me!" He lifted himself again, using his hold to draw the man closer as he whimpered. "Please..! I don't want to beg you for it every Goddamned time, Tyki! You act like I need convincing, and you know I don't!"

He pushed away a sharp surge of anger, forcing his too-firm grip to loosen. "I woke up wanting you, Tyki.. It was so bad that I was almost ready to take care of it myself when you got here!" The man's surprise turned to disbelief at his statement, his eyes wide as he struggled to lift himself away from the boy's body.

"Then let me do what needs to be done, Lovely! I have every intention of giving you what you want, but I won't let you hurt yourself!" Shaking off the redhead's hands, he rose to his knees, locating the discarded bottle without looking away from his flushed face. "You said that no one needs to hurt, Lavi.. Did you lie?" He coated his fingers carefully, closing the oil tightly before setting it safely aside. "I won't tease you, Lovely, so please.." He lowered his hand to breach the boy's unresisting muscles, his movements slow as he resumed his preparations. "It won't be long, Lavi.. I don't like waiting either. Doing things like this is enough to drive me mad as it is."

The Exorcist's shaking increased as he moaned, his voice harsh and disjointed with urgency. "I want to make you like that! You feel- God, it's so good when you aren't holding back.. Don't do that this time, I need.. Tyki!" He bucked desperately against the man's hand, crying out brokenly as he reached for the brunette pleadingly. "It's enough! I promise it is, so please.. Now!"

Withdrawing his fingers, the older man nodded jerkily, shuddering at the hard press of knees against his sides as he slicked himself thoroughly. "Yes. But be careful what you wish for, Lovely.. You may just get it." Taking hold of the boy's shaking legs, he lifted him sharply upward, leaning in to catch his mouth roughly as he pressed forward. Feeling the wordless mewl against his lips, he pulled back slightly, allowing him only a moment to adjust before establishing a demanding rhythm that left him gasping for air.

Breaking the kiss, he turned his face into the redhead's arched throat with a growl. "Like this, Lavi? You always tell me to fuck you harder, so maybe I shouldn't keep waiting for you to ask.." He laughed breathlessly at the Exorcist's rapid nod, his ragged cries driving him on despite his brief concern for the other's comfort. "Gods, Lovely.. I hope this is really what you wanted, because it feels far too good to stop.."

Lavi arched to meet his movements, his fingernails leaving shaky hieroglyphics on the man's skin as he clutched at his back and shoulders. "Don't.! I want it! I want it!" Speech failed him completely at the other's guttural moan, the low-pitched sound far more arousing than any words he could possibly have said. He could feel himself sliding backward against the blankets, the force of the man's thrusts pushing him steadily towards the headboard. A slight change of angle sent a jarring flare of pleasure up his spine, and he dug his fingers urgently into the sweat-slickened skin with a whimpered plea. The quick growl of acknowledgement in his ear was electrifying, along with the short press of teeth against his pulse, the two combining into a hopelessly erotic moment that brought his thinly held control well past the breaking point

Panting a desperate warning, he locked his ankles tightly around the older man's thighs, taking him in as deeply as he could manage with an almost feline cry of release. The brunette's answering howl made the brief stab of pain worthwhile, the sensations of heat and wetness inside him prompting a second wail from him as he shuddered violently.

For a long moment, there was nothing but harsh breathing between them, but a light touch against the man's back drew a hiss from him, even as Lavi noticed the cloying scent of copper in the air. Feeling a tacky stickiness on the skin beneath his fingers, he stiffened in horror at what he had unwittingly done to the older man in his passionate daze.

"Tyki..god..Oh god..M' sorry.." He whispered, jerking his hands away from the man's heavily scored back. "I wasn't...I didn't mean to..! Please don't be mad, I didn't want-" He faltered at the sight of his bloodied fingertips, clamping his eye shut to avoid the other's gaze. "I didn't mean to hurt you, I just wanted..!"

Tyki caught one of his shaking hands firmly, moving away from him with a soft murmur of discontent. Pulling him up to sit, he cut off his panicked apologies with a kiss, his free hand sliding behind him to rest between his shoulder blades. Ignoring both the boy's struggles and the faint twinge of protest at the movement, he kept the contact steady, licking questioningly at his lower lip for entry. Whimpering plaintively, the redhead allowed it, responding tentatively to his gentle urging as if he half-expected to be bitten.

Relaxing his hold, the older man sighed appreciatively at his cautious acceptance, pausing to nibble at his lip before pulling away. Seeing him prepare to resume his tirade, he shook his head, leaning in for a second time with a quiet negative. "No more, Lovely.. I know you didn't mean it, hush now." He swallowed the Exorcist's low whine, stroking a soothing line along his back. "Do you remember what you said to me when I bit you, Lavi? This is very much the same.." He chuckled at the other's momentary confusion, relieved that his sudden ranting had stopped. "I caused it, didn't I? What you felt was enough to make you forget yourself, so much that you couldn't control what you did?"

The redhead nodded guiltily, pulling his hand free of the other's hold with a shiver of disgust. "I'm sorry.. I shouldn't have let it happen, but.. God." He laughed quietly, taking a breath to calm himself. "Can I.. Let me see?" He leaned carefully around the older man, looking fearfully at the scraped skin. His hands clenched at the sight of it, the long tracks of his nails clearly visible even in the dim light. "Oh.."

He ignored the stinging against his palms, taking in the extent of the other's still-oozing wounds. Though they were shallow, the welts overlapped in places, leaving a gruesome latticework of lines across the width of his back, some places spanning the space from one side to the other completely. The worst of it was near the man's shoulderblades, where the cuts ran deeper and closer together. Hitching a breath around the lump in his throat, he returned to his place.

"I'll.. I'll clean it up, and..!" He jumped at the brunette's sudden forward movement, flinching back from the hand that rose toward his face. Tyki froze in the midst of reaching for him, astonished by his violent recoil.

"Why are you frightened, Lovely? I wouldn't.. Do you really believe that I'm going to hurt you?" He leaned back slowly, lowering his hand. "It's nothing to be so upset about, even the worst of it will heal by this time tomorrow! Didn't you notice that the cut on my hand was gone within the hour?" He held out the hand the boy had cut only days before, showing him the hair-thin line of a scar on the palm. "I told you, I heal much faster than a human does, it's part of the power I still have.. It wouldn't save me from something like a stabbing, but perhaps that's for the best."

Lavi slid to the edge of the bed, rising to his feet stiffly. Facing away from the frowning man, he shook his head. "It doesn't matter how fast it heals! Look at your hand, it still left a scar!" He stalked to the bathroom, hiding his pained wince with a growl. Snatching a washcloth from the pile, he wet it in the sink, swiping at his chest angrily. Rinsing it out, he reached down to scrub at his tender backside, pausing at the bright spatters of red on the white cloth. Biting his lip anxiously, he rinsed the material again, shoving it beneath the other clothes in the hamper with a quick glance toward the open door. He took another cloth in hand, soaking this one with cooler water.

He wrung it out carefully, returning to the bedroom in silence. Walking to the still frowning man's side, he sat behind him, dabbing gingerly at the lowest scratches. "I don't want these to be like that. You.. I don't want to leave any marks on you."

Tyki snorted quietly, turning his head to fix the boy with a stare. "Isn't it only fair, Lavi? That looks like it's going to leave a scar.. You said I was yours, so it's normal that you would leave some proof of your claim, isn't it?" He sighed at the redhead's abrupt stiffening, half-turning to face him. "If it scars, so be it. I can't think of a single person who has more right to leave their mark on me, Lovely." He stopped the Exorcist's imminent protest with a wave. "I can't undo what's been done to you, not the mark on your skin and not the marks that no one else can see."

Lavi resumed his careful cleaning, avoiding the other's eyes. "I told you I wanted it. I wanted everything you've done to me and more, before you had the first thought of bringing me here." He smirked to himself, shaking his head. "What we just did, too.. I wanted you just like that, even after I found out that you were.. It doesn't matter. You're completely right, I should be careful what I ask for."

He sighed at the man's revealed skin, the scrapes no less horrible without their cover of gore. "I hate to say it, but I don't know if this is really helping.. You should probably wash, or they'll get infected." He swabbed gently at a stray drop of blood, rising to his feet. "I'll run a bath for you, so just wait." He started for the bathroom, but the older man caught his wrist tightly, holding him still as he also stood.

"Will you stay with me, Lavi? I won't touch you, but I doubt I could reach my back alone.." He smiled slightly, amused at the boy's obvious surprise. "I'm really not angry with you, Lovely. I honestly think it was worth it, since you seemed to enjoy yourself so much.."

Lavi flushed a vivid pink at his lighthearted tone, stepping around him with a snort. "Yeah, I did. And so did the smartass I was screwing. Don't forget to hang your hat up before you get in the tub, you wouldn't want it to get squashed." He ignored the man's laughter as he entered the bathroom, muttering darkly about perverts who talk too much when they're bleeding on the wrong side of the bed.

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Ha, isn't it just too bad that poor Lavi has to put up with such a cruel authoress? Well, Tyki too, since I don't really treat him any better.. But it's ok, right? See you next chapter!

Enjoy that shit, I dunno how long it'll be until there's another. Oh, and comment. Please. It actually helps.

So why do I have to take it too..?

2008-09-14T17:31:34Z

The SEME or UKE Quiz
created with QuizFarm.com

You scored as The Homicidal SEME

You are the truly highest level of SEME as well as the most dangerous and sadistic. You love to force others to do your bidding and have absolutely no clue what others mean by 'feeling sorry'. You like the dark, evil, and heartless but nothings fun if you don't get to break it. You will not tolerate others pushing you around and an easy word for your personality is bossy. You could skip the romance and get right to the bed if you wanted to but then again you never even need the romantic-hoo-ha and that's why you're matched with he Devilish UKE. All UKE fear you in some way but that's jut how you like it. You could never befriend anyone that your little Devil-UKE didn't show you to which means the only SEME you would get along with would be the Breaker SEME. It has been established that you are the kinkiest kink in all of kink-town but one thing you really love is to make your partner beg and to punish them. Don't be afraid, be insane.

The Homicidal SEME

90%

The Devilish UKE

90%

The Breaker SEME

70%

The Optimistic UKE

50%

The Gentle SEME

45%

The Sorrowful UKE

25%

I'm a weirdo. But you already knew that ;)

2008-08-25T00:26:57Z

Wow, it seems that I'm an overcomplicated weird bitch! Isn't that great?

So, s3lfexpr3ssion, your LiveJournal reveals...

You are... 60% unique (blame, for example, your interest in tormenting the bitch) and 0% herdlike. When it comes to friends you are normal. In terms of the way you relate to people, you are keen to please. Your writing style (based on a recent public entry) is overcomplicated.

Your overall weirdness is: 114

(The average level of weirdness is: 28.
You are weirder than 100% of other LJers.)

Find out what your weirdness level is!

Nightmare Game chapter 5

2008-08-15T08:24:01Z

Yep, I finished it. Read it. Join my comm, because I'm seriously thinking of only posting the rest there.

http://community.livejournal.com/5ilver5erpent/5856.html#cutid1

Untitled short thing

2008-08-05T16:55:44Z

Just a lil short thing, since SailorLight22 thinks Lucky needs angst. Blame is hers.

Untitled
By SisterWicked

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He blinked up at the man who held him, his shock only slightly dampened by the low rush of sound in his ears. Opening his mouth to speak was hard, much harder than it should have been, when he'd spoken to this person over and over, told them his wishes and fears.. He'd told this person that he loved them, that the feeling was there despite what he knew would come of it.

Watching him cry was confusing, was that really blood, or just a trick of the low light that made it look like that? Was it the darkening of his vision that made it so? He didn't know.

The feeling of a finger brushing a heart was such a small thing, more unusual and strange than painful, but the implication of it was more than hurt, more even than agony. Was this feeling betrayal, could that really be a physical thing?

Even leaning at this angle he could see the tip-end of a scratch along the other's neck, a mark he'd left himself in the aftermath of a thing he hadn't believed could be made physical.

In the end, why had he expected anything less of this person, weren't they meant to bring harm, to crush out life? He hadn't believed that either.

When the fingers took hold, he flinched, but it still felt like nothing.

A movement of lips and air was something, words that made sense and yet did not.

'I don't want to/ I have to/ They will if I won't/ Can it be me?'

The sound was blurred, but he understood well enough to nod, to let it be this hand that un-made him. He wanted to believe in their pain.

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Well isn't that vague-but-not..

Chapter Three of Fall Away

2008-08-01T12:25:33Z

Also posted in various locations.. Join AssHat's LJ Community for newest updates!

Fall Away
A D.Gray-Man Fanfiction
By SisterWicked
Chapter Three

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Well, surprisingly enough, I think people actually like this! i guess I should get happy and write a lil more then..

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Last Time -

Feeling the boy's breathing hitch, he laughed. "That's why you're still pure, Lavi. No one with a heart would waste their time on you, but you said it yourself.." He shifted, stepping close as he allowed his clothing to phase through his body with a soft rustle of fabric on stone. "I have no heart."

The smile in his tone was unmistakable, as was his intent. The sensation of his bare skin against the boy's back brought him to full alertness, the slight ringing in his head forgotten as the man's hand settled firmly on his hip. For once, Lavi truly regretted his habit of speaking first and thinking later.

Ignoring the painful consequences, he jerked away, pressing hard against the stone in an effort to create a distance between them. Tyki hummed in dark amusement, following.

"Will you go back on your word, Lavi? This is what you agreed to, after all.." He leaned heavily against the shaking Exorcist's back, his free hand sliding over his trapped arms. "Your mouth brings you trouble, doesn't it? I had almost begun to wonder if there might be something in that pretty little head of yours, but I suppose your ignorance leaves little room for anything else."

Laughing softly, he almost missed the boy's choked sob. Pulling back, he angled his head to look at the Exorcist's flushed face. "Are you crying, Lavi? Do you fear me that much?" Lavi turned his head, avoiding the man's curious stare. Frowning, Tyki swung him around, bending closer to meet his gaze. "Look at me! What's wrong with you, boy? There's nothing to be afraid of, didn't I say that I won't hurt you?"

Lavi shook his head, his eye clenched shut despite the tears that escaped him. "I'm not!" He hissed, twisting away. "I'm not afraid, and I'm not like you!" His voice rose, the words shaky but determined. "I can't care about people, but you could! You had a choice, and you became the way you are! You're disgusting because you threw away what I would give anything to have, you bastard!"

He opened his eye, glaring up at the astonished Noah. "You're right that no one gives a fuck about me, why would they?! Even if they wanted to, I couldn't let them! You could have been a decent man, and you just let that go for this!" His voice rose to a shout, even as he continued to weep. The utter anguish in his expression halted the older man's angry retort, his grip loosening slightly as he blinked.

"You really don't know.." He murmured, shaking his head. "You think there was ever any choice? No, Lavi. The person I was never had one." Seeing the boy's eye narrow, he laughed. "I was born with the Noah within me, Lavi. When the time came for it to awaken, there was nothing that could be done."

Leaning down, he met the other's eye from only inches away. "All I am is a vessel, Lavi. This body was created to give form to the pleasures of Noah, nothing more." Taking advantage of the boy's confusion, he crossed the space between them, catching his mouth with almost frightening gentleness.

Lavi bolted upright, gasping in surprise as the man's fingers stroked at his skin. The slick wetness of the other's tongue against his lip left him shivering anxiously, a quiet whine rising in his throat as Tyki took hold of his hips. His instincts screamed at him to fight, but he couldn't seem to obey, the man's disturbingly cautious touches leaving him shaken.

After a moment, he relaxed, allowing the older man to pull him closer. Hearing his questioning hum, he shook his head slightly, leaning away from the contact. He opened his eye in surprise when the man let him move, and stared at him in speechless astonishment when he smirked. "You..How..What are you?" He blinked rapidly in disbelief as he took in the man's altered appearance, his eye widening in shock at the lightened color of his skin and eyes.

Where the man's features were the same, he could almost have been a completely different person, the shade of his skin paled to a light olive. His formerly golden eyes had also changed, the pupils humanly round against deep grey irises that were only just lighter than a true black.

With a flash of recognition, he realized that he knew this person, had seen him once before, if only for a short time. "The train, you're the one Allen played poker with when we first met Crow-chan! But you can't be!" Aware that he was raving, he shook his head. "When did you turn?" He demanded, glaring up at the amused man. "You were human when we met you! You were with normal people, Allen would have been able to tell if they were Akuma.."

Tyki nodded blithely. "They were human. As for when I became Noah, it was long before that, Lavi. I told you, didn't I? You know nothing of me." Leaning close to the still-shocked Exorcist, he laughed. "I'm not like the others, Lavi. There are two sides to me. The one you hate so much, and this one." Unconcerned by his unclothed state, he frowned mockingly. "I wonder if I should be insulted.. Even though you stared at me when we met, you didn't remember this body, did you? It's exactly the same, isn't it?"

He turned in a slow circle, smirking at the boy's sharply indrawn breath. "Even without the shorts and glasses, I find it hard to believe that you'd forgotten something you watched so closely."

Lavi flushed to the roots of his hair, looking away. "I didn't!" He protested, shaking his head. "I watched, that's my job!" Tyki snorted, stepping forward until the other tensed visibly.

"Is it also your job to undress a stranger with you eye, Lavi? The way you looked at me was positively indecent.. I wonder if anyone else noticed?" He smiled at the redhead's wide eye. "Did you think about me later, when you sat down to put your memories to paper?" He mimed writing with a finger on the boy's chest. "I'd be willing to bet anything that you thought about me very hard.. That night, at least." Raising an eyebrow at the Exorcist's deepening blush, he lowered his voice conspiratorially.

"You can tell me, Lavi.. Did it make you come like before, touching yourself while you thought about a man you'd just met?" He continued to trace idle designs on the boy's skin, lingering over the slight dip of his waist. "Would it lessen your shame if I told you of my own preoccupation, Lavi? I thought of you, that very night.."

Leaning in abruptly, he nipped a teasing line along the redhead's throat, licking over the skin of his jaw with a smile. Murmuring quietly against the rapid thrum of him pulse, he tightened his grip on the other's waist. "I wondered what it would feel like, to fuck you so hard that you'd scream when you came.. Did you think about that, Lavi? Did you bite your lip to keep yourself quiet, like you are now?"

He laughed at the boy's strangled gasp, pressing a hand against the small of his back. Pulling him forward, he rocked into his body with a soft hiss. "You still wonder, don't you? Just hearing me say it is enough to make you shake like this." He lifted his head, forcing the younger boy to meet his gaze. "My other half has lost interest, I think.. But this part of me still wants that, to hear you beg and plead for more."

Lavi closed his eye tightly, refusing to reply. Clenching his hands, he ignored the sting of his nails digging into his palms. Feeling the man's breath against his face, he jerked, staring up at him fearfully. "What you look like doesn't make any difference." He growled, struggling to lean back. "You're still the same, inside!"

Tyki hummed in amusement, shaking his head. "I told you, my Other is not me. This side of me is human, Lavi. Just like you." He punctuated his words with a slow roll of his hips, his hold keeping the redhead still as he repeated the motion. "And just like you, I want to answer that question. Is there anything in particular that you thought about, a place or a position that excited you? The floor here is hardly comfortable, but I had imagined looking at you, watching your face while I took you.."

He smiled briefly at the Exorcist's shiver, urging him back to the wall. "Would you like that, Lavi? I would hate to make this less than memorable, after all." He caught the redhead's mouth firmly, using his surprised gasp to gain entry for his insistent tongue. Thoroughly exploring the expanse of his back, he took hold of the other's shoulders, pushing him down to his knees before pulling away. "Will you let me have that much, Lavi? Like that, with your legs wrapped around me while I make you scream?"

Lavi shook his head, ignoring the wave of embarrassed arousal brought on by the man's quiet voice. "I said I'd let you, didn't I? Just shut up and get it over with!" He shivered at the coldness of stone against his skin, flinching when the other leaned over him with a deceptively mild smile.

"Is it unpleasant, Lavi? Perhaps this really isn't the proper place for these things.." He took a firm hold on the boy's waist, his free hand catching the embedded chain. "Don't fight me, I'd hate to lose half of you along the way.." Before the redhead could form a reply, he felt a shocking sensation of cold and motion, and the room vanished into darkness. Yelping in surprise, he blinked uselessly in an effort to see.

A mere heartbeat later, he winced, instinctively closing his eye as light and color abruptly returned. Ignoring the older man's soft chuckle, he turned his head, gazing curiously at his new surroundings. The room was large, but not overly so, the walls colored a vivid deep green. The furniture was sparsely distributed throughout, a dark wood with silver handles that caught the low light. Against the nearest wall was a bed, the curtains and spread matching the furniture in hue.

Looking back at the silent Noah, he scowled, annoyed at the man's amused expression. "Nice. I would say I'm impressed, but I don't like to lie."

Tyki smirked, nodding. "Of course. I don't particularly care for it myself, but the bed is much more comfortable than a bare floor." Without waiting for a reply, he strode toward the aforementioned object, pulling the spluttering boy along by his chained arms. Stopping at the edge, he fixed the other with a serious look. "Do you remember what I told you about childishness and games, Lavi?" He smiled at the Exorcist's grudging nod.

"Good. Another thing.. This part of me may be much closer to human than the other, but my power is unchanged. Do not make any foolish assumptions, Lavi. Do as I tell you, and no harm will come to you." He reached forward, catching the redhead's bound hands. "Come here."

Glaring at him fiercely, Lavi complied, stopping directly in front of his captor's equally nude form. He jumped in surprise when the man pulled forcefully on his bindings, drawing them through his body with a metallic clink. Laughing at the boy's stunned expression, he dropped them carelessly to the floor.

"Much better.. Now remember what I told you, Lavi. Keep your word, and all will be well." He smiled, taking hold of the redhead's shoulders. Keeping him still, he leaned in, covering the other's lips with his own as he turned him back against the bed's edge. Urging him down, he sighed into the kiss when the Exorcist's body tensed.

"Relax, Lavi." He murmured, pulling away only as much as was needed to speak. "There's no reason for you to fear this, I don't intend to ravage you just yet." He frowned at the boy's quiet snort, moving his hand to catch his face. "Your distrust is also unwarranted. I can be more forceful if I must, but that would be much less enjoyable, wouldn't it? Do you want me like that, Lavi?" He pushed firmly into his body, catching him off guard. The Exorcist braced himself on his elbows, refusing to lie back fully even as the man's bent knee came to rest between his legs.

"I don't want you at all! Rape is rape, Tyki, whether you force someone with blackmail or chains!" Turning away, he avoided the man's silent stare. "I said I wouldn't fight you, but I'm not going to lie about it. Even when I did wonder about you, it wasn't even close to this." He closed his eye tightly, shaking his head. "I thought you were human, Tyki. The person that I wanted doesn't even exist. None of it meant anything."

Tyki hummed quietly, smiling at his renewed blush. "Nothing, Lavi? I doubt that very much." Turning the other's head to face him, he smirked. "It wouldn't bother you as much as this if it were nothing. I think you're lying, to both of us." He stilled the Exorcist's denial with a shake of his head. "You can lie to yourself as you like, Lavi, but you can't lie to me. I can still see what it is that you want, and knowing what I am hasn't stopped you." Leaning in, he tipped the boy's face up to meet him, licking at his lips with a sigh.

"What did you imagine, Lavi? When you thought of this, what was I doing to you?" He stroked the boy's side carefully, watching the play of anxiety in his expression. "Did you think about my touch, what it would feel like to have my hands on you instead of your own? Tell me what you saw, when you did this to yourself." Feeling the muscles beneath his hand shudder, he smiled. "Do you remember how it felt, Lavi? Tell me what you did, when you were lying there in the dark, wishing it was me.."

Lowering a hand to the boy's hip, he smiled at his reddened cheeks. "It's nothing to be ashamed of, Lavi.. Don't you want to know how it really feels? Anything you imagined could be real, if only for tonight." Watching the Exorcist closely, he moved forward, pushing him further into the bed.

"Was it like this, Lavi? Did you take your time with it, or were you too impatient for that?" He dropped his hand to the boy's thigh, stroking the skin in small circles. Lavi gasped soundlessly, closing his eye.

"I didn't..You.." Shaking his head, he blinked rapidly. "It wasn't like this." He mumbled, averting his face. "I didn't have long, so.."

Tyki nodded encouragingly, his fingers sliding higher as he leaned in. "It was brief, then? No teasing, no build up of wanting, just a quick fix for your need? How unfortunate.. Perhaps I should do what I wanted, then." He bent his head, tracing the rise of one shoulder with his lips. "Will you let me do that, Lavi? I would hate to simply rush through this, there's more than enough time to indulge you."

Nipping at the boy's ear, he urged him down. "How did you really want it to be? Like that, fast and done with, or was there more to it? I could do that, if you wish, but I would much rather take some time with you.." He laughed at the redhead's obvious surprise. "Don't mistake me, Lavi. I want to have you soon, but I see no reason to deprive you of something beyond a quick fucking."

The boy paled slightly, his hands clenched. "It doesn't matter." He growled, fighting to keep his voice steady. "I don't have anything to compare it to, so it's all the same." Tyki shook his head, holding the redhead's gaze squarely.

"You have your imagination, Lavi.. Did you regret the brevity of it? Not knowing what it really feels like would certainly make a difference." He moved the hand on the other's thigh to his knee, pushing his leg upward. Resuming his hold on his bare hip, he slid forward, pressing against the Exorcist firmly. Resting his weight on his bent arm, he bent to lick over the boy's suddenly-increased pulse as he shifted his weight. Hearing the sharp catch in the redhead's breathing, he repeated the movement with a soft hiss.

"Did your hand feel like this, Lavi? Or is this better?" Continuing his slow rocking, he moved his mouth to the boy's jaw, kissing the point just below his ear. Lavi shuddered, swallowing a brief sound of surprise. The older man hummed in agreement, nipping at his earlobe. "It isn't the same at all, is it? Did you shake like this, when it was only a fantasy?"

Gasping a quiet negative, Lavi closed his eye to avoid the man's gaze when he lifted his head. Feeling the other's hand on his side, he jumped, eye opening in shock at the flash of pleasure that the movement provoked. "What-" He broke off, flushing in embarrassment. Tyki laughed, sliding his hand beneath the boy's back.

"Being touched is good, but touching someone else can be better.. Try it again, if it pleases you." Hesitantly, Lavi raised his hips, pushing upward almost fearfully. Humming in approval, Tyki moved to meet his uncertain attempt. "Is it good? Do as you will, Lavi.. There's no reason to be afraid." Bending his head, he sighed against the other's mouth. "Do you know how this is done? There are things that need seeing to, or it could be quite painful.."

Lavi tensed, nodding faintly. "You have to.. use something." He mumbled, looking away. "If you don't, it won't be.." His face heated abruptly, forcing the man to stifle a laugh. Lavi frowned, ignoring the slightly choked sound of his voice. "It wouldn't work unless you had something wet!" He blurted, turning back to meet the other's eyes. "You'd better have something, too. I'm not letting you do anything if you don't."

Tyki did laugh then, amused at the boy's stern expression. "I was only asking if you knew, Lavi. Don't worry about that, I hadn't intended to try without it." He smiled darkly, the movement completely serious. "Blood dries far too quickly to be of use, after all." Noting the redhead's wince at the reference, he sighed.

"If you know, there's no need to explain it.. Stay there, I'll only be a moment." He pushed himself to his knees, reaching over the other's body to riffle through the contents of a low table by the bed. Returning to his place, he held out a small bottle of what seemed to be oil. Raising an eyebrow questioningly, he sat the container safely nearby when the boy nodded slightly.

"I won't hurt you, Lavi." He repeated seriously, holding the Exorcist's nervous stare. "There may be discomfort for a moment, but nothing more. I can promise you that it will be worth that much."

Lavi shook his head, his expression blank. "The only promise I care about is the one you already made. Anything else is up to you, Tyki." He blinked at the man's expression, confused by his momentary disquiet. "What? This isn't about me, is it? There's nothing I can do but trust you not to lie, so the rest of what happens is just you."

Tyki nodded slowly, leaning down until they were almost nose to nose. "I don't lie, Lavi. Whether you believe that or not is beyond my ability to change, but I can tell you one thing.. " He moved closer, lowering his head to speak against the boy's lips. "If not for the other part of me..I would have stayed on that train until you left it."

Without waiting for a reply, he slid a hand beneath the Exorcist's neck, pulling him up to meet him as he relaxed against him. Urging him to respond with a careful nip, he sighed in pleased surprise when the boy accepted readily, his lips parting in silent invitation. He was even more surprised at the sensation of fingers against his back, and the soft whine that followed the touch. He made as if to pull away, but the redhead's grip tightened, preventing his retreat.

His questioning hum went unanswered, save for the slight pressure of a knee against his side, and an almost imperceptible shifting of weight from the Exorcist beneath him. Inhaling sharply, he pushed away insistently, ignoring the boy's muffled negative. "Let go, Lavi. What's wrong?" He frowned at the boy's almost pained expression, taking a breath to question him further.

Lavi cut him off, shaking his head. "Please don't say anything else, just.. Do what you're going to do, Tyki." The older man opened his mouth to reply, but was stopped again. "Dammit, shut up! I told you I won't stop you, so just get it over with! Telling me bullshit stories isn't going to make any difference, is it? You should have followed me to the hotel, if you were going to try lying your way into my pants! I might have believed it, then."

He looked away, clenching his hands furiously. "I didn't have time to think up some big ass seduction fantasy, but I sure as fuck didn't get off on you lying to me! I might have been stupid enough to want you, but I'm not retarded!" He turned to glare at the man's wide-eyed expression. "Now, either fuck me or kill me, but keep your Goddamned mouth shut while you do it."

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Ha, well there's the end of that.. I think there'll be one more chapter after this, so you can't kill me until I post that, right? Have fun, and please review, I'd hate to bother with this when there are a LOT of people waiting for NG to update instead!

Chapter Two of Fall Away

2008-07-18T07:57:51Z

This is it, for whoever bothered to wait ^_^

Fall Away
A D.Gray-Man Fanfiction
By SisterWicked
Chapter Two

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Well, here's chapter two. Before anyone asks, yes I know the chapters are much shorter than my normal. No, I don't think they'll vary too much in length. Yes, Chapter three will be done soon. Enjoy.

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Last Time -

Tyki laughed, shaking his head. "You wouldn't be able to, unless I allow it. As for the reason you're here.." He took hold of the boy's hips, jerking him forward sharply. "That remains to be seen. I had intended to destroy both you and the weapon you carry, but your reaction intrigues me.. Perhaps you'd be willing to trade yourself in exchange for your Innocence's safety?"

Lavi stared up at him in horrified confusion. "What? But that wasn't what you said! You said that we could leave together! I can't very well stay and go!" He pulled away from the man's body, leaning back as far as the restraints and the other's grip allowed. "Get off! I'm not going to let you play anymore games, Noah. Do whatever you're going to do and get it over with."

Tyki frowned at his reference, then laughed. "Surely you aren't as stupid as that, Lavi. I'm not interested in keeping a pet, after all." The redhead bristled at the term, his eye narrowed in annoyance.

"I'm not stupid! And I'm sure as Hell not offering to be your fucking pet, either! Say what you mean or shut up, fuckwit."

The older man snorted to himself for a moment, shaking his head. "Well! You certainly taste better than you sound, Lavi.. But I suppose I could be more precise, if need be." Still laughing softly, he leaned close to the redhead's ear, as if to share a secret. "It means to give me your body, Lavi.. To let me fuck you, in the basest term."

Lavi inhaled sharply, his eye wide in astounded horror. "No. You.. I won't let you do that." Jerking away from the chuckling man, he turned his back to him, shuddering with panicked revulsion. "Ask for something else, Noah. I'd rather give you my eye than.. God, you can't be serious."

Tyki hummed in mock disappointment, draping his arms around the boy's waist. Resting his head against his shoulder, he smiled. "What else would the embodiment of pleasure ask for, Lavi? Can you honestly say that you expected any less, from someone who just finished kissing you?" He nuzzled briefly at the other's skin, taking advantage of the boy's shock to press closer. "I think you're afraid of it.. That you may discover it to be pleasant."

Lavi stilled instantly, his hands tightening into fists. "You're crazy. It doesn't matter what you call it, you're out of your fucking mind if you think I'd let you touch me." Ignoring the man's close proximity, he turned his head carefully. "Nothing about you makes sense, you know that? Why would you even want to do that with your enemy, Tyki?" The man sighed in resignation.

"Aren't I touching you now, Lavi? You don't seem to be so adverse to the idea, physically.. Is it only your mind that needs convincing? That's easily managed.." He stepped quickly through the boy's body, drawing a strangled gasp from the odd sensation. Smiling down at him wickedly, he trapped the other's nape in his palm, the other hand dropping to the front of his jacket. "Allow me to demonstrate, for a moment.."

Catching the Exorcist's mouth, he pulled on the heavy cloth, removing it before the boy could protest. Releasing it onto the floor, he licked at the corner of the boy's mouth, his hand resuming it's place against his abdomen. Taking hold of his waist, he leaned back on the wall, dragging the redhead along with him. "Open your mouth, Lavi.. No harm ever came from a kiss."

The Exorcist growled in negation, lifting a booted foot to kick. Tyki caught his knee easily, using his new hold to jerk the boy flush against him. "Are you so eager, Little One? I thought it would take far longer, before you spread your legs willingly.." He recaptured the redhead's mouth, shifting firmly against him. Making use of his startled yelp, he repeated the motion steadily, stroking the boy's tongue with his own.

Feeling his captive's shiver, he smiled against his lips. Releasing the hold on his neck, he lowered his hand to his back, pulling him still closer. He sucked gently at the boy's lip, allowing him room to breathe. "It feels good, doesn't it? I can feel your heart racing, Lavi.. Are you still so sure of yourself? You aren't fighting at all.."

He paused, taking in the Exorcist's wide eye. "Do you need further convincing, Lavi? You seem to be rather surprised, have you never done this?" The redhead paled noticeably, facing abruptly away.

"That's none of your fucking business, is it?" He spat on the floor in disgust. "Some people aren't demon whores, taking anything they can get."

Tyki laughed quietly, shaking his head. "Not anything, Lavi.. I can pick and choose amongst the ones who interest me, after all." He followed the ridges of the boy's spine with his fingers, using just enough pressure to avoid tickling the sensitive area. "You should be flattered, I usually prefer a bit more maturity in my choices."

Lavi shuddered, resisting the urge to squirm at the man's idle touches. "Hardly. I doubt that most people would be flattered by an egotistical lunatic knocking them out and chaining them up.. You must be running out of simpleminded women and old men to molest, if you're this desperate." Tyki raised an eyebrow at his statement, still tracing leisurely designs on the other's shirt.

"Hm, some of the women were a bit dull, but I don't recall any 'old men' in my dalliances.. Maturity of the body is well and good, but maturity of the mind is usually what the term signifies to me." He smiled at the boy's disbelief. "I don't feel a need to form lasting attachments, but a bit of conversation is agreeable, now and again. Why waste time on a lover who lacks the ability to string more than two words together, Lavi?"

The Exorcist scowled at him, leaning away from his hand. "Like you give a shit what some random human has to say! All you care about is what they can do for you, what you get out of it! This is the same, you don't want me, you just like forcing me to choose." He shook his head, looking away. "You should have caught yourself a better companion, Tyki. I'm not going to waste my time lecturing someone like you on morals, it wouldn't matter."

The older man sighed, nodding slowly. "I know more about morals than you'd like to believe, Lavi. You're right when you say that I don't care about other people's thoughts, but it isn't because I don't understand." He caught the boy's face, turning his head to stare at him seriously. "I don't care because I know that any one of them would sell their body or their soul for nothing more than a few moments of pointless happiness. That's what keeps the Earl in business, isn't it? Their greed?"

Lavi met his gaze warily, committing his words to memory in the event that he actually managed to escape to record them. "That doesn't matter. Everyone wants something, but if your Earl didn't exist, they wouldn't be able to create akuma, would they? He's the cause, and you.. Noah are helping him find people to corrupt."

Tyki snorted. "They find their own ways of getting what they want, Lavi. I thought you Bookmen watched?" He leaned close, smirking at the boy's unwilling gasp as he pressed against him. "People find other ways to express their greed, the Earl just offers a unique service.. Besides that, you've strayed from the subject." Lowering the hand on the Exorcist's back, he pulled firmly on his shirt, tugging it free of his pants. "What is your answer, Lavi? Is your weapon worth less than yourself, after all?"

The redhead struggled to avoid the hand sliding purposefully beneath the hem of his untucked shirt. "Stop! I don't want you touching me, damn it!" He jerked away, ignoring the feeling of the other's body against him as he fought. "There's no choosing! Letting you have what you say you want wouldn't be any different than telling you to go ahead and torture me to death!"

The older man blinked at him in mild surprise. "No difference? You think I would make you suffer, despite your willingness? You truly are an innocent, then.." He removed his hand, lowering it to rest at the small of the boy's back. "I wouldn't cause you pain, Lavi. That would defeat the purpose." He turned his head, licking teasingly along the side of the other's throat. "My satisfaction would come from the knowledge that you hated me, but absolutely loved how I made you feel.." He closed his teeth gently on the rapid beat of the boy's pulse, humming at it's sudden increase. "I wonder if it's fright that makes you shake like that, Lavi.. Are you so afraid of enjoying yourself? I could always destroy your weapon and have you regardless, if choosing is truly beyond you."

Lavi pulled away, tearing his leg free of the other's light grasp. "You disgust me," He snarled, glaring at the unpurturbed man. "Like I said, you only want to make me choose, when your mind was already made up! Do what you want, and when you've had your fill.. then we can talk about your morals." Tyki nodded agreeably, taking the boy's chains in his hand.

"It may not be a blood-oath, Lavi, but it's close enough to consent for me." He seperated the chain swiftly, plunging his hand into the wall and withdrawing, the metal caught firmly within. "Is that more comfortable for you? I presume you'll allow me certain liberties, but let me warn you.. I have no patience for childishness and games, unless I choose them. If you decide that you've made a mistake, close your eyes and bear it, it would be much better than attempting to fight."

Realizing that the older man meant to claim his 'payment' immediately, Lavi shuddered noticeably. Forcing himself to remain completely still, he supressed the urge to jerk away from his captor's roaming hands, even as they worked at the fastening of his pants. Averting his face, he bit down hard on his lip when he felt the man draw his boots away from his feet with a laugh. The sound grated on his nerves, but he allowed himself to be pushed back until his shoulders met the wall.

Seeing his forbidding expression, Tyki laughed again. "You're frightened." He said, turning the boy's face toward him. "Is it me you fear, or yourself? It's such a waste, really.." Bending close, he covered the boy's mouth purposefully, licking at the cuts from his teeth. "You shouldn't hurt yourself, Lavi. As I said, I don't intend to harm you." Releasing the redhead's face, he lowered his hands to his waistband. "Perhaps it would be better to show you, since you don't seem to believe me."

Pushing at the loosened cloth, he slid his hands down to the curve of the boy's backside, pulling him closer. "I'm curious.. What have you done, Lavi? Even something so small as a kiss unnerves you, are you really a total innocent?" The boy scowled, embarrassed despite his fear.

"What rock have you been under? I've been a little busy saving the world, that doesn't exactly leave a lot of time for whoring, does it?" He fought the blush that rose under the man's intense scruitiny. "What? It's not like I'm saving myself or some shit, I just haven't had the opportunity!"

Tyki raised an eyebrow skeptically. "Of course. I'm sure you would have gotten to it eventually."

Biting back a sharp retort, the redhead settled for an angry glare that only seemed to further amuse the older man. Ignoring his unspoken animosity, Tyki nodded thoughtfully. "That would explain your nervousness, but not the reaction you have to me.." He leaned close, barely pressing against the boy's body. "Does fear excite you, Lavi? It seems as if you almost want to be afraid, like my touching you without your consent only makes what I do that much more enjoyable.." He tightened his hold on the other's skin, smiling darkly.

"Maybe I should take advantage of that, since it means that you want this already, even though you deny it." Lavi shuddered unconciously, wavering between disbelief and horror.

"It's..I don't! You're crazy to even think that! All I want from you is- " Tyki cut him off with a kiss, urging his lips to part even as he shoved the boy's open pants over his hips. Pressing hard against the wall, Lavi struggled to pull back from the feeling of a hand against him, his eye wide at the suddenness of the man's movements.

His protests became panicked as the other began to stroke him firmly through his underclothes, his muffled cries gaining him nothing more than a smirk from the older man. He arched away from the stone, attempting to buck the man's weight off of himself, but found the effect to be opposite of what he wanted as the Noah slowed his touches to a crawl.

Lifting his head, Tyki narrowed his eyes at the boy's deep flush. "What you want from me is obvious, Lavi. You can content yourself with the thought that I'm forcing you, that anyone would react to this.." He squeezed deliberately, smiling at the Exorcist's choked gasp. "But it's all the same. Wanting this, wanting me to do this, it's all one evil."

Without allowing the boy time to respond, he pulled at his shirt, dropping it beside his discarded scarf and jacket. Bending to one side, he pressed his mouth to the redhead's throat, his teeth closing on the skin with a soft hiss. Lavi stiffened at the sensation, his heart beating painfully fast in anticipation of the bite that was sure to come. The pressure of the man's teeth lessened, and he pulled back with a smirk.

"So you do enjoy it.. I can feel it, you know." He laughed softly at the boy's gasped denial, keeping his touch steady even as he knelt. "This side of me has very sharp teeth, doesn't it?" He tugged the Exorcist's undershorts down, leaving them at his feet. "Perhaps I should bite you, to leave a mark to remind you of the penalty for lust?"

Lavi shook his head, pulling against his restraints. "NO! Not..!"

Tyki smiled, licking the bend of one leg. "No? I thought you didn't fear pain, Lavi.. I think you do need a reminder, however.." He took a firm hold on the boy's hips, leaning in to lap at his arousal tauntingly. Feeling his involuntary shiver, he repeated the action, lingering over the places that seemed to be the most sensitive. His efforts were not wasted, and soon he had reduced the boy to near-desperate cries as he sucked on his aching flesh.

Pulling away with a contented hum, he raised his head to take in the redhead's furious blush. "Should I stop, Lavi? You didn't agree to that, after all. You only gave your word to let me take you.."

Lavi shook his head jerkily, his knees shaking with anxiety. "Damn you! You know I don't want you to stop! You knew I wouldn't want you to before you did it!" Taking a breath, he growled in frustration. "Stop playing with me! Finish what you started or so help me God, I'll..!" Tyki laughed, nodding.

"There's no need for threats, Lavi. I'd be more than happy to continue, if you want it so much.." He resumed his movements, relishing the boy's ragged moans as he increased his pace. Feeling the telltale signs of his impending climax, he tightened his hold on the other's hips, urging him on with a slight press of his teeth. The redhead bucked away from the wall with a choked scream, the force of his release bringing him almost to his knees before the other's hold prevented it.

Wiping his mouth carelessly, Tyki smirked. "Goodness, was it really as good as all that? I believe I'm flattered, Lavi." Lowering the boy carefully to the floor, he urged his face up to meet his gaze. "Would you believe that what I'm going to do is even better? I wonder if you could handle that, if this was too much for you.."

Lavi glared at him dazedly, the look only slightly less severe for his shaking voice. "I can handle anything you do, idiot. You didn't do anything special, any bitch could have done the same."

Rather than the anger he expected, he was met with an amused nod. "Indeed. One of your lovely female companions could have done it, but I doubt either one would be so inclined. The injured one seemed to be particularly taken with the Walker boy, and the other was a bit old for you, wasn't she?"

Lunging forward furiously, the boy yanked at the chains that kept the laughing man just out of reach. "Don't you talk about them like that! They aren't like you, they're decent people!" He clenched his hands, ignoring the protesting throb of his injured wrist. "You're nothing but a pathetic cockwhore. A worthless, twisted person who gets off on hurting people because they're ten times better than you ever were!"

Seeing the man's surprised flinch, he laughed. "That's your problem, isn't it? You can have any other worthless person you want, but nobody with any standards would have you! They can probably see the sickness in you, just like I can see how fucked up you really are! You hurt good people because they're too good for someone like you. That's why you help the bastard that owns you, because he uses their goodness to make them just like you!"

The flat crack of the older man's open hand across his face echoed dully in the closed room, the sound belying the force of the blow. Jerking the Exorcist up by his hair, Tyki leaned in close enough to smell the blood from his split lip on his breath.

"Shut your fucking mouth, boy. What you know of me could fill a thimble and still leave room for your brain." Fighting the urge to simply crush the dazed boy's head against the wall, he tightened his grip until the redhead's eyes watered. "Promise or no promise, I'll kill you if you don't keep still. You think of yourself as one of those 'good people, Lavi? You're as worthless as anyone else I've had, or do you have no standards?"

He shoved the Exorcist back viciously, keeping his grip as he pressed him to the wall. "You'd have me, wouldn't you? Not ten minutes ago, you were right here moaning like a bitch in heat for me, weren't you? What does that say about your character, Lavi?" Turning him around, he moulded himself to the boy's back, smiling at his pained yelp. "You're no better than you say I am, really.. You say you have nothing, but I believe that to be your own doing, Bookman. You care for no one, and no one cares for you."

Feeling the boy's breathing hitch, he laughed. "That's why you're still pure, Lavi. No one with a heart would waste their time on you, but you said it yourself.." He shifted, stepping close as he allowed his clothing to phase through his body with a soft rustle of fabric on stone. "I have no heart."

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XD there's that chapter, I wonder how far I should run before the archer-fangrls won't be able to shoot me for leaving it there? Besides that, the next bit will be done soonish, as I have a birthday AND a several-day long trip coming up in the next while.. Fear not, you'll get your noncon :)

Please read and review. Also, check out AssHat's new comm, 5ilver5erpent

New fic - Fall Away

2008-07-11T06:25:24Z

Here's the first chapter, and YES, it's Lucky again. Please comment or I may decide to drop it.

Title - Fall Away
Rating - NC-17
Pairing - Lucky
Warning - Dubious consent, Language, graphic description of M/M sexual intercourse. Please don't be stupid enough to try reading this at work.

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Well, since someone asked for more non-NG Lucky, I suppose I could be accommodating. Appreciate this mightily, as I doubt I will do another. This is technically AT, I suppose, since it completely disregards the established plot from mid-Ark onward.

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Lavi faced the smiling Noah squarely, refusing to allow his aching body to collapse. Each of his pains were accounted for by his impeccable memory, the blows that the man had landed stored faithfully away amidst a thousand other memories, waiting for the boy to empty them onto paper. Seeing the other shift, he readied himself for another round of attacks, his eye focussed on the blazing purple energy that coalesced around the man's hand.

Despite his protesting muscles, he straightened, lifting his weapon into a defensive position as he struggled to shake off the nervous anxiety that filled him at the older man's disgustingly pleasant smile.

The dark haired Noah hummed in amusement as he stepped closer to the glaring Exorcist, his handsome features obscured by his windswept hair. "Are you ready, boy? I'd love to stay and play with you, but I'm afraid I have a previous engagement."

Lavi snorted derisively, tightening his hands around the handle of his hammer. "Ready when you are, asshole. It's a shame about that 'engagement,' but I'll be sure to tell your buddies how you looked with your hair burned off."

Tyki laughed quietly, gathering his power into a blade. "I doubt it will come to that, Little One.. Are you of a mind to wager?" Sighing at the boy's determined silence, he waved a hand briskly. "Very well. I'd be willing to bet that you'll fall, right here on this roof. If that's the case, I'll allow you to live out the night." His eyes glinted strangely, the pupils contracting to slits as he smiled. "With me."

Lavi spat in disgust. "Oh, how generous of you. I'll take bodily dismemberment, if it's all the same to you." Shaking his head, he grinned. "What if you're wrong? Then what?"

The Noah met his gaze evenly. "I should think that would be obvious, boy. I would be at your rather dubious mercy, would I not? If I'm mistaken, then I forfeit my life in payment." He raised an eyebrow questioningly. "Would you like to shake on it, Exorcist? Ah, of course not, what am I thinking.. That would be the genteel thing to do, and you are a bit rough around the edges."

Lavi stared at him in disbelief. "This from a guy who works in a coal mine? What the fuck ever, man." He smiled, leveling the crossbladed tip of his hammer in the other's direction. "The only rough edges you need to worry about are these. Come on, I've got an appointment myself, actually."

The older man nodded, bowing in mock politeness. "As you will, boy. I look forward to your company." With that, he raised a hand, a soft rush alerting the Exorcist to his danger far too late to prevent the swarm of carnivorous insects from descending. Lavi flung himself to the side, cursing his carelessness in allowing the man to distract him as the butterflies gathered above and behind him.

Swinging the enlarged hammer viciously, he plowed through the violet-winged golems, their bodies scattering like gleaming confetti as the Innocence struck them. Whirling around, he caught sight of the Noah's dark figure, already within arms reach. He stumbled back quickly, willing the Flame Seal into existence and bringing the hammer down to ignite it.

The older man laughed mockingly, sidestepping the hurried attack even as he launched one of his own, slamming the boy down to the roof beams. Waiting patiently as he rose, Tyki sighed in false displeasure. "You'll have to be faster than that, boy. You do wish to outlast the sunset, don't you?"

Lavi growled in annoyance, lifting the hammer again. "Fuck you, you smug bastard." Ignoring the throb in his bleeding knees, he struck, driving the point of his weapon directly at the man's unprotected face. Tyki stepped away again, phasing through the wood of the rooftop to reappear directly beside the winded Exorcist. Catching him by the lapels, he hurled him against the eaves violently, smirking at the glazed expression of surprise in his widened eye.

"Goodnight, Little One. Rest yourself, the nights are longer in Noah's mansion." Without waiting for a response, he walked forward, trapping the boy against the building's last remaining top wall. Smiling widely, he placed a hand on the other's forehead, cracking his head against the surface with a shove, catching him easily as he slumped forward. "Sweet dreams, Exorcist."

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Lavi stirred faintly, aware of a disorienting angle of perception. Opening his eye with a hiss, he shook off his lingering vertigo, freezing as he took stock of his position. Despite his previous unconsciousness, he remained upright, his skin pressed firmly to something vertical and smooth. Leaning back, he felt a moment of panic as he realized that he could move only slightly, his arms caught from above by restraints that clinked faintly as he pulled experimentally.

Sensing the presence of a person, he craned his neck around awkwardly, glaring at the seated form of his captor. "You should have killed me, Noah. I'll get these off eventually, and when I do.." The man snorted softly, rising with a bored hum.

"I highly doubt that, actually." He leaned against the wall in amusement, looking briefly at the boy's defiant face. Reaching into a pocket, he produced a cigarette and a match, lighting the end carelessly before shaking the flame out. "By the time you managed to free yourself, this night would be long done. Don't fret yourself, however.." He smiled, the expression sending a shock of vague unrest through the other's unsteady muscles. Leaning close, he inhaled deeply, taking in the scent of his captive's sudden fear.

"Mm, how pleasant.. But besides that, there's no reason for your anxiety, boy. You'll at least live to meet the sunrise, as I promised." His smile widened, no more friendly than before. "Are you uncomfortable, Little One? I would hate to spoil our evening with things like pain I haven't caused.." He reached forward tauntingly, drawing a finger up the boy's spine. "Do you have a name, Exorcist? Something I can call you, as it were?"

Lavi arched away from his touch with a shudder, averting his face with a growl. "I won't tell you anything, Noah. Do what you want, I'm not afraid of pain." Tyki laughed quietly, repeating the movement as he nodded.

"Of course you aren't. Is there something that you are afraid of, boy? I could think of several things that would bear testing, if you're so inclined.." He stepped away from the other's line of vision, moving directly behind him. Seeing the redhead's abrupt tension, he reached around to cover his eyes, the skin of his palms surprisingly warm against the Exorcist's face.

"Are you afraid of losing what vision remains to you, boy? I could take that from you with only a touch.." He demonstrated briefly, flexing his fingers over the other's tightly closed eyelid. "It would be nothing to remove your eye.. I could pull it straight through your skull, if I wished it." Lavi stiffened at his teasing, struggling to remain perfectly still.

"Why would you bother, Noah? I thought hearts were your specialty." Tyki laughed at the reference, his breath fanning the other's nape.

"Indeed, but you're a Bookman, aren't you? Your kind have no hearts." He pressed close suddenly, forcing the Exorcist to step forward to meet the wall. "There are any number of reasonable substitutes, I think. The lack of one leaves only the question of what I wish to take, in place of the missing part."

Lavi shuddered, resting his forehead against the cool stone. "Pain is pain, idiot. Taking out anything is going to hurt, and then I'll die. Not much you can do with a dead Exorcist, is there?" Feeling the man's laughter against his back, he leaned closer to the wall in an attempt to move away. "Get on with it, Noah. I always wondered if all this Heaven business was a load of horse shit, anyway."

Tyki followed his movement, leaning flush against his back again. "Now, now.. Didn't I say you'd be alive to greet the sunrise, Little One? I'm quite sure I can find a means of keeping you well until then.. Incidentally, you won't be needing this, so.." Lavi's head snapped up, turning as well as he could to stare at the man's hand, now directly beside his face.

"Need what? What are.. No. No! I'll kill you if you touch my hammer!"

Tyki laughed, shaking his head as he stepped away from the furiously struggling boy. "You'll hurt yourself, Exorcist. And as for your toy, what did you think would become of it? Destroying Innocence is another of my forte's." He curled his fist around the item in question, pale light surrounding his hand as he smiled. "I think taking this would be an excellent start to our evening."

Lavi jerked against his restraints desperately, ignoring the sharp sting as the metal dug into his wrists at the movement. "Don't! Damn you, leave it alone! It's mine, and it's all I have!" His voice cracked under the strain of his volume, his struggles intensifying at the man's mildly surprised expression. "Give it back! I need it, you bastard!" His left wrist popped audibly, prompting the older man to disperse his power with a frown.

"Harming yourself changes nothing, Little One. What you say is intriguing, however.." Dropping the Innocence into the pocket of his coat, he shrugged it off, placing it on the seat of his vacant chair. "Why do you claim that you have nothing, boy? Does the Order abuse it's servants now?" Lavi pulled harder, hissing at the feeling of his strained wrist and hand.

"Give it back!" He snarled, wrenching at his still-unmoved restraints. "It doesn't have anything to do with them, the hammer is mine, no one else can use it but me! It doesn't matter who I'm supposed to be, Nyoibo knows who I am!"

Tyki hummed in amusement, shaking his head. "How sad for you. If the only one who knows 'you' is that thing, you really do have nothing. Should I destroy it first, or you, Exorcist? You act as if it would be the same thing. Curious." He returned to the boy's side, smiling at his pained wince. "See there, you've hurt yourself over nothing. But now I know what you fear, so your suffering was less than completely in vain.. Is there something you'd rather have me take, boy? You really should give me your name, since you'll be here for some time.."

Lavi glared at him balefully, turning away with a snort. "You could take a running leap."

The man's lip quirked in a half smile, amused at the redhead's bravado. "It wouldn't really matter, I can walk upon air as easily as the ground.. Besides that, what should I call you, Exorcist? It's a bit rude to address a guest as 'boy', isn't it?" Lavi refused to answer, keeping his face averted.

Tyki shook his head, refusing to be deterred. "Are you afraid to tell me? Do you think I would taunt your companions with the knowledge, when next we meet?" Catching the boy's face carefully, he turned his head to meet his glare. "You could die here alone, boy.. Do you wish for no one to acknowledge you?"

Lavi pulled away from his hand, laughing. "Could? I'd say that was a given. For that, I don't think I deserve to be remembered.. It's my job to kill you, not being able to is worse than being forgotten."

The man frowned in confusion, but nodded. "I could see how you might think that. There is something I wonder, though.." He released the other's chin abruptly, straightening. "What would you trade for another chance, Exorcist? What would you give, to be set free with your Innocence intact? If you could leave this place in the morning, what would you leave behind?"

The redhead stared up at him, his eye wide with wary hope. "You wouldn't let me," He muttered, scornfully. "Everything you say is a lie, Noah. No way would you let me leave here, not with my hammer, and not alone." Tyki smirked faintly, reaching for another match.

"But the Devil always keeps a bargain, Exorcist.. Your Bible tells you so." He laughed at his own allusion, lighting his cigarette. "Any pact you make with me will be binding, boy. I've never broken my word. It's odd that your Church tells lies, while the Earl speaks only truth.."

Lavi shook his head, still wary. "If details and technicalities don't count. I doubt he tells people that the akuma they summon will be wearing them, after. That idea wouldn't be too popular, now would it?"

Tyki laughed again, nodding. "True enough. Most of them don't ask, but I'm sure they wouldn't mind the answer. People in mourning do foolish things, boy. Being what you are, I suppose you couldn't relate."

The boy growled irritably, looking away again. "I know exactly how they act, asshole. It's what I do, remember? I watch, and then I write. Just because I don't feel it doesn't mean I don't relate." The man's laugh was strident, echoing in the dark room.

"You are entertaining, boy.. But the offer was not in jest. What would you give in answer, along with the pleasure of your name? I can be reasonable, to an extent." He leaned closer in anticipation, his voice lowered as he spoke. "What is equal to the pair of you, in your eyes? I could destroy the other, if you can only think of your own worth.." He gestured toward his coat, making as if to retrieve it. The Exorcist bolted upright, opening his mouth to protest.

"Calm yourself, boy. You haven't given your answer, have you? I'll do nothing, until that or sunrise." He smiled amiably, the expression oddly flat. "Well, as far as your Innocence, that is. Can't have you crying 'details', can we?" He chuckled at the boy's indrawn breath. "Dawn is quite a ways off, isn't it? I'm sure there's something I could do to keep you..occupied until then.."

Lavi paled, refusing to look away. "I can occupy myself, thanks."

Tyki hummed in amusement, shaking his head. "That would be rude of me, to leave a guest to their own devices.. Will you give me your name, boy? Something to call you until you make your decision?" Lavi sighed in resignation, annoyed at the man's persistence.

"It won't make any difference, it wouldn't be the real one." Ignoring his better sense, he muttered. "Lavi. That's what it is, this time."

Tyki smiled brightly, nodding. "That's better. I'm afraid I can't shake your hand, but a pleasure none the less." Lavi snorted at the reference to his position, scowling.

"God, you're even less funny than I am, and that takes work. Isn't it also rude to chain your guests up and torture them?"

The older man frowned thoughtfully. "I suppose, but a good host can allow for the situation. Would you rather not be tortured, Lavi? I had assumed that your pride would demand it, in place of more tolerable confinement." He laughed at the boy's indignation, toying with the ends of his scarf. "I could make concessions for your comfort, however.. Is it too warm in here?" He unwound the object carefully, dropping it to the floor. "Is that better? You could do with a new one, Lavi.. That one is rather..tattered."

Lavi shook his head in annoyance, ignoring the chills brought on by the other's cool hands. "I like it just fine, actually. Besides the obvious, what is it that you want? I already told you that I don't have anything."

Tyki feigned thoughtfulness, tapping his chin with a finger. "What are you worth, Lavi? Is your Innocence so important that you count it as all you have?" He circled the other carefully, noting his tenseness as he moved to his blind side. "You claim that it means more than anything, would you trade anything to keep it?"

Lavi fought the urge to turn, to keep the dangerous man in view. "There's nothing but it and me, Noah. You wouldn't understand."

Tyki frowned abruptly, leaning close to speak. "Do you not have my name, Lavi? Your choice of terms is too narrow, for one of your profession." He bent even closer, moving to the other's back. "Do you need reminding? Perhaps your memory is flawed.." His breath tickled the redhead's hairline, prompting the rise of gooseflesh across his exposed skin. "You should use it, if you know. I think it would sound lovely, from your lips.."

Lavi stiffened in alarm, feeling the man's hand between his shoulder blades. "Tyki Mikk!" He blurted, leaning away from the touch. "You're the embodiment of Noah's Pleasure. I know who you are, are you happy?" The older man sighed contentedly, following the Exorcist's quick retreat.

"Are you afraid of me, Lavi? Something so simple shouldn't affect you so.. Is it the same for everything?" He dropped his hand to the boy's waist, pressing his lips briefly against his hairline. "I thought you feared nothing, Lavi.. Should I test your sincerity?" Now the boy did try to turn, scrambling to avoid the man's grip.

"Don't! You said you wouldn't..!" Tyki cut him off with a laugh, running his hands up to the Exorcist's arms.

"I only said I wouldn't harm you, Lavi. I doubt that this counts as 'harm'.." He caught the boy's restraints swiftly, phasing the links into a single chain. Urging him to turn, he smiled at his momentary confusion. "Simply another power," He murmured, backing the other toward the wall. "Useful, at times like this.." Ignoring the Exorcist's building retort, he caught his face in his hands, lifting his head slightly.

"This won't harm you, either." He lowered his head, covering the boy's surprised gasp with his lips. Feeling his protesting jerk, he pressed closer, keeping his hold gentle but firm. Nipping at the corner of his mouth, he soothed the sting with a careful lick, smiling at the redhead's whine of dissent. Lifting his head slightly, he murmured quietly against the boy's skin. "Does that hurt, Lavi? I wouldn't think you'd be surprised, knowing what I am.." He leaned in a second time, following the shape of his lower lip with his tongue.

Lavi clenched his jaw mutinously, struggling to turn away. The older man hummed in amusement, continuing his patient teasing. Lowering a hand to the boy's stomach, he reached through his clothing, stroking the skin beneath tauntingly. The Exorcist jumped in surprise, his mouth opening to protest.

Tyki denied him the opportunity, licking at his parted lips before dipping in to explore his mouth with a sigh. Ignoring his muffled sounds, he sought out his retreating tongue, nudging against it playfully with his own. The boy refused to cooperate, pressing flush against the wall as he fought the other's hold. Pulling back to breathe, Tyki laughed quietly, taking in his narrowed eye and reddened face.

"You're blushing like a schoolgirl, Lavi. Such a fuss, for something as small as a kiss.." Raising an eyebrow, he smiled. "Do you not know how, is that it? Rather a late bloomer, aren't you?" The redhead spluttered indignantly, straining to wipe his mouth against his sleeve.

"What the fuck is wrong with you? If that's what you brought me here for, screw you! I'll bite your tongue off if you try that shit again!"

Tyki laughed, shaking his head. "You wouldn't be able to, unless I allow it. As for the reason you're here.." He took hold of the boy's hips, jerking him forward sharply. "That remains to be seen. I had intended to destroy both you and the weapon you carry, but your reaction intrigues me.. Perhaps you'd be willing to trade yourself in exchange for your Innocence's safety?"

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Yes, I know.. An unfortunate place to stop, but such is life. Expect chapters two and possibly three within the month, please review if it's not too much trouble. As always, feel free to contact me via IM/PM/Email/AssHat Productions. Thank you for reading. Please review

Comments on Fic

2008-05-26T07:21:44Z

Ok, I really don't mind getting comments. Hell, reviews are awesome, but in the future, please leave a means for me to reach you? I tend to reply to my reviewers personally, and several of you have left me without the means to do so! That is all.

Now On LJTalk

2008-05-15T14:50:11Z

Just to let the masses know, I can now be reached in messenger courtesy of LJTalk. Isn't that just overwhelmingly fantastic? Right. Well, if anyone feels the urge, go right ahead and message me, I may even see fit to respond. That is all.

A New Horror

2008-04-27T19:59:33Z

As you can see, I have become disgusted with the lack of decent fanfic for the Tyki/Lavi Pairing. To remedy the situation, I have decided to author one such fic Myself. Read and be awed that One so utterly unconmhmcerned with with your pleasure can nevertheless bring you such enjoyment.

http://www.hostinghelps.com/5ilver5nake/AssHatProductions/Fics/NightmareGame.htm
http://www.hostinghelps.com/5ilver5nake/AssHatProductions/Fics/WakingDream.htm
http://www.hostinghelps.com/5ilver5nake/AssHatProductions/Fics/InsomniacDawn.htm
http://www.hostinghelps.com/5ilver5nake/AssHatProductions/Fics/FatefulNight.htm

Comment, if it pleases you. I believe I will continue regardless, but your entreaties may speed the process somewhat.

EDIT: Chapter 3 added. 4 To be completed soon. Looking at the site/aff/ff hitcounts, you people sure do love your Lucky..

EDIT The second: Chapter 4 added. Thanks for all your reviews and/or comments, please feel free to leave more, if it pleases you.